I'm in a LDR, and often sext with the OH, both sending pictures. Last week he sent me one that's had me worrying since. I noticed a small lump on the shaft of his penis, that I've not noticed before. I'm not seeing him for a while yet, so can't wait till next see him to check while I'm down there and bring it up face to face, which would be the more sensitive thing to do. We don't skype, do phone calls, only text in the inbetween periods.
How can I make sure my OH is okay without coming out with something potentially rather hurtful like "I think there is something wrong with your penis?"?!
I don't really think there is anyway to approach such a subject. Like you said your gonna have to wait to see it in person. During foreplay try and get a good look at it. Do you trust him? Would you ever think he could cheat and that the lump could be something to be concerned about? Because if that's your concern then make sure you don't have unprotected sex if there is something there that your not sure about.
Oh and I kinda know how freaky it is, because a few years back I found a lump on my partners testicle. It turned out to just be a cyst which is what your partner could have. So try not to think the worst x
What NN said. Although if you really want to bring it up with him you could try your luck with a super casual approach, saying you were watching some medical programme last night and they stressed the importance of check ups, checking your own bits etc. it could be nothing more than a vein sticking out more than usual, but it could be something serious for him and for you so be safe xx
I trust him not to cheat. It really killed the moment for me cause I saw it and a hundred things it could be starting running through my mind, but I could hardly say, whoa, hold up, lets take a look at that! I might try that Miss Char, just because it could be more than a month before I see him, and I don't want this on my mind the whole time. I may try the "watched a program that talked about checking your body, and said it's good practise to check your bits and remind your partner to do the same, so consider this your remind". He knows I watch a lot of sex documentaries so I think I could get away with it... Thank you :) Been having a mini freak since friday worrying about what to do!
I disagree with you ladies - you should tell him straight away.Prostate cancer is a very real thing, though not as much in the media as breast-cancer. If my girlfriend told me 'I think something might be wrong and you should have it checked out' I'd be grateful?
I think I was more getting at the way to bring it up, which is what miss k asked. Not everyone takes that kind of topic easily! I appreciate the seriousness of all cancers but I also know that some people can be difficult/offended by outright questions even when coming from those close to them and a caring place. :) x
Bit the bullet and just went for it. He said he checks every week, and just checked and says everything is fine...must have just been the photo, they aren't always a true picture of how things are.. :)
I am so relieved to have got that off my chest, thank you guys xx
So much better CC! Problems with lumps and cancer are huge in my family, I'm not sure I've got enough fingers for how many fam members have battled it in the years I've been old enough ot understand. So it's very much something I'm overly cautious about. As it turns out he remembered this and humoured me by taking me seriously :) x
Looks like I am too later to offer advice but I am glad you guys got it sorted and your mind is now at rest.
I was going to say, if you noticed a lump on his penis, I would be willing to hedge my bets that he may already know about it. I know this is not always the case but they see it a lot more than us, every time they pee and masturbate and shower, and constantly fiddle with it all dayyyy.....
Ahem lol
But if you ever see something new, never be afraid to mention it tactfully, it is for your own sexual health too at the end of the day. Plus, I think some people can tend to ignore things that scare or worry them and just hope it goes away. Better to get things checked sooner xx
Fluffbags, I had though of that but it would be the underside as he looks at it (artful photo ;) ) so didn't feel comfortable assumoing he'd seen it! But much happier now it's been sorted, thanks guys :) Someone actually commented at work today that I seemed happier/less stress...seems I really was getting worked up over it!
It's good Missy K, you are worried about your OH, its perfectly natural. In fact it would be strange if you was not. I think always be safe rather than sorry. Kiss
