Hello to everyone!
I've just been reading through a few posts before I posted here just to make sure that my "question" wasn't listed already.
Anyway, I'm having a bit of a problem like a lot of people on here. Me and my other half have been together for over 4 years and since my mum passed away in 2010, our sex life has gone out the window pretty much! It has affected our relationship quite a lot and my other half feels quite lost and frustrated I think. But towards the end of last year, it had started to pick up again. Not a lot but we were actually doing like foreplay and then sometimes had sex afterwards.
I personally don't think that my mum's passing is what is causing the problem I'm wanting advice about which I'll tell you about in a minute. I was greiving her for quite a while due to personal problems and I do agree that it affected my whole body but I now think that I am past that. I feel happier and I don't feel so depressed.
I started a new job in August last year, I do 41 and a half hours a week and I work with elderly people who have Dementia. Since I have started my new job, I have been shattered all the time! I do 12 hour shifts and the day is not ever easy. By the time I get home, I am barely holding my eyes open to eat my dinner that evening. Now the problem is that it's now affecting my sexual life. I think my other half is getting very stresed with the whole situation because we were talking about doing sexual things yesterday through text but we didn't do anything last night because by the time I got home I was shattered.
I still feel horny sometimes, mostly throughout the day but he is either working or I am working. If I do feel horny at night then he is most likely already asleep himself. Now I'll point out that I don't like to talk dirty through texts with him lately due to it not being fair that he's hoping to get something but then ends up not getting anything. He is the one that is always lately wanting to talk dirty but then gets quite frustrated at me when I end up telling him after a 12 hour shift that night that I would just like to sleep. If we do things or if I offer to help him masturbate then I normally end up falling asleep towards the end, not because I am bored and don't want to do it but because I can't physically stay awake any longer due to exhaustion.
I am stuck as to what to do now because so far, we haven't been able to have sex at all so far this year :( Before now, I had suffered from a UTI and Thrush, it wouldn't clear up and it was quite sore for some time so that is part of the reason for us not doing anything too! I get sore really easily so we can't just have "quickies" and I can't just be touched without any prior lubing or teasing due to the risk of getting sore. It's such a pain but I don't know what to do about it all.
Any help would be appreciated and sorry for the post being so long!