Im new to the whole forum thing. Im struggling to find anything useful so feel like this is the best place. I have been with my partner for 10 years and married for almost 2. He has asked me from day one to do a strip tease for him. I’ve always brushed it off and laughed but he’s always been consistent with wanting one. We do all sorts of weird and wonderful things in the bedroom but this is just something I’ve never been able to bring myself to do without feeling cringey etc. If I’m gonna do this, I wanna do it right, feel sexy and be able to give him exactly what he wants. He’s touched upon the idea of like a combination of a burlesque dance routine and a general strip. but I honestly don’t know where to begin, I wanna get this right, any advice?
I don’t have much experience in this area, but my wife loves to dance. She will often dance around the bedroom on the beginning of a playdate, and we have some fun costumes.
She doesn’t do a strip tease but she enjoys dancing - I’ll either watch, grinning like a Cheshire cat, or get up and dance with her.
I guess the two main things I would say are:
It’s something she enjoys - I’m not putting any pressure on her
It’s strictly for fun - nothing serious
In our bedroom, it’s pretty much about both enjoying what we like and having a big laugh and giggle at the same time.
If you can frame this in a way where it’s an experience you think is worth having - for yourself - then you will be off to a good start.
But - although I kind of believe in ‘fake it til you make it’ in most aspects of life, make sure it’s something that you feel comfortable doing. Unless you can find it fun, it’s hard to imaging how it will be enjoyable for anyone else.
I think if my wife was doing a strip tease, it’s just about enjoying the experience together - not getting it ‘technically’ perfect! But if that’s what you are worried about, there’s probably a YouTube tutorial somewhere!
Thank you for the response, I’m aiming for it to be fun of course. I just worry because I lack in confidence in myself that a routine would help with the guidance and make it a little more comfortable. It’s something Ive always liked the idea of but never got myself there. YouTube definitely has some, so thank you!
Because as a couple we’ve always joked around and found fun in teasing each other, it’s the one time where I don’t want it to be a big joke, I wanna own that moment. We have young children too, so having that time to spice things up is important.
get some ideas form online pole dancing/stripping videos
take a pole dancing/other similar class (it’s also amazing exercise and I’m told it’s great fun)
Realistically, whatever you do and however successful you think you’ve been in doing it, he’s a lucky guy for having someone care so much about his happiness to try. He will love it because you took a shot. Effort is king.
Sexy burlesque is so easy to do but will cost a bit as you need the lingerie - corset, stockings and shoes - but so sexy - check out a few videos online
I don’t know to be honest, I don’t know how I feel about that. I mean we’ve always been open and honest about what we like/would like to do, but it’s never really come up in conversation. Maybe worth approaching that one
Ok, so i asked him how he’d like it and he doesn’t seem to have a preference on how I dance for him, but as I mentioned previously a routine is definitely my go to for confidence.
Lounge feels like the better option and a Chair.
I asked about music and the song he has chosen is… you can leave your hat on - Tom jones. So I can see the humour coming out of him there that song is fine I guess just will be difficult to remain straight faced
I love generally dancing, I used to dance before my children so I’m sort of potentially going to do a combination of the Tom jones and then follow onto maybe a Beyoncé- dance for you sort of thing… I don’t know
I’ve been looking at burlesque, I’m just trying to find a routine and the right outfit. As you said it’s costly for the layers. I’ve been tempted to go to a dance school and see what I can do but I was really hoping to do this for him over the weekend, so pushed for time also
You may be overthinking this and putting too much pressure on yourself.
This is purely a personal opinion, but if my wife was providing a striptease I would simply be over the moon that she had mustered up the confidence and self-belief to do it and was maybe starting to see herself as I have always seen her, which is nothing short of a Goddess.
If you are taking your clothes off for him and gaining some self-confidence at the same time I suspect he will be very happy with the situation!
It’s easy to lose confidence after children as you will think of your bad points (mine are tummy and bingo wings) but he will not notice these and no doubt look at your bum , boobs , vagina , legs - wearing sexy lingerie can help you with these issues - wear high waisted knickers will help a lot and if your legs are not do good - get into stocking…
As I said before burlesque helps a lot as the lingerie is big and one sexy thing is full length gloves that go all the way to your armpits - these are so sexy taking off and again stockings - these 2 alone will build your confidence and drive him wild - just strip slowly
Slowly working on my routine, more unfit than I could’ve imagined and yeah I hear you with the whole lingerie thing, I’ve just been practicing in my general clothing and feel far from sexy I’m gonna place my order in a little while and make the most of that when they arrive
I’d say maybe look up some videos online if burlesque strip performances to get some ideas to help inspire you and then practices some bits till your happy with what you’d like to do for him
Ok so I know that he’s picked Tom Jones, BUT does that song really do it for you?
I would pick a different song to make it a bit sexy and then follow it up with Tom Jones for a bit of cheese. Have a hat ready, feather boa if you’ve got one and really exaggerate all your moves and have some craic with it. If you can walk and dance ok in heels, and if you’ve got some then wear those.
But really he just wants to see you dance and gradually get naked. He’s going to be like a kid at Christmas just because you’re doing this for him, I bet he’s already humming with excitement because you’ve asked him about it!
Personally, I wouldn’t go to elaborate for your first strip tease - if any moves etc don’t go exactly to plan, it may knock your confidence more.
I’d just keep it simple, maybe a loose shirt and tight skirt with heels over lingerie, so they are relatively easy and sexual to take off, and just focus on his reaction rather than on what you are doing?
Another possibility, if you think it could give you more confidence is to wear a maskerade mask?
In all honesty I’ve never really come across a song that made me feel sexy. I was just generally accepting of the fact that it was a song he has chosen and had some form of a beat that I could work with.
I’ve chosen two pairs of heels that I will practice in over this week, one pair bigger than the other. I’m aiming to wear the bigger heel but not sure on the practicality just yet .
My outfit is on its way and should arrive tomorrow
I haven’t told him that I’m going to do this, I’ve arranged childcare, and will just wait for a moment once he’s home from work. He’s asked for so long now, I don’t think he would have any clue at all I think me asking about his preferred song, that he’d just take it as a pinch of salt that I’m asking out of curiosity not because I’m actually going to do it
I’ve chosen my Outfit and have gone with simple layers over the top.
I don’t think he’s gonna know what to do with himself, I think he’ll be so overwhelmed that after ten years I’ve took a chance lol
I like the idea of a mask, I might have a look for one. Maybe a little bit of comfort in that, thank you. I’ve had a few people mention about having a drink first. I haven’t touched alcohol in like 4 years so that’d be interesting
that song is fine I guess just will be difficult to remain straight faced
I think me asking about his preferred song, that he’d just take it as a pinch of salt that I’m asking out of curiosity not because I’m actually going to do it