I'm kinda curious Miss Bumfun - what sparked your interested in anal fun to start with?
I think it's a shame when one half of a couple isn't into anal when the other half is: usually it's the guy who's the keenie though! Also a lot of guys like yours are secretly more interested than they make out. Blokes tend to protest at the idea of having anything up their ass more from fear of being seen as having dodgy masculinity rather than genuine disinterest. As if they fear their girlfriends are going to ditch them and then tell their friends about the secret ass sessions. Maybe that's the barrier here. Any guy who has tried anal penetration properly will tell you - it feels great, especially with a bit of prostate massage thrown in.
How about you slip it into the conversation a few times about how much it turns you on, being with a guy who's masculine enough to experiment with anal pleasure...
Yeah, I will have to bring it up, will be better once we see each other more as we only have every other weekend while i do my studies so spend most of that time getting back into 'normal sex' i guess.
I think that when I was younger I always got turned on if a guy said he wanted to fuck my 'tight asshole' and it was more the idea than actually doing it, the forbidden element. I would always tell them that they couldn't (saving it for a rainy day I guess) and nobody ever pressed me on the subject opr even used a finger. Now I'm with someone who I have finally started experimenting with it has just naturally happened (plus they fingered me then wiped their finger on the duvet so I thought it best to use a topy to save them doing that)Although I say he talked me into it i kept suggesting it and bought some bum toys until he got the idea I enjoyed it. Then it went from there. I am going the right way though, have started using toys on him, getting closer to that 'area' and will probably be there eventually. It doesn;t help that I own a strap on (for an outfit) which I always use as a jokey threat as its massive, maybe that has sparked nervousness, I wouldn't suddenly peg him with it.
He is into anal, but he seems to prefer doing things to my bumhole whilst he penetrates my vagina or plays with it, scared he will hurt me perhaps. I'm sure more talking and gradually working on it will lead to my success.
I must confess to being a total hypocrite when it comes to anal... I love it when my guy does it to me, but if he wanted me to do it to him, I think I'd be a bit skeezed out by the idea. I'd do it, don't get me wrong... just the idea of it gives me the willies a bit.
I would agree that a good anal orgasm is certainly habit forming! I also agree, though, that you have to be really 'into' the idea to enjoy anal sex. I don't know if many women feel obliged or pressured to try it out with their boyfriends or husbands, but the decision should be yours and yours alone. Fear and/or disgust will only make the muscles clench and it will hurt more. As someone who has been experimenting with anal toys for a good few years now, I'd say start small and work up over weeks and months. Also some people are stretchier than others ; ) Try to work up to a toy about the same size as your partner, and once you can manage that without pain, then you are on your way. If you don't like it, then don't do it. Personally, I think silicone lube is the best kind, but see what works for you (KY is rubbish, don't even bother) As regards desensitising lube and amyl nitrate (poppers) both of these are very dangerous. The first will numb sensation (good and bad) and you could do yourself real damage without knowing. Don't go there, ever! The second is a drug that may make your muscles relax but also has the potential to make you feel sicj at best and at worst, can cause heart failure. Not worth the trouble, is it? In short, take it slowly, don't rush and build up to it. Anal sex is something to be handled carefully, and if you really don't like it, then DON'T do it. If your husband is a decent person, then he will understand and respect your wishes.
Ive just reviewed 2 sets of Anal Beads, they were my first anal toy and now I Love them. as does hubby. definatly a must for beginners,
Hi SC, couldn't agree more! Along with the OH, I'm pretty new to anal play (discovered a lot in the last few weeks! LOL!), and love my anal beads - they feel yummy! Like them so much that I've invested in a set of vibrating ones, and all I can say is wow!
Got a question - is it wrong to be curious about anal?
I was brought up very strict, tho ma did like to think she was pretty conservative about sex (she used to be a demonstrator for a sex catalogue) but I brought a lot of hang ups into my relationship cos of her.
