That’s exactly what my friend said too and deep down I knew this was all true but I was trying to convince myself they was a genuine person only for the fact they had been lovely when they did talk and had much in common with me but who knows that could all have been fake waffle too…
I still can’t understand what their end game was and funnily managed to find out one of my kinda friends on the dating app knows of them and has Dias they did exactly the same thing to them and one of their other friends so they seem to think they got some issues
Yes I’d be exactly the same too as something like that will never be able to truly fix the trust in them again fully and that then tends to eat away into paranoia
@AJSTAR Unfortunately yes, you’re absolutely right. I realised that only earlier actually, while I was getting changed after my swim - I don’t miss him, I’m trauma bonded to him. I don’t miss him, I can’t shake what he put me through.
Ironically, it’s his abuse of me that inspired me to look after myself more. It’s true, we teach others how to treat us
People can be strange, they could enjoy messing people about as a kind of power trip/form of control, he could be bi-curious and suddenly gets cold feet etc. If your friend knows he has form for this behaviour, i think you had a lucky escape.
Hopefully you can put this behind you and feel better emotionally soon.
Kinda funny when we think on things and realise that trauma or even PTSD don’t always come from things that they get advertised with as in logics sense anything what has an impact on our lives has the ability to create a lasting traumatic experience.
Least now you can see that even with the bad there was a positive outcome to take from it and help better yourself as a wonderful person
Yeah definitely isn’t something right there with the whole experience and I’m starting to see it as a lucky escape and managing to feel balanced again inside myself but also have a sad sigh at the thought of having to start all over again again in finding someone else who will no doubt mess me about or try to use me…
Had a guy message me last night being really nice and I was thinking when will the penny drop and I ended up cutting the crap and asked for him to then say he’s in a relationship and his partner knows nothing lol
Oh quite I agree. and the flipside is also true: my new poly partner has somehow managed to turn my choice of post-swim changing cubicle into a new kinky ritual
Oh absolutely, you have to. Once you see where the bigger problem lies, you realise whose it is to deal with
Haha that saying always goes in my head and I used to stand by it years back until I realised maybe I needed to give an extra chance as not finding anyone decent at all
Fool me three times… get me some chocolate and a dildo?!
So it goes, I was at the pool last week and I noticed that the changing cubicles nearest the pool were slightly bigger - about four square feet extra space and a tiled, sealed shelf. So I thought you know, give myself a bit more room, I’d check them out after my swim. I grabbed up my stuff from the locker, headed to the changing area and I was chuffed as chips at how I’d arranged myself and had so much extra room, took a picture of it and sent it to my partners. My husband was impressed by my organisation, but my partner - who has a higher sex drive and is kinkier than my husband - said that the extra space and the solid shelf gave him sordid ideas. So now I can’t unsee it, and I keep taking myself back there just to think about it
