submissive_jojo wrote:
It is really about finding your sexual selves again. Which means you should be more open and risky. For example get a babysitter and go have some killer sex in the car parked in a secluded location. Or a quickey in the laundry room after the child is watching a television show for a few minuets or even while the baby is sleeping during nap time.
Put on a show for eachother, experiment, role play. Be EXCITING again.
Hope this helps x
+1.
It is so easy to fall into a rut of daily living that we don't make time for ourselves and partners especially after having kids.
I've got a 6-month old baby (my first) and we have a dog. I'm on Mat Leave now, and I intend to take the full year. OH works Monday-Friday 8:30-6pm, which isn't as long as some people work I realise...
He is usually tired after work, maybe mentally more than physically, and by the time he's walked dog, helped feed/bathe little one, had dinner and tidied up, all he wants to do is watch some TV to unwind before bed. He often falls asleep on the sofa, so I end up waking him up to get him to go to bed!
I've been trying to instigate more intimacy with him, and sex. Sometimes he's up for it, other times he just wants to cuddle. I try not to pressure him too much, but I do masturbate while he's at work most days.
I think a babysitter or a mini-break once in a couple of months, like 6-8 weekly intervals, would help you to recouple, figuratively, and literally!
Try giving her a massage with some candles, and use a nice smelling oil, or there are massage candles too where you can use the molten wax to massage. Run her a bath, just do some things without the expectation it will lead anywhere else initially. As she relaxes and gets out of mummy mode, she may start to feel more desire. And helping out with housework, occupying the kids for an hour while she does something for herself will all go a long way to making her feel appreciated.
Apologies for the long reply, but I think women sometimes need to feel cherished. Not saying you don't already do that with her, but maybe she needs it more often...You could also try getting her to read some erotic fiction once the kids have gone to bed. The mind is a powerful sexual organ. Perhaps more so for women.
Good luck rekindling your passion!