Hey
So im quite vanilla when it comes to the bedroom and he wants to start exploring abit more and one is dirty talk whilst we are having sex. Anyone got any advise on were to start ?
Hey
So im quite vanilla when it comes to the bedroom and he wants to start exploring abit more and one is dirty talk whilst we are having sex. Anyone got any advise on were to start ?
Hi and welcome @Beewoods It may be worth looking at the main LH site and follow the advice link, you may find something there. Good luck
There are quite a few topics on dirty talk, I think itâs a subject a lot if us (me included) feel awkward tackling so it would be worth doing a search of previous topics. This one, Whatâs your biggest âdirty talkâ turn on? is quite a good one for a read through though and also itâd be worth listening to the Podcast on How to Talk Dirty that Lovehoney did a while ago.
Hope they help! âŚIâm still no good at it though
By all means read all the other posts on this subject.
For me dirty talk is where I can become a different person with my husband. I tell him in the most crudest language what I want and how he should do it. I also compliment him on the size of his member and tell him how much I like it in me. Be imaginative and remember that this is between you and him behind closed doors where the crudest of words can be extremely arousing. So tell what you are going to do to him or what you want. Be as crude as you like Iâm sure that he will reciprocate.
With dirty talk usually itâs a good starting point to describe to him what your gonna do and throw in a few swear words with it lol
maybe even be a bit dominant by restraining him to the bed as well
@Beewoods you just have to let yourself go in that moment, this is an intimate moment between you and hubby so donât feel shy or ashamed of the things you say. Maybe compliment him on his technique then tell him what you want him to do to you. Itâs all about feeling comfortable and once you do youâll notice the confidence emerge at it. We donât use it every time, although on the times we do our orgasmic event is truly volcanic lol xx
love dirty talk - when me & the wife first started years ago she needed a bit of alcohol to remove her inhibitions but now its easy and very dirtyâŚ
My wife I very vanilla too. But after few drinks n in the right mood she does. Not necessarily deep stuff just like telling me to fuck her harder or cum inside me. Was in a bar the morning after a mates wedding and she whispered in my ear I want you to cut inside me later, all I could think of al day was getting her back to the hotel room. The sometimes the suttle things are the sexiest. Like one night she jus looked at me and said make love to me now or was fucking her from behind kissing her neck and she gently said fuck harder. Rarely she does it but itâs amazing when she does. Try the suttle things like that at first , when he not expecting it and go from there
Tell your partner exactly what you want to do to them, what you want them to do to you and how it all makes you feel. Be descriptive, I love crude words when it comes to dirty talk.
If it doesnât feel natural, try texting it first. Tell them youâre going to try out a few things to see how you feel saying/texting it and see how they feel receiving it.
Edited for spelling and to add the last few words.
I absolutely love being told what to do, itâs a very mild form of domination. Makes you feel like se is really horny and wants to just use you to make her cum
I love dirty talk as a form of teasing. Especially is it is done outside the bedroom and I have to wait, as my imagination will run wild as I think about exactly what OH is going to do to me. Once we have started how ever is a different story. I prefer OH to not dirty talk at this point as I then can find it difficult to focus on whatâs actually happening but instead focus on a fantasy in my own head. I can get a little overwhelmed this way.
The way I started was to just begin talking about what I am enjoying in the moment.
To go from no chat during sex to dirty talking during sex wonât happen over night! You need to build it up.
So I started by telling him how good he was at cunnilingus. Which bits were particularly enjoying. Where I wanted his hands/fingers etc.
How I loved feeling parts of him grow as I gyrated against him etc.
It took a while to build up to that but it soon took off after that
@Sehara I LOVE dirty chat outside the bedroom. I love a few cheeky sexts during the day too. Really gets the juices flowing
My mind is a wonderful, filthy place!
@Delightful87 having to make the dash to the bathroom to have an orgasm just so you can concentrate on your work when nothing but sex is on your mind
@Delightful87 thats the best way for a mind to be.
Thatâs the one @Dom624! Canât beat it!
Absolutely @Sehara. The world would be a boring place without it!
I find it quite difficult too sometimes, but I agree with the idea of, start off with little things. Describe whats happening and why you love it. Little one-liners are easy to start with like, âThats f*cking amazingâ, âKeep goingâ, âI love how that feelsâ⌠etc. With a few moans of pleasure in between helps as long as its genuine.
Then when you can do that, add in more things like what you want to happen next, âsqueeze my assâ, âplay with my nipples tooâ, âletâs switch positions, I want you to [insert position description]â.
If not comfortable saying it at first, start out with some sexting. A short message of âCant wait to finish work and get into bed with youâŚâ and describe what you want to do to eachother. That should build up the idea of dirty talk before stepping foot in the bedroom and feel more natural when you do start talking dirty in the moment.
Eventually it will feel less awkward!
Personally I think there is 3 levels of talking. 1) naughty talk- this I would class as basic I.e woman saying âgive it to meâ or deeper or harder. 2) dirty talk this would be intermediate like saying âfuck me harderâ or I want you to suck my cock. 3) filthy talk this is no limits anything goes including swearing, name calling etc⌠Thatâs my take on itâŚ
Remember guys its not just what you say itâs how you say it that makes all the difference!!!
@Delightful87 you donât have the problem of making sure you wipe up every bit of spunky you leave behind though!