How do other people cope?

Today my partner is travelling to Japan to do set up some research and he will be away for 16 days.

No sex for 16 days !!!! I know masturbation is ok and I have a whole range of sex toys - ok for 1 night, I suppose - but I can't imagine having 16 days worth of loveless sex!

I hate having orgasms and knowing that there will be nothing there afterwards.

I need the 'whole experience' - the physical and mental sexual stimulation sandwiched between the gradual build up of foreplay and the closeness of kissing and stroking and being wrapped around each other afterwards.

I am in absolute panic mode ... I can't remember ever having gone for more than 5 days without sex!

How do other people do it?

I'm currently "saving myself" for my girlfriend. Meaning she's been away for two weeks and I've not had a knuckle shuffle. The idea being hopefully she'll think it sweet I waited, and we all know women love loads of cum.

yh my partners bin workin away for 2 weeks...well monday 2 friday and dats 5 days...which seems long enuf let alone 16!!! mind you the sex is a lot more fiery as we aint had it in a while which is always gud!

It's been 17 hours and I am really missing him :-( OMG another 16 days to go!!!

The weekend after he returns home, we are going to spend away in a hotel in the Lakes away from telephones, e-mails, family and friends so no disturbances just a weekend of love and sex and the occasional bite to eat!

Well, as this is in the 'sex talk' section it seems fitting to recommend you try talking sex over the phone whilst he's away? I know it sounds obvious but how about you spice it up with a toy which has been designed for the purpose? :
and for him:
and if he has an internet connection! :

On the other hand if its a bit of self-love you want to have then its best to really pamper yourself. I often dont see my partner for periods of up to a week, we're really close and physically affectionate as well as enjoying great sex together, I really miss him when I'm away but we have developed our time apart as time to experiment and focus on ourselves and it often works to make the times we're together more interesting and pleasurable. I know you say that youre ok with masturbation but maybe you need to develop a bit more 'self love' as betty dobson calls it, into proceedings. To give yourself a more 'whole experience' why not try giving yourself a nice foot massage, have a bath, chocolate - whatever would be a treat for you, and if you feel like having an orgasm to top it off go for it.
And if it does feel empty then why not follow graymatter's example and save it all up for when he comes back?

Thanks :-)

I do frequently have 'pamper' sessions .... especially involving chocolate!

We did consider 'phone sex' and those suggestions are great but there are 2 problems

1. 9 hours time difference when we are both working the next day .. I get home at 7pm and he will be working until 8pm

2.I usually have such intense orgasms that I need to be held afterwards

Your suggestion of abstinence seems to be the only real solution ... thank goodness he is only a professor and not in the army!

i personally would not worry about it, dont forget there are wifes, gf's partners etc, who their other half are serving away in hot countrys and they get nothing any for 3 months then another 3 months (two week R and R). so relax a little, try and take your mind of it, and be active, dont mope arouind othewise it'll be worse, trust me i know;) hope that helps.

I don't cope very well at all to be honest!! I get really grumpy and distracted, because sometimes even masturbation won't scratch that itch, you want the whole experience.

I tend to find though I get to the stage where I'm horny for days then weeks on end, then the need suddenly disappears and I'm not bothered.

Best thing to do is keep yourself distracted, try not to read any dirty books or watch any dirty films and see if you can keep your mind off sex!!

And then make up for it when he gets back!!

My new flatmates bloke is off for a full year next month- shes bricking it!

Save your masterbation sessions. 16 days isn't really all that long. hell you have to have a break when you're 'on' dontcha? (Or am I the only one who still does that?)

And plan the welcome back party ;)

creativewriter- how're dirty books/ films suppost to keep someones mind OFF sex?! :P lol

creative- ignore me- I misread your comment!

I couldn't have a partner who 'worked away'or was a convict nor could I be a nun!

When I'm with my partner I am horny 90% of the time - I don't have 'off days'.......I just stop for lunch & loo breaks

As for "time of the month".............. we still have sex - we just adapt what we do! (besides orgasms help with the pain)

You're right about distraction I went skiing today and it was great fun ... I'm going again tomorrow.

Tonight when I got home I had 5 messages from my partner between the hours of 2am and 5am Japanese time - he is struggling to sleep - he misses me too :-)

It is difficult to get used to, I know, but I dont think anyone would choose to be far away from the love of their life if they could help it. Even when you dont think you can cope with not seeing the person, you just do somehow, the alternative of ending the relationship because its too hard just isnt an option. Perhaps thinking about all the time you do get together will make this time apart easier, you're lucky to have it.

Well Im currently in a long distance relationship and me and my girlfriend had to go 8 months without seeing each other.

8 MONTHS. No sex, No blowjobs, No physical contact whatsoever.

To get over the emotional separation phone calls and webcams go a long way.
The sexual separation was very difficult at first but over time it got easier. Be verbal about what it is you desire, webcams are good phone sex is good. Another favourite is just Typing out sexual fantsises and dreams over msn or AIM.

Its not easy but its all there is.

Hey there m_a,
My guy and I are both students at different universities so we're apart for around two weeks at a time during term-time. It's not ideal but I always find it's worth the wait. We survive by talking over our cravings by phone and text to build up the anticipation for when we'll next see each other. Distractions are always useful - I find swimming and long gym sessions are good!! Time will fly by!
RR xx

3 days!!!! thats how far I got with abstinence. Then out come Jessica. I did get my before and after bits though :-)

Before I wrote and described in great detail what I wanted to do with him when he returned ... it turned me on just thinking about it.

Then after he called me was 2am Japan time and again he couldn't sleep so then we had 'telephone sex' while he masturbated ...

That is how we have survived until this weekend - he is now staying in a monestry (sightseeing) so sex is out of the question because I can't call and he soesn't have internet access!

My b/f is away on business quite a lot, he went to Bruges on Tuesday - roll on 7.30am on Monday when he gets back. I don't like him going away but it's just one of those things you have to get used to. We do phone and webcam stuff and sometimes no contact for a couple of days which heightens the desire upon his return.