Hi would you and partner go to swingers club and what would you allow or not allow
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Yes 100% but would talk about it first be open and make sure we stick to rules that we lay out together that canāt be changed untill the night is done and your talking about next time 
what would be allowed will be different for everyone, even between the two if you which is why you set limits first in a normal situation (car drive, watching big brother etc!) and not in the middle of sexy time 
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We have spoke about it many times and both feel it would be something we would be up for in the future, whether we ever actually pursue it or not is another question.
Other than both having to be equally comfortable and happy and as G_and_S says with continuous communication. My main no go would oral.
How about you @bold_desire
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We are talking about it. Going as a couple to play around others first. Then see how the mood takes us.
I love the idea of seeing her with another guy or guys, but we want to make sure we are both comfortable in reality.
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Yeah weād love to go to a club to be around other people, to watch and be watched.
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Weāve been to swinger clubs a few times now & weāve mainly done soft swap.
Can I question the thought process behind being ok with sex and no oral?
Swinging is out for me and wife. She will definitely not swing or include any partners in any way. I respect that. We have an excellent sex life as is, so no complaints. Not saying I donāt fantasize, but thatās the extent. Have to respect my wifeās wishes.
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To be honest I have struggled to explain this in the past, but will give it another go 
I personally just feel oral to be so much more personal and intimate (although I in no way feel that sex isnāt) with oral I feel so much more open and vulnerable and dont think I could be that way with someone I didnāt trust, same with giving, I feel it is very personal and feel highly connected to Mr 0 during , (although again not that I donāt during sex) ahhhh ā¦ā¦ maybe the old saying of sex or āmaking loveā comes into play here I feel sex can just be sex and feel oral needs a connection 
. But then even just to think about itā¦.the thought of seeing Mr 0 have sex with someone else turns me on hugely, however the thought of seeing him go down on someone else makes my stomach go over and my heart sink ( weird I guess but thatās what I feel) I must also point out that I have only ever been with Mr 0 and this is all assumptions as never having been in the position I canāt even be certain that I could ever do any or all of it
I hope that waffle somewhat makes sense all though probably wired to most.
I will also point out Mr 0 does not feel the same way he feels they are both on par but however, somewhat understands where I am coming from and respects my feelings.
(Mrs)
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Sorry for our ignorance, but whatās a āsoft swapā?
As I understand it a soft swap is one which doesnāt involve penetration.
Generally itās a swap where anything may be done up to but not including penetrative sex.
Worth noting that some peoples interpretation may differ.
Iāve heard some say tuat for them itās where only the girls touch eachother, and the guys stick to their respective partners only.
Iāve heard some others say that they may swap partners to include up to oral / kissing / āhand-stuffā etc.
Though the exact limits varies based on individual comfort levels.
Either way it never involves penetrating someone elseās partnerā¦ which is a āfull swapā.
I know exactly what you mean. @JoCat and I said something similar in another thread maybe a week or so ago.
Itās an interesting perspective, and interesting to hear othersā viewpoints.
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Yes absolutely. I brought it up in a topic back in March too see other peopleās perspectives but think I failed to explain what I mean. Maybe that was a bit clearer I hate trying to get feelings across in text
Soft swapping is when the girls will give the opposite guys oral & same with the guys on the girls.
I know this doesnāt matter at all, as all that matters is how you feelā¦ but I wonder what most people think is āmore intimateā as a general question
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Since she started pegging me I have come to realise that any act in which one person inserts something inside another personās body is an incredibly intimate act but for me the most intimate of these is anal penetration.
Wife & I have been to a swingers club, but only being with each other around other horny couples. To watch and be watched.
Weāve discussed it and yes we would but more to take in the atmosphere really.
Our rules would be that he can do anything he likes with anyone he wants but I would only watch/ join in anything that includes him and females.
Itās not likely to ever happen due to career based issues. Maybe one day in another country.
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Iām sensing a new thread is coming 
