Premature Ejaculation

Bit of a sensitive subject this one but my boyfriend suffers from premature ejaculation. We have discussed it and it’s all fine with me but it really gets him down and he is embarassed about it. We have tried some things like delay sprays, the condoms to slow him down etc. but he still cums very quickly. He is at the point where he is thinking of going to discuss it with the GP to see if there is anything else to do. Does anyone have any advice, men who also have the same issue or women with partners that suffer from this?

Perhaps you could try controlling him, perhaps blindfold him and tie him up. Play with him bringing him close, followed by denial. Give your partner confidence. Might work might not but worth it try. :kissing:

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Hi @newbiejen have you tried for him coming more than once in a session? For partners able to go a 2nd time , 2nd time was normally longer :comet: :comet:. Also depends what you mean by quickly :timer_clock:. I’ve experienced it immediately after entry, after a couple of thrusts and after a minute but the other end of the spectrum has been less fun too :yawning_face: :frowning: See if you think any of these ideas or any of these from previous topics may help.
Sea :ocean:

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Hi @Sea :slightly_smiling_face:

Just a heads up, you don’t need to sign each of your posts as your username and profile picture are included in every message. :+1:

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@newbiejen i think a lot of guys have worries about this, i know i do, the worry can be really distracting and affect your connection so you’re doing the right thing in trying to address it head on.
I find it’s very random and sometimes i can last as long as i would like and feel in full control but sometimes it’s the opposite.
Like @Sea says, and i would agree, if he can cum a second time after maybe 20-30 mins just get him off quickly to start with and then keep playing together and build up to having sex when he is hard again, reaching climax quickly can sometimes be a blessing and everyone is different so stay close and find your own way together.

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The Fleshlight Stanima Training Unit actually made me last longer over time.

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If it’s a case of it just feels so good (because, you know, it really does :slightly_smiling_face:) then I find more sex helps. When Mrs Chimp had the twins we didn’t have sex for quite a while, and then when we did it just felt so super awesome I was done as soon as I slipped it in. :slightly_smiling_face: But regular sex gave me my stamina back after not too long, and condoms helped bridge the gap (still do, if I’m honest :slightly_smiling_face:).

Edging can also help. It’s basically where he stimulates himself right up until he’s just about to cum, and then completely stops touching himself (or using a toy) until he’s calmed down. And then keep repeating that for as so long as he can/has time for. With practice that can give you more awareness and control of when you’re going to cum, and then you can ease off and have a breather if everybody’s not ready yet. :+1::slightly_smiling_face:

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Couldn’t agree more with ian_chimp both of these helped me out with this sensitive subject and made mine and my partners sex life so much better

(The more he jerks the longer it works)
(The more you ride the longer he’ll be inside)

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I think it’s safe to say he’s definitely not alone and needs reassurance.

It’s very difficult to compare your own performance to that of another person. Sure we would all love to go on for hours like we see in so many videos but that’s not me reality.

I find regular masterbation helps or do that in the morning with the main event at night.

After foreplay, I focus on my OH first and ensure she gets her pleasure before I let myself go.

This is a very sensitive subject and affects so many things in life. I have had some experience with this subject and I have a book to recommend in addition to all the other delay methods.
The books focuses on the pelvic muscles that we all use to hold and stop having a wee. With some very simple exercises it improves control and can increase the strength of your orgasms because they build up more. This can be done day both men and women.
The book is called and it really helped me.

The Multi-Orgasmic Man

Good luck and don’t worry about it that also can affect it.

Hi I suffer from prem ej I went down the medical route got referred to hospital. Prescribed EMLA cream which will numb the sensation and he will last longer. It worked for me. Think you can also buy on line. You apply 10 mins before sex.

Well he did decide to discuss with the GP last week and they were very helpful. They mentioned a few things to try including squeeze technique, a cream to try and also making sure he has cum 30 mins to and hour before we get down to things. They also mentioned some anti-depressant medication can be used to slow down his excitement, orgasm and ejaculation if other things don’t work.

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I would just be carful with the antidepressants as much as they do work they can become very addictive

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Just think of something unpleasant like work, it worked for me when i was young and trigger happy!

There is a subreddit (/r/prematureejaculation) that is a supportive community for men to share advice. It’s better to hear the experiences of real people rather than some dude trying to sell you his secret method to last 12 hours in bed. Many users on there have adopted some kind of masturbation training and/or pelvic floor exercises, and will share what has worked for them.

There’s no easy cure but people do experience improvements with hard work and dedication.

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I think a lot of people overlook physical condition , it can have a major effect on performance . The other basic is how often you have sex ? When I was in great shape and had sex maybe 10-16 times a week , I could stay hard and not cum for pretty much as long as I wanted . Now in so so shape and never having penetrative sex , I could almost cum being touched . As I have told guys over the years , practice practice practice !

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I can second this! Looking back on my fitter days I’m quite impressed at how well I used to perform!

I dont think I’ve suffered from full premature ejaculation but to help out I once purchased a small spray from LH called ‘Dragon Delay Spray’ (Not sold anymore i dont think) and boy did it work. The active ingredient was lidocaine (oddly the same as in my kids teething gel!), and whilst initially it did go fully numb, after a short while you do get some sensation back and its so great to be able to continue for a long time.

Other delay creams I’ve felt havent really worked although my skin is tanned (indian) so would possibly have an impact.

Years ago we tried several prolonging creams . We found that it number her much more than me , which kind of defeated the purpose . Years ago we played with Viagra and it worked quite well . Friends at work told me to get 100mg and cut them down to whatever dose I needed because the pills cost the same per pill . A 10mg the same as 100mg.I found a quarter , 25mg was very good . One day I took 50 and we almost wore out my cock and her pussy . When I did cum , the volume and velocity was the most I every produced .

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I’ve suffered with this in the past, it’s definitely easier if you can talk about it so it’s not a ‘big thing’. I’d agree with others about going for a second round and practice, practice, practice. The more frequently you have sex the quicker he’ll learn to gain control.

I didn’t find any creams really made a difference. What I did find though was that giving my partner an orgasm before any PIV sex took some pressure off and as I was more relaxed I lasted longer. Her second/third orgasms also seemed easier for her so we had a better chance of finishing together. If I got close to orgasm then I’d stop and continue with oral until the urge had subsided or just switch positions. Straight thrusting is the quickest way for me to cum and the way that sex is often shown in porn so slow it down a bit, grind or sort of rock so that his penis puts pressure on your g-spot with slower thrusts. If you are on top then hopefully you can direct him to hit the right spots and also leave his hands free to tease your clit, breasts bum or whatever else you enjoy so that you get closer to joint orgasms. Once he has orgasmed and if you still have a need get him to carry on pleasuring you in other ways. I certainly enjoy making my partner cum and it makes me feel good about myself even it it wasn’t PIV that hit her spot.

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Just an update for anyone this may help struggling with premature ejaculation. My boyfriend tried a few things but eventually went with the GP’s suggestion of trying Sertraline as the other things didn’t work. After 2-3 weeks he noticed a big difference and his usual 2 minutes is now 15-20 minutes which is great for us both and he is much happier with this.

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