Here's my issue and I hope people can understand and offer advice.
I like my tech and I think hard about what to buy. Last year I bought a laptop. No biggy in itself but that I went high end and I'm still paying off the credit card bill now. In itself it wasn't an impulse buy as I had really done my research reading articles online and countless reviews, comparing specs and prices over and over again. This got to the point I was getting ratty with people and even not sleeping well.
My solution was to go out and buy it on credit card. I couldn't stand pontificating any longer so my logic was once i'd bought the bugger the torture could stop. Which it completely did, I'm utterly in joy every time I use it.
Now ( thanks for reading thus far ) I recently promised my wife I wouldn't do this again. I said I'd pay off my credit card bills and save up for a new desktop. We don't need it desperately but the old one is getting long in the tooth and support for it will end next year.
Trouble is I'm doing exactly what I did last year. I am reading articles obsessively , making countless calculations of how much per month and tweaking spec options on the website. I even thought of paying for it on finance.
It's really frustrating the hell out of me that to save for it it'll likely take a year but I know I could have it tomorrow on card. I'm lucky to be paid well so I know I can pay back any option but I think that by the time I save there will be a new one out and the research would start all over again.
I know it's pathetic and I hate myself for it as I'm bloody lucky I don't have bigger worries in the world BUT I'm am torturing myself.
I want to be loyal to my word but how do I change my mindset from have it now to enjoy it later. A year of saving just seems so dull and boring.
It may help to know that I come from a poor upbringing ( money wise ) and since getting on good money have never hesitated to just buy up front without saving.
Sorry for rambling and thanks for any personal experiences and advice that might help.
Stick at it and give your credit cards to your wife or someone your trust.
As a discharged bankrupt, I know how you feel about buying and thinking saving was boring. I used buying as an outlet for stress and depression in the past and will never really be free of the fact I blew so much money on bags, shoes, technology, cars...(if you want impulsive, I once blew £2000 in a day booking a last minute flight to NYC, a hotel and shopping there) all because I knew the funds were on the cards..now i think what a silly b**** .... ive never been so thankful for having no debt or credit cards although it gets frustrating at times!
I earn great money and still struggle so have learned the hard way but to be honest treating yourself a little isnt a crime, just think more about owning it outright rather than having to pay it in bits (interest is nasty!)
So my advice.... hide the cards its ok to look and decide what you'd like to get but remember knowing you've bought it outright and dont owe money every month/have to pay more on your cards will make you so much better in the long run :)
I buy things on my cards occasionally because 'I don't want to wait' but rarely is it an impulse buy so I can't advise on that side of things.
But what I would say is you promised your wife you wouldn't do it again and it would be a shame to rack up the debt on an expensive credit card. IF and I stress IF they did a 0% finance offer then I would consider it.
The other compromise is to start saving and perhaps half card, half cash if you truly cannot wait but resist temptation, stop looking at things you don't need at this time and give your cards to your wife.
Well, I do agree with occhiverdi to give the card to your wife I think. I do have limited funds, so I know how hard it is sometimes to stand my ground not to buy more. I think if you buy a smallish thing on impulse (I sometimes do earrings, or I bought here my first vibrator - the Lady Lustfinger, so no big deal), its ok to treat yourself, but dont think doing it with big things is a good way to go. I do save for those, even for months, or sometimes I use money I get for birthday etc (thats how I got my Mia). But I do montly calculations as to what I spent it on, how much I have, what I have spare etc. And then I look if I want something which would fit the spare money.
Alternatively you can seek some help. if you think you may be in trouble and this may repeat.
I'm not really sure I can help because I've always been very good with money and curbing things I want....if there's something I really want I find it quite easy to wait until christmas or my birthday and ask a few people to club together. I'm generally very good with money.
But - maybe trying to turn it into something positive?
I was recently bought one of these for a pressie http://www.terramundi.co.uk/ and they're great - stick to only putting £2 coins in and you can fit a grand in the "normal" sized ones plus it makes the saving up positive. If you're just separating a portion of your funds in an e-banking account then it's easy to feel like you're getting nowhere. You feel like you're actively doing something, get excited about what you're putting in and if you want to save quickly you could always put notes in too (keep a tally of notes and not coins then you know the jist of what you've saved but you may get a pleasant suprise when you smash it wth the coins). I'm saving for my wedding dress with mine.
You'll get there in no time and you'll feel such a sense of satisfaction when you get there!
Plus if you pick a computer you really like now then don't look for a few months - when you do have the funds you can be chuffed with a bargain (if you stick with the same one) or be pleased that you're getting more value for money if you pick a more advanced model!
Hope some of this makes sense.....problem with debt is no matter how sensible you are, it can be a slippery slope (as you've already begun to encounter - by wanting a second thing after the "one time only").
agree with the others. give your credit card to your wife, or pay off all the balance on it and cut it up!
Debit is definatley the way to go if you have trouble budgeting, you can't spend what you don't have with a debit card.
It may seem silly but have you considered a pre pay card? if you are really struggling to save you could put your "entertainment" money for the month onto one - and when it's gone, it's gone.
Buying a Desktop now may seem like a good thing, but think of the technology advances and how much more tech for your money you will be able to get this time next year.
Why are you researching now if you're looking to buy in a year when specs and prices will be different? If you can figure out that piece, you might be able to short circuit this all process.
