I always have doubts about how to open this subject without seeming like I’m trying to force something with my wife (and I’m really not), but in a way that sounds natural, especially since she was the one who opened herself this subject a few months ago and sometimes tell me things that make me wander if she is only kidding me or giving some hints about what she really wants.
About six months ago, I tried doing dirty talk with her during sex, with something like, “Can you imagine if there were several hands right here right now, touching your tits together?”, and she immediately responded “yes”, as if it were another couple with us in bed in full interaction. She said that this idea came up to her once, in a dream. As it’s not something that happens often in our relationship, we never brought it up again (because even myself would have to get used to the idea…).
One night, we were hanging out, going to a bar, and I made a move to adjust my wedding ring because it was a little loose on my finger. Then she asks, with a smile on her face: “Shall we take it off just for today? What happens in the bar stays only in the bar.” I took it as a joke, but we didn’t take it away the ring.
Another example is when she mentions a famous singer, who was well-known as a lesbian, saying that she would be the only type of woman she would flirt (this singer has died in 2001 and had a more rude profile, I mean, with her attitudes).
For these and other reasons, I’m in doubt as to whether or not she would be willing to do something new, to spice up the relationship, or just pretend that she wants to, as a joke, knowing that I’m a more shy person.
Some weeks ago, he commented about a famous singer (also female) and her girlfriend, who both said in an interview that, if they could, they would take Rihanna to bed. Then I said: “If they have this agreement, everything is fine.”, and immediately heard the question from her: “What are our agreements?”, but again in a joking tone.
My challenge is to really know what she wants, as there were many times, for example, when she commented something about an open relationship and then asked the question, again in a joking tone: “Are we going to have one?”.
One night, after we had sex, she talked about his curiosity to know what it would be like to receive oral sex from another woman, even she knowing she’s not a lesbian (bi-curious, maybe).
As these comments were always made without any prior warning, I was always taken by surprise and the conversations did not develop from there. Maybe it’s the safe way she found to check my reactions without being judged. But this is all very intriguing. I believe it is now my turn to start doing the same, taking advantage of a moment of high libido.
It drives me crazy, by not knowing exactly what she wants or has in mind. Or maybe she’s slowly testing me, but me myself asked her once if she has any fantasies, and the only thing she told me was about imagining us in a motel room, which I consider very common, predictable and not so much exciting.
I’d really like to hear your opinion here? Has anyone here ever been through similar situations like these?
My dream now is too see her wearing a corset with black stocks and garter belt.
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