What would you class as cheating??

I'm really interested in your thoughts lads and lasses:
What if your partner really kissed someone at a party for instance. Does paying for sex count or is it recreation, like a game of squash after work? Would you forgive a drunken one nighter if your partner showed specific remorse? I've heard some guys say that oral sex isn't cheating, because only penetrative sex counts as being unfaithful? What do you think?

Its all cheating to me... If my man kissed a girl there would have to be a reason for it....he should be happy kissing me and not need to kiss anyone else.
As for the one nighter I would have to cut off his ball sack I think!!

my boyfriend kissed someone when we'd been together for a year and i count that as cheating. I always thought i'd leave someone asap as soon as anything like that happened but ive stayed with him and we're still together nearly 2 years later. I think a kiss could be forgiven once especially if alchohol is involved but anymore than that i definately couldn't forgive!

and as for prostitutes hell yeah that cheating!!! unless you and your girlfriend/wife have sex problems and have specifically agreed because then id rather it was a prostitute as thats no feelings involved, its a job to them afterall.

i would not forgive ,even if it was a kiss,1,if he payed to have sex with anyone..I Would strangle him & use whatever i could grab and pull it so tight around his neck & make his eyes pop out & his nuts,,i would do the same even if he didn,t pay for it. If u got to go else wear for it ,then thiers no point of a relationship as the trust & respect would have gone,sex is sex ,be it oral or penetrating,it,s all cheating.If i wanted to have sex with a women or a different man & even though my partner agreed i couldn,t do it while i was with him ,i love & respect him to much to do that. The only thing i wouldn,t mind is a peck on the check... no further.

Cheating is any kind of sexual contact with someone outside the relationship, without permission. This includes kissing, caressing, and cyber/phone sex.
As for forgiveness...I don't really know how I'd react. I've never been in the position (and hopefully never will be). Him doing something like that would kill me, and I doubt I'd ever be able to trust him again...but I love my boyfriend to pieces, and breaking up would break my heart, no matter what the reason. So *shrugs* hopefully I'll never have to decide what I'd do.

i hope you never have to go through it either. Different couples have different rules though don't they, some might find oral acceptable and other are completely fine with having a fully open relationship, it depends on your boundreys. I think you can never say what you'd do until you're in that situation. As i said before i thought id leave my guy at the first sign of cheating but that 1 kiss wasnt worth ruining our otherwise great relationship. It was rocky for a while but he was worth sticking with through it. I think it depends what kind of situation you're in with them

flirtybabe i agree with u on the situation as it,s true you don,t know what you would do and till it does happen & you are right,one kiss isn,t worth throwing away a good relationship as you have rightly said you have got threw it & have worked things out ,i suppose for me is the fact i,ve been in a relationship and forgiven but things didn,t work out & really wouldn,t want to go threw that again.

no i wouldn't go through it again with another guy but hopefully my guy wont mess up again and i won't have to go through the hassle of finding a new guy and waiting to find out if hes a cheat! lol

Anything touching is cheating, basically. I wouldn't like the idea of my bloke flirting with someone else, but I know I'm a flirt so I can't really talk, as long as he didn't do it in front of me.

But if he even kissed someone else, that would be it. And I'm pretty sure he has the same opinion for me.

too be quite honest kissing/ innappropriatly touching (i.e the bum), sending dirty texts/e-mails, obviously foreplay and sex i class as cheating....and also even if he went to a strip club i wouldnt be that happy
if my bf is happy with me...he shouldnt have the need to that with other girls

Interesting debate, I doubt I would mind a drunken kiss that much, but if he ever had sex with anyone else that would be the end. I have engaged in cyber-sex in the past, just to find out what the fuss was about (my husband knows about it). He didn't think I was cheating, he knows I am curious and if he had objected I might not have done it. I think he is just glad it was internet sex as I done quite a bit of cheating during my first marriage. This time around, I haven't cheated on him once in nearly 20 years. I had a few drunken kisses at a works night out, but told him about it. Again, he didn't find it a big deal. He trusts me and I trust him. I wouldn't have sex with anyone else as he is a brilliant lover, hence no need to. BTW cyber-sex is boring, might not be for men, but it done nothing for me.

Does anyone think that emotional betrayal is worse than physical???

I used to get texts (sexy but also caring) every morning from a guy who i knew was engaged...we also met up for sex but somehow the talk afterwards about his family, my work etc seemed a worse betrayal than the sex.

He also sent me pics of himself, once when she was in the next room!

Think i have given myself bad relationship karma!

Some have been known to cnsider text sex, phone sex, msn sex as betrayal !! your thoughts red-queen??


i think that i would be more upset about a partner feeling emotionally attached to someone else rather than sexually

don't you think it's the lying that is the cheating...whether anything happens or not

if you are open and up front about your extra curricular then fair enough, if both are ok with it, but when you are sneaking around behind someone's back....that's what makes them feel stupid and betrayed and disrespected.

i'd rather hear the truth even if it hurts

well that's what i think anyway!!

What about non pyhsical contact...?

By this I mean flirting on messenger/email?

Sending of photos etc..

Engaging in a cyber session...

What are peoples thought's on this.

Would be interested to know what the general opinion is.

OK hypothetically speaking...

He has a one night stand with someone he never sees again


He has been meeting up secretly with another woman for 3 months; lunches, cinema, shopping etc, but nothing physical has happened

Which is easier to forgive????

For me the one night stand would be easier to forgive - because that is surely a spur of the moment thing.

Where as the 3 months is planned and in my eyes - deffo cheating.

Hi Naughty...is it secret or do you both know what the other is doing???

That is the issue for me

Hypothetical question RQ.


say the partner did not know then? Is that cheating...