Its only now (25 years on) that I am actually begining to enjoy sex. I have always enjoyed it, dont get me wrong, but to actually ENJOY it and to be thinking about it constant. I have always enjoyed receiving oral, but have shied away from giving (had to be cajoled into it) but now I cant keep my hands off him! Hes not complaining though.
But - since getting my vibrator two weeks ago, plus a multi-set thing, im getting more curious about other stimulation. Once hubby has slipped his finger in, had a little tickle, but I was tensed up and tho it was a pleasurable sensation we have never repeated it. (apart from an occasional misdirected penis we have never even discussed/tried anal sex).
Yesterday while brownsing through I started to read this thread and it got me thinking. Anyway, last night during having my clit aroused he slipped a finger towards my anus and started to gently rub. It was very pleasurable. I was in ecstasy!! But he stopped and said sorry - so i said nothing to be sorry for, so he gently carried on, thing is im not sure how much he actually penetrated as I was away with the fairies by this time!! How do I broach the subject?
So now Im sat here with the usual ache in my vagina and an unusual tingling in my anal area.....I wondering, is it wrong to want to try anal, should i suggest it to him, or should I just experiment myself to see if it is pleasrable, then if I do enjoy it - to allow it to happen? Which would be easy to arrange - as he LOVES my ass anyway, loves carressing it, biting it etc....plus the last 3 months I have lost a bit of weight and I know my ass is looking good!
My way of thinking is, if I experiment myself - thus 'stretching' that area, that if it does happen its not going to be painful. Advice/opinions please.
Got a question - is it wrong to be curious about anal?
I was brought up very strict, tho ma did like to think she was pretty conservative about sex (she used to be a demonstrator for a sex catalogue) but I brought a lot of hang ups into my relationship cos of her.
Its only now (25 years on) that I am actually begining to enjoy sex. I have always enjoyed it, dont get me wrong, but to actually ENJOY it and to be thinking about it constant. I have always enjoyed receiving oral, but have shied away from giving (had to be cajoled into it) but now I cant keep my hands off him! Hes not complaining though.
But - since getting my vibrator two weeks ago, plus a multi-set thing, im getting more curious about other stimulation. Once hubby has slipped his finger in, had a little tickle, but I was tensed up and tho it was a pleasurable sensation we have never repeated it. (apart from an occasional misdirected penis we have never even discussed/tried anal sex).
Yesterday while brownsing through I started to read this thread and it got me thinking. Anyway, last night during having my clit aroused he slipped a finger towards my anus and started to gently rub. It was very pleasurable. I was in ecstasy!! But he stopped and said sorry - so i said nothing to be sorry for, so he gently carried on, thing is im not sure how much he actually penetrated as I was away with the fairies by this time!! How do I broach the subject?
So now Im sat here with the usual ache in my vagina and an unusual tingling in my anal area.....I wondering, is it wrong to want to try anal, should i suggest it to him, or should I just experiment myself to see if it is pleasrable, then if I do enjoy it - to allow it to happen? Which would be easy to arrange - as he LOVES my ass anyway, loves carressing it, biting it etc....plus the last 3 months I have lost a bit of weight and I know my ass is looking good!
My way of thinking is, if I experiment myself - thus 'stretching' that area, that if it does happen its not going to be painful. Advice/opinions please.
I think your idea of self experimenting is a good start to anal play, this way you will know what you like and dont,
your starting of on the right foot with a finger, I would suggest maybe trying some anal beads, they are quite small and both of you could try them,
Got a question - is it wrong to be curious about anal?
I was brought up very strict, tho ma did like to think she was pretty conservative about sex (she used to be a demonstrator for a sex catalogue) but I brought a lot of hang ups into my relationship cos of her.
Its only now (25 years on) that I am actually begining to enjoy sex. I have always enjoyed it, dont get me wrong, but to actually ENJOY it and to be thinking about it constant. I have always enjoyed receiving oral, but have shied away from giving (had to be cajoled into it) but now I cant keep my hands off him! Hes not complaining though.
