I am almost 40 and have always suffered from PE. I have tried the delay tech and has some pure hypnosis but I dont seem to be able to get control. The creams don't work and I am looking for some tips and support please !!
Is this during intercourse with a new partner, or is your patner tight ? Need more info like are you of average size etc.
relax chill out and have another go after about 30 mins
Chose your positions very carefully try to refrain from missionary etc as it puts too much pressure and makes you come more quickly change positions use your fingers more pull out and eat her out then go back in there's lots you can do try to have a wank first without her knowing also helps but most important don't pannic and remember the more sex you have the better you get and longer you last if I have sex every day I can go for hours full on propped banging but if I go without for a week or so and have a spur of the moment quicky like pull over in the car well may only get a min or so good luck and don't worry
And what about thick condoms ??
Try keep a steady rhythm to your breathing, make sure you take deep long breaths..surprising how much this helps!
Are you cut or uncut?
I found for a number of years that, if I wasn't having regular sex the foreskin being pushed back on entry was too much, a penis pump helped for me, stretching the foreskin so I could enter and relax and enjoy.
I think a lot of it is mental. The more excited I am, the less time I last. If i'm not all that interested I can go for ages. For instance if we're having anal sex, the amazing view makes me far too excited and I need to calm myself down.
Try and give your mind something to do, ok its not perfect being in the moment and trying to recall your DIY todo list but it works.
Maybe something like this can help with "stamina"? http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=13190
You can also try the cheaper sleeves and "practice" this way too.
I definitely recommend the use of cock rings, especially something like this to delay- http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=2589
Hope that helps.
Thanks everyone, I appreciate you all taking the time to comment, some great ideas and I have tried most of them. I think a lack of regular sex is not helping with trying different techniques and I think I need to release before trying anything new next time. I am very passionate and can get very kinky and horney before I enter so I think I need to change my routine a bit maybe. I have been circumcised so not to sure if this is a factor? I have bought a sleeve from LH so I am trying this and it seems to help, will let you know how I get on
I started to write a reply but my laptop is having a phase of cutting out so that's lost and I'll try and recap it here.
I think you could do with desensitising in a number of ways. I've had trouble with this and continue to but not to such a huge degree any more. I found that there were so many things taking me over the edge that just taking a breather before they did was the best thing to do.
I use fingers or toys to keep things going but I just remain still until the sensation has faded enough to carry on. I don't see a problem with it mostly but every part of me just wants to keep going though.
By doing the positions that mentally sent me over the edge, more, I find that I'm much better at coping with them and I've really begun to enjoy them rather than fear my shortcomings (no pun intended but it would have been a good one if it were).
Incidentally, I've found that a condom variety I've got at the moment seems to have helped. It's durex closer and I think it's a little tighter. Perhaps it's having some of the effects of a cock ring in the process but I'm certainly not complaining. Having said that, my OH has just started back on the pill and I really can't wait until that kicks in. Last time without was when our boy was conceived and he's 2 and a half now.
sxe_couple21 wrote:
I think a lot of it is mental. The more excited I am, the less time I last. If i'm not all that interested I can go for ages. For instance if we're having anal sex, the amazing view makes me far too excited and I need to calm myself down.
Try and give your mind something to do, ok its not perfect being in the moment and trying to recall your DIY todo list but it works.
Yeah I've found a lot of it is down to mental stimulation.
I've had sex a few times with a friend who I wasn't super attracted to (and we were also drunk every time) so I lasted quite a while. Then the girl I was seeing last year, I was so excited when she asked me to try anal sex that it was totally embarassing.
I agree with the mental side people are suggesting, if you have the mentality of premature ejaulation itll keep happening. Find ways to chnage it distraction, slow methods, etc.
You could try those stamina training aids different makes help as well.
Absolutly gutted today I have been suffering with this a little bit.
The kids first day back at school had a big coffee to wake me up dropped the kids off the wife said lets have a bit and guess what whop it in and wipe it my heart was racing all over the place out of control I tryed al the usual stuff but I could not control myself luckily I have a very understanding wife well after doing a bit of homework I sussed it it was that fcking coffee so coffee go and Fck off sticking to my glass of orange juice from now on
I have had some help with pure hypnosis and it helped with everything but this!! It is all geared around the mind over matter and that it is more the mindset than the physical. I think it's defiantly the case as I can wank forever and am the king of foreplay but as soon as I even go to enter I am thinking oh dear and having to fight it. I have supported my fear over the years and have to work now to change my thinking, it's good to talk about it and think I am defiantly on the right road to eventually cuming by choice or rather choosing to cum.
I once saw a billy Connolly show where he joked that he did the nine times table in his head. Daft as it may seem, it can help. Just that little bit if mental distraction to keep you going.
tinman wrote:
I once saw a billy Connolly show where he joked that he did the nine times table in his head. Daft as it may seem, it can help. Just that little bit if mental distraction to keep you going.
Oh dear, I better learn my times table, she will probably wonder why I have stopped and are glazed over staring out the window dribbling lol. I think the DIY to do list may work better :-)
Thanks, I defiantly think your right, I have just got to find the thing that works with me I guess, I have a few things to try now, I guess the next hurdle and another issue is regular sex. I don't think it was half as bad when I was younger and had sex every day.