+1 from me with this
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I would be upset too (putting it mildly) if my OH sat talking to other girls online. Most men watch porn as do women and I would rather he watch it with me so I can share in his excitement. Watching a pre-recorded film is totally different in my eyes to talking and participating in on line activities. I feel for this poor person with people trying to blame them for this situation! Everyone/couple are different and different things are acceptable in different relationship’s. If both parties are happy then what’s the problem but if one feels betrayed and neglected because of another’s action then something is not right in that relationship and has to be addressed.
It’s an interesting subject though. You should start a new topic on it. 
Edit: And here it is: 
@Kitty-Cat01
Yes maybe we are moving the thread , but maybe there is a connection on the interaction side.?
Before joining i think I might have raised an eyebrow at some of the activities discussed, but seeing how many people enjoy sex in all its formats has opened my eyes and acceptance to different preferences and peoples sexualities.
The initial question still remains in my head though, is it wrong , when your OH is unaware of your interaction ,albeit you want to give them pleasure from what you have learned.?
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@glitterismyfavouritecolour - What follows is purely my personal opinion, and I’m aware that it’s one that many people here will disagree with - may very well find quaint and old-fashioned. Maybe it’s a generational thing? I dunno. It’s just how I feel. Before I say it, though, I want to make very clear that in doing so I am in no way criticising or sitting in judgement of anybody here who may be engaged in the “cam girl” business. I’m not dissing anybody, OK!
In my opinion (and that’s all it is), regardless of whether it’s “industry” stuff or home-made material, ordinary non-interactive porn is a branch of showbiz. It’s a show. If a partner of mine was watching that stuff, I wouldn’t give two hoots (unless it was dodgy, exploitative etc. 
)
To my way of thinking, interactive cam-girl work falls into a different category. Basically I see it as a branch of prostitution. Think about it: the client(s) ask the girl to perform acts for them, and she gets paid for doing their bidding. What else can it be? Provided the girl is in charge of what she chooses to do (i.e. there is no pimping/exploitation going on), I have no problem with that. I have friends who are (or have been) hookers and rent boys. It’s an income stream, end of.
So, bringing this to bear on your situation with your partner… I think that what he’s doing equates to visiting a prostitute (or, to be more accurate, having a prostitute visit him in your home!) - and I think your discomfort with it is totally understandable and justified.
Just my two pennorth. Make of it what you will!
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Some interesting points made so far. None wrong - because everyone will be different. As with anything relationship wise or sex wise there’s no one size fits all.
If you’re hiding something from a partner, whether it’s just watching something or interacting with someone else in any way, shape or form then that should be a big red flag. If they know about it (and assuming they have no issue with it)…crack on. We all have different interests and tastes. Just because I don’t like something doesn’t mean the wife won’t. Just because I enjoy something doesn’t mean she will. It comes back to the same things as many a subject. Communication and honesty. What works for some wont work for others and you may not like the answer to questions in a discussion. But it’s better to be open than hide things.
We rarely watch porn together yet in the past have enjoyed swinging as a couple on a regular basis. Yet if I was to go on cam sites behind her back now and she found out (a purely hypothetical scenario) I’d expect to wake up one morning with her largest dildo rammed where the sun doesn’t shine coated in chilli sauce as she’d no doubt be slightly upset with me.
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I watch porn, and watch it with OH. I have no desire to interact live with a cammer, no disrespect to anyone who cams.
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I think just being honest with your partner, not going behind their back about anything and then each respecting each other’s point of view goes a hell of long way to a contented and happy relationship.
My OH also has no desire to interact with cammers …apart from me!
I’ve never been a full time cammer, just dip in and out now and again but if he ever said that he felt unhappy about me doing it then I would stop.
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I think it’s a really interesting discussion, so thank you for raising it and being so open and honest. I personally see porn and camming/interactive sex work as different things. To me, watching porn is purely a visual stimulus to arouse, whereas with interactions with a sex worker there is an element of seeking a response from another person, and seeking more of an emotional connection.
For me it would completely depend on the relationship I had and the boundaries we had set within that. For me, it’s not about whether I’m enough for that person (as I personally don’t think one person is able to satisfy all of another persons needs, but that’s a whole other debate), but more that if they are doing something without an open and honest discussion about it that comes to an agreement acceptable to both parties.
In regards to porn addiction, I am not a professional/expert, however any form of addiction is classed as a compulsive behaviour. So something becomes an addiction when you start to have less control over it: not being able to go without it; not being able to stop; planning activities around it; it impacting previously enjoyed things/activities etc. Don’t know if that really helps at all, but I think if there is a concern then it is worth speaking to a professional in that field for sure. I listened to a really good podcast last year from someone who had a porn addiction, so may be worth having a look at other media to get a better understanding of it.
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Thanks everyone for all your thoughts on this, I hadn’t replied before now because it’s a bit of a sore subject that makes me upset when I think more into it.
It’s been good to read the different points of view, I don’t feel like I have a massive issue, just that the reason I get upset with the camming side of things is because of the deceit it involves, and that I feel like a horrid ugly moose. That I am not fanciable and that I am an idiot.
My partner is on here too and knows about everything I post so I’m not saying anything behind his back or anything that we haven’t talked about before. I have said these words to him in the past so we had agreed to a shared account on a cam site and that for me to be fully trusting and for things to be ok that we could both log in and see what was going on.
If he wanted to cam I would be part of it, either in the background or whatever, but nothing has happened and I feel 99% sure that he has another account.
So if we talk about things like this I get a brick wall and nothing gets sorted, it just stays in my head all the time. I believe that he knows my feelings on this and doesn’t want to upset me so hides his needs/etc perpetuating the problem. I also think that secrecy is part of the fun for him so doing stuff together will always be boring.
I would like to be told the truth and to feel like the person I love so much can share everything with me, it sucks that I see it as an issue but he doesn’t.
Pretty sure he won’t reply on here, just thought I’d share my thoughts as I’ve noticed a few threads recently about porn use etc and it seems to be a topic that seems to cause a bit of stress.
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