But - since getting my vibrator two weeks ago, plus a multi-set thing, im getting more curious about other stimulation. Once hubby has slipped his finger in, had a little tickle, but I was tensed up and tho it was a pleasurable sensation we have never repeated it. (apart from an occasional misdirected penis we have never even discussed/tried anal sex).
Yesterday while brownsing through I started to read this thread and it got me thinking. Anyway, last night during having my clit aroused he slipped a finger towards my anus and started to gently rub. It was very pleasurable. I was in ecstasy!! But he stopped and said sorry - so i said nothing to be sorry for, so he gently carried on, thing is im not sure how much he actually penetrated as I was away with the fairies by this time!! How do I broach the subject?
So now Im sat here with the usual ache in my vagina and an unusual tingling in my anal area.....I wondering, is it wrong to want to try anal, should i suggest it to him, or should I just experiment myself to see if it is pleasrable, then if I do enjoy it - to allow it to happen? Which would be easy to arrange - as he LOVES my ass anyway, loves carressing it, biting it etc....plus the last 3 months I have lost a bit of weight and I know my ass is looking good!
My way of thinking is, if I experiment myself - thus 'stretching' that area, that if it does happen its not going to be painful. Advice/opinions please.
Hi Naughty and welcome to the OA,
I can entirely sympathise with your history, as it sounds quite like mine - middle class upbringing in a fairly comservative house, coupled with a few unpleasant sexual events in my younger days, and bang! Hang-up Central here we came, Luckily I am now in a great relationship with a darling man, who has helped me open up and explore sex in a way I never have done before, and boy, am I enjoying myself!
Part of that exploration has been having a go at anal play and sex, something I was deeply opposed too, and never, ever thought I would do. I have to say that he was much the same! But thanks in large part to these fabulous forums, we have both rapidly overcome our hang-ups, and are now very much enjoying playing with each other's butts and discovering a whole new world of fabulous sensations and orgasms!
So, no, I wouldn't say it is in any way "wrong" to want to explore this part of your sexuality, particularly as you've enjoyed the little bit that has already happened. My advice would be to read as many of these threads as possible, and take on all the good advice that's out there. Use loads and loads of lube, take it slowly, and relax! I've also found using an anal douche like this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=952 helps set my mind at ease and makes me more happy that everything down there is clean! Again use a bit of lube to help ease things along, and use warm but not hot water.
If you want to explore yourself on your own, that's fine too. I actually found early explorations easier with my partner, but that was just how things worked out - I'm now having quite a lot of fun exploring on my own too!
Just remember, whatever you do, relax, take your time, don't do anything you aren't ready for, and have fun! Oh and LOTS of lube!External Media
I nearly keeled over with shock last night when I got home from work. Was stood up doing some laminating for my son and hubby walked past - gave me a kiss - but also grabbed my butt and tickled it - OMG! After all I had been thinking about all day, for him to do that........so, the rest of the hour waiting for son to go out was sheer agony as hubby had started me off again!
Anyways, after son had gone out we had a long and intimate chat. Told him about this forum and that I had been reading this thread. He was not shocked at all, amazed yes and he always thought I was against anything like that.
FW a few hours and during play he asked if I wanted to......so I said I wasnt against it, if it happended, it did.
So, the upshot of it is - we did not acheive full penetration with either finger (close tho) or penis - but I did get very aroused and when he entered me vaginally I was all fired up and horny as hell. The resulting orgasm was pillow bitingly good! (kids back home by this time)
So now I sat here, thinking.....shall I go have a play myself or not?
Go, play! It's not a big deal, you're overthinking it! Just another hole to play with, I say.
Naughty - listen to Shellyboo!
Shellyboo, that's a great attitude, and reduces all the worrying we do down to the realities! You are so right, it is just another hole to play in - woohoo!External Media
