I'm totally new to this forum, and to be honest totally new to sex toys! My girlfriend is rather inexperienced with them, too, and I wanted to ask some advice of those who might be able to offer it - and where better to go?
I originally had a four paragraph blurb here explaining my situation, but it's actually irrelevent. Suffice to say I have a very low to non-existant sex drive, whilst my girlfriend's is very high. As such, we have both decided that a rabbit vibrator might be a good idea.
However, she recently had the Mirena Coil fitted because she absolutely positively does not want children, and certainly not be accident, and was told by the nurse that there are strings that sort of "hang" down into the vagina. These must be checked on a semi-regular basis, apparently, to make sure that the coil itself has not shifted. She is therefore worried that a rabbit, amazing as it may be (and she's been told by a LOT of her friends that a rabbit is probably the greatest invention of all time!), might interfere with these strings. As far as I'm aware, one of the things that makes a rabbit quite so special is the rotating part that stimulates the g-spot. She is worried that this might get tangled up with the string and cause real problems.
Given that neither coils nor rabbits are particularly rare among the better gender anymore, I would think that there must be someone out there on these forums who has experience in these matters. Will her coil - or, more specifically, the strings that hang from it - be affected by a rabbit vibrator, or will there be no issues at all?
I would love her to be sexually satisfied (or at least orgasmically satisfied) when I cannot offer her that myself, and a rabbit just seems to be the ultimate in achieving that.
I have a mirena & I think perhaps whoever explained it to your OH didn't really do a thorough job. There are strings but they don't hang down as such, well mine don't, they're trimmed to the right length, mind kind of sit against the cervix if that makes sense? You are supposed to check each month that the strings are still there as it is an extremely slight possibilty that the coil may either come out or go inside, all you have to do is reach inside once a month, usually in a sitting position to feel for them, easy.
They have had no impact on either my sex life or sex toy use and I have toys of every type including rabbits, but I would say if the Mirena is put in correctly there's no risk of entanglement but I'm no GP so I would suggest your OH explores these concerns with her GP or whoever will be putting it in.
As for best toys to get, a rabbit can be a good start & the LH Jessica Rabbits are good but equally there are people who they do nothing for, so it can be a case of trial and error sometimes? Read some of the guides on the website & check out the fab returns policy too. Good luck with your search.
Sorry if I've waffled on, am sure others will have things to add as I know there are a few Mirena users on here.
Yarp, same as MTC here, I have a coil and have shoved many a doodah up there, with no ill effects.
The theory of the rotating-ness catching would only really work if there was something to actually catch the threads in the first place, and/or a fast enough rotation to catch it that way. As in whacking an electric drill into her might cause issues, but I don't think that'd be specific to coil-users.
Nah, should be safe, the threads aren't long enough to get involved in anything other than maybe being felt when she or you are poking around. But if she's worried that they might catch, or that they're too long, or anything, then she should make an appointment, if only to put her mind at ease. They tend to be quite understanding about the paranoia that comes with inserting random items into bits of your body you can't see, and prefer folk to ask 'stupid' questions than let a concern have a negative impact on their life, however insignificant.
I have a mirena coil & use a rabbit quite frequently & have had no problems.
The threads just aren't long enough to get caught on anything as the GP trims them when the coil is fitted so like MTC says they sit just against your cervix.
I just had mine replaced less than a week ago & have used my rabbit etc since & had not trouble at all x
But definitely, if she's concerned at all she should go back to her GP so they can put her mind at rest or even do an early coil check to see that the strings are in the right place x
Thank you for your help everyone! She's not worried enough to consult a GP (especially given that she's Irish, so it would therefore cost her upwards of fifty euro just to hear the doctor say "you're overthinking it - go out and have fun!) so this should put her mind at ease. It was a minor concern of hers, and now nothing should get in the way of me being able to buy her such a lovely gift!
I can't wait to hear of her experiences once we've chosen one and given it a try. I think she's settling on the slimline Jessica Rabbit, as that's supposed to be very good for beginners. Thus far she's only used a clitoral massager (loved it) and a bullet vibrator (didn't do anything for her). But, since she's been told that a rabbit is on a whole different level to toys that just stimulate the clitoris, she thought she might like to give it a go!
Here's to her enjoying many happy orgasms, and me not having to feel guilty!
Thanks, people! This is truly one of the best websites on the internet!
As a GP I can confirm what the others have written that there is no problem! So go enjoy yourselves! :)
excuse me, ms. GP lady please, but is it easy to feel the strings?? i read on woman's health that they can be easily taken out just by pulling on the strings... i take it you have to pull very hard, or it could just come out any time....??? O_o are they safe when using ben wa balls too? the rabbit i have is 6", how can i feel strings that end near my cervix with my fingers, which are much shorter than 6"... i don't think my rabbit reaches all the way to my cervix.... :/ i think i'm confused!! X___X
won't my OH be able to feel them when we're making love?
