Confidence

Can someone give me advice on how my wife can feel more sexy and confident after having 2kids and not getting her figure back.

Thanks

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Subtle and tactful praise by yourself just don’t over do it if she is not used to compliments … no offence intended ! :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

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Surprise her with some lingerie :bikini: maybe like the bodysuits or the bodies / teddies style.

Will help her to feel comfortable as not everything is on show, build up slowly and lots and lots of compliments, making her feel sexy and how much you desire.

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Small steps. General compliments and gradually building up her confidence. She won’t believe you at first and it will take time before she sees what you see.
Now, when we buy new lingerie or clothing in general, I stand her in front of our full length mirror so that she can see just how good she looks .

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Thanks I’m always telling her she looks great and I think she is just use to it or doesn’t think I mean it !!!

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Thanks, so suprise her? I’ve done this before and she just says that more for me than for her?!!

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As a mum of three young kids I can relate to this. Some time to herself to have some pampering and perhaps take a walk or do an exercise class, whatever she enjoys. Having the time to make herself feel a bit better and on a regular basis should hopefully help.

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Thanks sounds good, she use to go swimming twice a week so I will suggest she could go back if she wants.

I think its great that you want to support your wife and the main thing for me is to tell her you find her sexy. I wouldn’t recommend suggesting she goes back to swimming because she might feel like you’re telling her to exercise. If she’s feeling self conscious then she’ll not likely see that as a way to make her feel better.
I would start really small, catch her eye and wink at her, give her ass a wee slap when she walks past, hug her from behind and whisper in her ear how beautiful she is and that you just had to tell her. Start with the ‘beautiful’ compliments over ‘sexy’ so that she doesn’t think you’re saying it to get some sex.
Be vocal about how much you love her and once she starts blushing and smiling, she will start to feel that you might just mean it.
Its not going to be a quick turnaround but it’ll be worth it :slightly_smiling_face:

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Maybe wrap up and leave with a little note before she even says it’s for your benefit.

“ this is for you , I already know you look beautiful and I know you will look beautiful in it, but I won’t you to feel beautiful and see for yourself how hot you look” or similar.

It can be hard to get it right and help body confidence but small steps and keep the positivity with her.

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edited by mod

After having 2 children she is an amazing woman and should be very proud. Give her lots of affection and compliments.

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Hi, I am a mum of 3 children who has experienced body confidence issues. The good news is that from a caring, thoughtful and attentive partner, these issues can be resolved.

My figure returned to ‘normal’ after the first two births, but after I had my third baby, my body had fundamentally changed (wider hips, softer tummy = an increased dress size, plus a visible c-section scar). Add to this the weight gain from contraceptive pills, and I was a much softer-looking version of my former self.

I struggled to accept my new ‘normal’ for quite a while - no amount of diet or exercise could change the width of my hips, for example. And then the pandemic happened. Like most people, I gained a little weight, and I felt terrible! Defo teetered on going up another dress size.

I decided to follow a healthy eating plan and the lockdown weight came straight off, but the fact is that having babies has changed my body, and there is no going back. I started to read about women’s bodies after pregnancy and childbirth, and I realised that my body had actually performed 3 miracles. I started to see my body in a different way: with gratitude, love and acceptance.

Also, my husband is aware of the feelings I’ve had and quite simply, he makes me feel like a goddess. He tells me how much he loves my body now, he really focuses on telling me the things he loves about it. When he tells me, I believe the things he says, and that’s really important. I now feel better about myself than ever before.

You have to give your partner lots of attention, lots of touches, lots of little kisses as well as more passionate ones. Show her you mean what you say. Stroke her hair, tell her how wonderful she is, help her with things around the house if you don’t already. Value her and cherish her.

Definitely do not suggest going swimming again or exercising. I think she may well perceive that as you telling her in an around-about way that you think she needs to exercise/lose weight. Just focus on giving her your undivided attention, lots of loving words and praise, as well as your support, and hopefully all of this will help!

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I’ve struggled with my confidence for years. Crotchless bodysuits were a gamechanger for me!! :raised_hands:t2:

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My wife was left with a mum tum after two kids…the best confidence booster you can give her iscto say you view her exactly the same as she was .
She is your partner in every way.
Im sure you love her just as much if not more.
Tell her to stand tall, shoulders back and love herself.
Yes she can exercise and tone up, but every aspect of having kids may not go away, so accept it and live with it.
Im sure she looks fabulous.

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