Understanding the actual costs of 'deals' and borrowing is a good demotivator for some people (well, it is if they take it seriously). Have you calculated how much buying on credit increased the real price of your computer? Or how much closer you'd be to your new goal if you didn't have interest payments?
Have you set up a dedicated savings account specifically for this goal? That alone can help since you can see it progress month by month. A substantial amount to be saved over a year is perfect for fixed deposit savings accounts which tend to attract higher interest rates. In other words, you could be earning instead of paying interest.
So in a year, you have a fancier computer, no credit card stress AND some extra money. Won't that be worth the wait? Years go by so quickly.
If I cut up my credit cards I will have failed to control 'myself'. My wife controls so much ( probably too much perhaps of my life ) and I don't want to submit to this as well. I'd feel humiliated. Also I use my credit card pretty often to pay for fuel as I find it a handy way to trace spending ( I put the money straight in online to pay this off ).
rose hip wrote: Why are you researching now if you're looking to buy in a year when specs and prices will be different? If you can figure out that piece, you might be able to short circuit this all process.
once i worked out my options i drove myself mad with configuring it. then once settled thought ' right how much do I need to save a month then?' only to discover I was looking at a year most likely.
I think I know what I need to do. I need to make a start. Once I do I may feel better. Perhaps if I think - 'thats the keyboard payed for ' etc it might help visualise some progress?
If I cut up my credit cards I will have failed to control 'myself'. My wife controls so much ( probably too much perhaps of my life ) and I don't want to submit to this as well.
it is controling yourself though, you control it by not having the temptation there. Others who have problems with things, like alcaholics ( though it's not the same in this situation, it's just an illustration) don't keep a bottle of beer around because they need to control themselves, they use self restraint and remove the temptation to make it doubly effective.
If I cut up my credit cards I will have failed to control 'myself'. My wife controls so much ( probably too much perhaps of my life ) and I don't want to submit to this as well. I'd feel humiliated. Also I use my credit card pretty often to pay for fuel as I find it a handy way to trace spending ( I put the money straight in online to pay this off ).
rose hip wrote: Why are you researching now if you're looking to buy in a year when specs and prices will be different? If you can figure out that piece, you might be able to short circuit this all process.
Might seem like a silly suggestion but put your card in an envelope and seal it up. Then sign it or get your wife to put a funny face on it or something like a 'seal'.
Yes, you could easily rip open the envelope but then you'll have broken the seal and you're going to learn to not want to break the seal.
I did this years ago as I didn't want to give in and rip the damn envelope. It was proving to myself that I could do it and resisting the temptation but still having it there for an emergency!
Hiya BP, sorry to hear you're struggling with this.
Here's a couple of ideas - get hold of some year-old computer magazines or price lists. Compare what you could have bought then with t he budget you're planning on spending now. Project that difference a year into the future... your new computer's going to be so much better than the ones around today!
Also, consider that when you've saved the price of a new computer it'll be brand new. When you've paid off the price of a loan your shiny new gadget will be old and obsolescent. Dusty. Covered in greasy fingermarks. Eeeuugghhhh. Am I helping?
Have you looked at other ways of saving? Local Credit Unions may be able to help you with a savings account that's easy to access, or provide a reasonably-priced loan with no catches. Credit cards have many advantages, but often they're tricky to manage.
Yeh this could work as all the sales guff could be turned around in my head to think 'well this one's ok but next year it'll be even better. Maybe 25% faster etc etc'
I do like the fact that the base model is almost good enough for if it just had more hard drive space but next year who knows eh?
I really want to experience buying something outright and not thinking 'well I'll pay it off as fast as I can' then find that other stuff gets in the way and that's a lot slower than planned.
I know it can be difficult but I really hope you can hold out!
The only money I spend that isn't already in the bank is the mortgage on my house. If you can stick to it you will save SOOOO much money in the long run on interest etc.
You've got to ask yourself what this new PC will really give you. If its more disk space, then you can but a 2TB disk to put in your existing PC for £80. More memory? Faster processor? All cheap if you buy bit by bit.
What does your old PC not do that the new one will?
In my case it would be working graphic card driver lol. Really need to sort this problem I have with my 5 years old laptop (cannot buy a new one), today the screen saver went on in 6 small windows and after that part of the screen went black and I know its the graphic card driver failing *grrrr*
Much faster processor ( quad core vs current single core ) better operating system ( as I discovered with my laptop ) , better screen more RAM and more.
Oh and much much quieter.
So all wholesale upgrade does make more sense.
It's not essential at the moment as it's working fine. After chatting and saving a bit the urge is dying and so far today I've not read one more review or looked at specs page.
The interest thing is really hitting home. I have played about with money in bank to my advantage today and whilst discussing with the bank found out I'm paying £100 a month in interest on my car loan! Chuffing hell. This crap has to stop!
Hey BigPoppa, duno if am much help as i only ever buy things outright. Still tho sounds like you've woke up and smelt the coffee (as it were). my problem is my compulsive buying from love honey, which I have calmed down (read stopped) now. I just come straight to the forums now instead of looking at new toys i don't really need - blimey i really do have plenty!!
Anyway good luck with your saving but please remember you're not the only one! I may not use/have or want a credit card but even so I ain't the best at saving. :( D69x