I'm not a GP, but it is my thread, so I might be able to answer that. My understanding is that when a woman is sexually aroused her vagina elongates owing to the a shifting (lifting) of the uterus. Thus in a non-aroused state the strings can be felt because the cervix is "within reach", so to speak. But when you're using a toy or having sex your vagina will have lengthened with the onset of your arousal.
1. In theory, it's easy to feel the strings. I can't feel mine, because I have such stubby fingers that I can't reach, but my OH has (and resisted the urge to tug, bless him!).
2. Since it's sort of anchored by the top of the 'T' shape, you would have to do some serious pulling (and probably do yourself an injury in the process) to get it out. They have special pokey bits, and a much better visual angle, when they're taking it out, so while they'd be able to pop it out with minimal fuss, it's not something you should be tempted to try yourself. And if someone did start yanking, you'd feel it before it got out.
3. He might feel them, depends on his length, how sensitive, where they're lying, etc. But they're unlikely to bother him. If ye did find they were interfereing, you should go to the clinic or a GP and see if they need to be trimmed.
4. Ben Wa balls should also be fine, they don't tend to go high enough to get a grip on any dangling bits.
It is not as easy to pull out as some people write about. And the strings left behind should only be about 2cm from the cervix (which is what the guidance recommends we leave) so not alot to hold onto to pull out... so I wouldnt worry unduly about internet health info... often more misinformation given than anything else.
The threads are very thin and can be felt hanging outside the cervix. They shouldn't interfere with normal intercourse however, as most men are too caught up in the moment to feel these threads (they really are thin!!!).
You should be able to feel them by inserting (clean!) fingers. Remember that the vagina is an amazingly stretchy thing, so while you might be able to feel your cervix, you also wont have any discomfort with your larger toys since it all stretches to accomodate.
The FDA has a nice online info sheet here is you want to read a bit more about it, http://www.berlex.com/html/products/pi/mirena_patient_insert.pdf
thanks for the advice! (and, sorry to have hijacked your thread a little there, rxx2jp!!) for some reason i'm still freaking out just a little about the idea... ha... i'm still debating going back onto the depo injection or going for the IUS... i'd really like to just go without* for a while though and get my body back on an even keel hormone-wise >__<
*without hormone-based contraception, not just.. without contraception! ha...
Sorry to change the thread topic a little - but im seriously considering going on the coil, since I cant take the combined pill, cant have the implant (cerazette gives me constant month long periods) cant use the patch (im allergic to the stickier part), so am left with the mini pill which my dr doesnt really want me to be on as none suit me so far, or the coil.
Im 19, havent had kids (I know most people do before going on the coil) and I was wondering if this makes as much a difference as people say with pain etc...?
But to sum it up...it all depends on you. There's absolutely no way of telling how you as an individual will react to it. In theory, it'll make it slightly more uncomfortable to have inserted, and possibly a longer period of cramping after, but there have been mothers who found the whole thing agonising, and childless women who barely noticed, so it's impossible to say for sure.
They do ususally do a 'sizing' before actually inserting it, and can do that as a separate procedure, so if the sounds being inserted and them poking around is too unbearable, they can stop before ever even getting the coil ready. I got both done in a oner because I'm impatient and had no reason to delay it, but if you ask for the two appointments to be separate they should be able to accommodate you and give you time to mull it over before the final poking.
Since my thread has gone off-topic I might as well help:
My girlfriend had the coil inserted when she hadn't had children. The only thing that was particularly different was that the nurses were very surprised she was doing so, and one even encouraged her not to have the procedure "because she might change her mind". This was in very Catholic Ireland, though, so if you don't mind having to potentially tell a nosy nurse to mind her own f*****g business, then there's no issues. My girlfriend - who is terrified at the prospect of procedures down there; she had to take valium for a smear test - said that it was only a little pinch, followed by two days of mild "period pain".
She's fine now, and couldn't be happier that she's not as protected from the risk of pregnancy as if she'd had her tubes tied.
Since my thread has gone off-topic I might as well help:
My girlfriend had the coil inserted when she hadn't had children. The only thing that was particularly different was that the nurses were very surprised she was doing so, and one even encouraged her not to have the procedure "because she might change her mind". This was in very Catholic Ireland, though, so if you don't mind having to potentially tell a nosy nurse to mind her own f*****g business, then there's no issues. My girlfriend - who is terrified at the prospect of procedures down there; she had to take valium for a smear test - said that it was only a little pinch, followed by two days of mild "period pain".
She's fine now, and couldn't be happier that she's not as protected from the risk of pregnancy as if she'd had her tubes tied.
That's daft! One of the many benefits of the coil is that you CAN change your mind! It has no effect on your fertility long term!
