I find it difficult to turn my girlfriend on :( she wont tell me what does and i dont know either so :( yeah
Its making me really sad :(
Have you ever spoke to your girlfriend about it and told her how its making you feel? as that would be my first suggestion.
Have you tried to introduce some soft porn or even a film with an erotic scene and see if that gets a reaction?
Well no but i have never considered that because she doesnt like me watching porn Lol so i dont think her watching it with me would help....and yes i spoke to her about it :( and she tells me i do turn her on but i dont feel i do and she doesnt show it and :( maybe im just being stupid :(
erotic films are different to porn in the way that its acted etc and dont come across as sleazy, certain scenes in some films really work for me and use to before I started to like porn,
body of evidence is a good one, and sliver
hmmm :( ok
body of evidence william defoe and madonna i use to have that on vhs
Mini-salad wrote:
Well no but i have never considered that because she doesnt like me watching porn Lol so i dont think her watching it with me would help....and yes i spoke to her about it :( and she tells me i do turn her on but i dont feel i do and she doesnt show it and :( maybe im just being stupid :(
Maybe it's a problem with your expectations rather than her behaviour then? How do you feel she should "show it"? Contrary to what porn would have us believe, not all women are writhing, panting sex fiends when they're turned on! Not saying that you're totally wrong, you could be right - but maybe she just doesn't show arousal in the way you expect?
Ive only recently become a horny little minx, and hubby was never reasured before that I was fully turned on even though I was which I found made him feel inadequate and if he wasnt doing enough, It was all a confidence thing for me.
Maybe she dont have the confidence to show you how turned on she really is, but it dont mean she isnt turned on just that she dont show it.
sorry im crap with advice but I try lol
Listen to these girls mini-salad, they know their stuff!
Although it is all about communication, the biggest thing for us ladies is that when we feel self-conscious for whatever reason, we lose our asbility to BELIEVE we can be attractive hence shunning you lads when you are trying your best to convince us of the opposite.
Just persevere with genuine comliments, being very attentive ALL day, not just when sex is on the agenda, lots of eye contact, hugging, kissing for no reason than that she is gorgeous.
Let her feel her way when she is more responsive but don't get too frustrated if she blows hot and cold. Us women are fickle creatures! A woman can goes from 10 to 0 in a few overthinking steps......'Wow, he really is turned on by what I'm wearing tonight, I feel really sexy. But it is a little big tight. When I take it off you are going to see where it has cut in. Why did I eat that packet of biscuits? I look awful in this, I feel crap tonight. Get away from me, I feel like crap, can't you tell? Why are you even bothering?
And that will all be in her head, just a few nanoseconds of spiralling thought!
Alas, c'est vrai!
Depending on your relationship you could also try writing down how you feel. How you want to make her happy, how you want HER, not just more sex. Try not to make it sound like a critism of her or her behaviour in any way or that will be counterproductive. And it is soooooo romantic.
Good luck honey! We are complex creatures and fools to ourselves. If your only motivation is that you love and want her, you are more than half-way there.
Now if men were such complex creatures, there would be a coital crisis!
(Teasing guys - I know that some of you can be as deep, thoughtful and wonderfully complicated as us fab females)
Ahem, enough said. I'll keep digging ;-)