Hey everyone, I have enjoyed reading all the posts for ages but finally posting on here.
I have a new partner of 8 weeks, previously I was in a long term realtionship and we had a vanilla sex life.
My new partner is what I would call kinky already ive done positions and things never I’ve done. We have a night away coming up and I really want to wow him and surprise him and be a confident goddess but I am so self conscious, I’m a size 22 and previous relationship was mentally abusive so my confidence is at rock bottom. I want to be able to get all dressed up in my new lingerie and just walk out and enjoy but I know I will just want to hide under the covers! Also any good positions for plus sized tried and tested.
Thank you for the waffling on!
X
I’m a size 14 (more like 16) and hate my body size. I suggest trying to just be kind to yourself. Size doesn’t matter - grab some lovely LH stuff and just be YOURSELF.
My wife is a 22/24. We like the pretzel dip - it’s nice and deep and she loves it, as well as diggy style. Scoop me up or spooning is a enjoyable way to warm up.
We just do what is comfortable and enjoyable.
I’ve been a size 22 at my biggest and also suggest cowgirl and doggy positions. I have a friend who is a size 34 and she does the same. We’ve both been through more than our fair share on tinder too, so don’t let your confidence hold you back darling. Embrace your curves.
I was exactly the same. My previous relationships were very abusive - mentally, physically and emotionally.
When I got with hubby, I literally had zero confidence. But over time, I learnt to believe what he says, that he actually does find me attractive and sexy in whatever lingerie I wear.
I started off with babydolls and teddies. Over time, when I my confidence grew, I tried different ranges of lingerie. Now, I have a wide variety of lingerie.
Have a look on their website and see what takes your fancy. Just take the plunge and do it. I’m so glad that I did, it’s definitely improved our sex life.
Body stockings always look great. Embrace what you have. You’ve already done stuff you haven’t done before and he is obviously well in to you. Enjoy your weekend away and have fun
I love that you’re embracing the adventure. I know that its easy to say to not let your body stop you but think of it this way, you’re 8 weeks in and he’s not run away. See! He loves your body!
I’m a similar size and my sexual partner loves to see me dressed in lingerie and I can confidently say that he loves my body dressed or undressed. I hated lingerie and sold or gave away all but a few bits before we met, we were chatting at the time and he asked me to keep some of it. I didn’t, but I did buy new stuff. The lingerie I had bought previously was what I thought was supposed to look sexy, and was what other people thought was sexy but it wasn’t for me. Then I worked out what I did think was sexy on me and now I love wearing lingerie for me and for him.
And when someone is very vocal about loving your body and their words and actions match, its hard to hold on to insecurities. I think it was the 3rd or 4th time we were having sex and he reached for the cocoa butter to moisturise my belly, I was horrified but now I don’t hold back.
This is a good position, it gives the deepness of doggy bit still allows for eye contact, this is one of my favs. But have a look at this Positions of the week thread, its got loads of different positions, click on any that look interesting and it’ll give you more info on it.
My favourite position too.
Can still hold a bullet on her clit, or reach for her breasts and play with her nipples… and she often manages to get an arm up and torture one of mine for my delight. I love cuming in that position too!!!
I’m also a size 22 and struggled with this greatly at the begining of my relationship with my boyfriend. What helped me was the fact my boyfriend also has some body confidence issues. He’d mention something he was self conscious about and I’d just be completely baffled because, to me, he’s gorgeous! Made me appreciate he doesn’t see my body the way I see it just as I don’t see his the way he sees it.
If your new partner is coming back for more than they obviously like what they’re getting! The only real cure for this is just go for it. Let go as much as you possibly can and just enjoy each other. The more you do it, the easier it gets, promise!
@Laylapie … Allow me to let you in on a secret.
The most sexy outfit you can wear, is the skin you are in.
But before it can have the sexually arousing effect, you have to wear it with confidence.
Walk out like you are on a catwalk and strut your stuff.
Let me assure you, he will be kbocked out, because body confidence is the most sexy thing on the planet.
Love your body and he will love it with you.
Make your night away , be one to remember. Show him your kinky side, by throwing any inhibitions away and letting him see you have a few things to knock him sideways.
Let your alter ego take over and do what ever takes your fancy.
You are after all, a gorgeous curvey sex godess.
Please let us all know how you had him in your palm.
ENJOY.!!
@Laylapie - just show him love and he will show it back to you
Sounds like you guys are off to a great start anyhow - seems like he wants to be with you!
Ask him what his fantasies are?
Sexy conversations make sex sexier! (for me anyhow)
Hope you have a wonderful time.
You are so much more than a measurement - the love I have for my wife is about so many other things
@Laylapie - body confidence is a struggle for most. My oh is a plus size and is obsoletely beautiful. 8 weeks together, their has to be some kind of attraction. Live each day to its fullest and be happy. Enjoy your get away.
Wow!I like you are embracing your new found sex life.Lots of new kinky stuff too so he obviously fancies you like mad and is well pleased.The LH lingerie fits and looks great on larger sizes too,i should know as i’m a larger male who wears nothing else.Get your LH basque and stockings on and go for it as i’m sure he’ll be blown away as i am sure you will be full of confidence and feeling great.Well Done
Firstly I would like to say as a partner of a larger lady her body size has never been an issue for me at all. I love everything about her and if anything I try as much as possible to get her to love herself much much more.
We have been together over 25 years and had 3 kids so you can imagine how much her body has changed. She has always been self conscious. It took many years of reassuring her to finally get her to realize I would find her sexy if she was a size 6 or a size 30.
She now wears body suits, g-strings, thongs, crotchless teddys amongst other stuff and when she does put them on it is such a turn on.
Forget the media images that we are told are normal when most of them are photo shopped and love what and who you are! Believe me the right person will find you sexy no matter how you look.
As for positions you really can not go wrong with cow girl or reverse cow girl (my own personal opinion)
Congrats on starting your own recovery and healthy journey with confidence and satisfaction.
I have found positions have more to do with flexibility and personal enjoyment. For example some woman may love bending while standing, regardless of size, but then if other have tight hamstrings that is uncomfortable. For doggie some like to be up on their knees while others sit back on their feet… while others are uncomfortable in that position. So it really is anything that hits the spots you enjoy… and dont be afraid to try a bunch and change often…
In my opinion being vocal and giving feedback in the moment is way more important than the perfect plan or position…
Hope that helps
My partner is a similar size and very body conscious. This means even if she wears sexy undies for me she hides under the covers. I find her sexy and I tell her that but she just stubbornly says that she doesn’t feel and nothing I say will change that! Any tips how I can appreciate herself and understand that she is damn hot?
but now I don’t hold back.
I have in my head what I want to do/look like but it’s just having the confidence to do it. X
