hornyteen wrote:
So I just want to know if people think it is possible to be friends with your ex.
I'm really sorry to hear about your breakup hornyteen. From what you've said before it sounds like this has been coming for a long time, but I know that knowing that doesn't make it feel any easier, or better. It's hard, I know. :/
The thing about being friends with an ex is that in my experience it very much depends on the ex, the reason for the breakup, and how much time has passed. I couldn't be friends with many of my exes because we broke up when they transgressed my trust. I have a personal policy of keeping only trustworthy people in my life no matter whether they're friends or lovers. So I can't be friends with a person whom I know is untrustworthy. I must be able to trust my friends, you know?
I think that how the breakup feels will tell you if you're able to be friends later. I find that the most painful and volatile breakups are unlikely to end up with friendship further down the line. Relationships which just sort of drift out can result in friendship.
Of course, this isn't just you, it also involves the other person. Obviously it's difficult to be friends with a person who doesn't want to be friends, you know? So it's also up to them, which again points to friendship after breakup depending on the particular person.
I'm sure everybody is different and has different experiences, although in my experience, super duper painful breakups are most likely to end up at best with just acquaintanceship and nothing more.
I think cordial acquaintanceship is a worthy goal to strive for, especially if you have to keep encountering them in work or any other compulsory environment. Some of my lovers were never my friends to begin with, so after it's over there's nothing there to build a friendship on, you know?
In short, I think my answer for you in this particular instance is - wait and see. Sorry I couldn't be more definitive, but people sure are unpredictable. :)
I hope you feel lots better really really soon.