Boyfriend has kept erotic photos of ex, is this normal!?

Hello lovely people!
Looking at photos with my boyfriend on his phone, a erotic near naked picture of his ex pops up! I would never keep this kind of photo of my ex and trying not to overanalyse why he has but wish I hadn’t seen this or even better wish he had deleted them! Mmmm thoughts please?

1 Like

Could genuinely have forgotten to delete it?
Tend to agree though that any photos of exes I delete.

Hello :wave:

That does not sound good, but as said above it could have been a mistake.

Good point - he did say he doesn’t tend to look through his timeline and delete.

1 Like

If there were quite a few then I would think it was more of a pattern, but I guess the odd one can slip through quite easily.

1 Like

Did he delete it when you saw it?

I wouldn’t actively go back through my photos to delete ones that had my ex in them so he might’ve just genuinely forgot/not thought about it. But if he was gonna refuse to delete it or wanting to keep them then that’s not cool :heart:

3 Likes

Thanks lovelies.

I think he’s just not thought about it and he tried to reassure me. Our relationship is great so I’m trying to not make a big deal of it but that’s hard for me! Think I’ll try to let it go and trust him. In my younger years I would have been so jealous and hurt but trying to see the bigger picture (no pun intended!) x

4 Likes

I accidentally saved some pics I shouldn’t have to the cloud once. I only noticed it months later when I’d deleted them from my phone. Luckily no one noticed but me! It’s possible it was this same in this case.

3 Likes

Hi @HornyAlex I think I’d go by his reaction. Was he embarrassed? Defensive? Blasé?
Very possible it was just left there forgotten, not hidden as he would probably have been more careful that you wouldn’t see it.

2 Likes

Not defending in any way - but my photo timeline is huge abd a mess - and I couldn’t tell you what was there on not if you asked me - so I’m pretty certain if I scrolled through them all there would be some photos I’d forgotten were there…however in my case it’s probably just going to be random pictures I’d have sent to my missus while she was away for work (not naked pics…probably photos of me covered in baby puke or photos of dog poo (my boy dog still prefers to sh1t in the conservatory if it’s cold or raining). So would still be photos that if anyone else was looking through would still think was odd! That said I’ve taken sexy photos of my exes before but I’ve made sure they were all deleted…

So hopefully it’s just a mistake - if it’s been saved into a folder or grouped together then alarm bells would ring…as per most things on here - just talk it out with him…

1 Like

Thanks he was embarrassed and tried to over explain. I’m reassured it’s ok now and think he’s just not thought to delete x

2 Likes

When me and hubby first moved in together I found an old video of his ex doing a burlesque dance on his pc (which became our pc). I was really shocked he still had it (had been a few years since they split) and he said he forgot it was there. He deleted it there and then and apologised I’d had to see it. If he’d been more defensive I think I would have worried more, but as he had just forgotten (and I believed that from his demeanour) it wasn’t a problem after that! So maybe he has just forgotten he had it

1 Like

Hey @HornyAlex There’s been some great input already, it could be a genuine mistake that he has forgotten about, if so then I wouldn’t think much of it, we do things with people we’re with, move on, and sometimes forget about these things.
From what you’ve said about his reaction, it sounds like a genuine oversight on his part and it’s nothing more, and it’s great that you both discussed it, communication here is the best thing! :heart:

1 Like

I understand you may not have appreciated that…

But he may as well have the right to keep them?
I never taken naughty pics before, but I’d imagine that past good times would be mine to own and decide what to do with?

Wouldn’t necessarily mean anything. I occasionally think about the sex I’ve had with ex girlfriends, and enjoy the reminiscing. It doesn’t mean I’m wanting it again, I’m very happy with my wife.

I understand it could make her feel insecure, I don’t discuss it with her, I’m incredibly happy with her, but equally happy with some of my past.

I think I’d be mortified if she saw some pics of my exes though. And wouldn’t want to see hers.

I am someone who doesn’t go through and delete.
It’s not that I want to keep them, I just have better things to do.
He may just have kept the as he hasn’t deleted, rather than wanted to keep them.

It makes me uneasy to think about if my partner has naughty photos of his exes and if he looks at them, I’d rather they were deleted. I think it’s a bit gross.

I know they’re in the past but still there’s no need to keep them is there!

Hi @HornyAlex he may if made a genuine mistake and forgot to delete it, I would give him so Lee way as he has the best deal as he is with you hun :kissing_heart:

1 Like

Comming at this from a different angle - if you were the ex, would you be happy with your sexy photos still being on someone’s phone that you have no idea who they could be showing the photos to? I get that you feel uncomfortable finding the photo on his phone but imagine how mortified his ex may be knowing that you’ve seen it. :flushed:

This is why if I ever stop playing with a partner I ask if they want me to delete everything I have of them. It’s a touchy subject. Especially depending on how good or bad the terms you leave on are.

1 Like

I recently found a file I’d forgot about of erotic photos on my PC that was from an Ex Fuck buddy, what’s worse is my Ex fuck buddy is also my wife’s best friend and she doesn’t know we were fuck buddies!!
Just to add my and the wife weren’t together at the time.