First post but have been lurking for a few weeks, sounds super creepy haha!
Anyway, i was still to have my first orgasm (I'm 24) so decided to try LH. Brought a few things and finally it happened.
My question is do you orgasm everytime you have sex/masturbate? Is the orgasm the important bit, do you have to once you get started? Or can you live with not? I've managed a few times now solo, still to shy infront of my fiancé but sometimes it just won't happen. Sometimes i get a bit over stimulated and numb sometimes i just know it won't happen.
Hi n welcome to forums.. I think the answer to your question is no orgasms are a bonus but I don't find them compulsory to be having a great session.... whether with or without my bf. We still have times where he'll give me none or one even multiple orgasms doesnt mean anything. ?. Relax n enjoy whatever happens I say
I dont orgasm all the time during sex and i find that the sex is still 100% satisfying with or without an orgasm.
with a toy and doing it solo its a whole other story for me! Masturbating for me is to orgasm and if i dont i feel extremely frustrated afterwards!
I think sex is all about the journey but masturbation is definitely only interested in the destination!
You're so right JM88. My wife earlier had problems in getting an orgasm. Easiest for het to get it was when I gave her oral. We started masturbating together, since I knew she orgasmed when doing that. We were looking at each other playing with ourselves and we both came.
After that we are using toys - the fav is the magic wand - while having sex and now we both orgasm almost every time.
I believe it's more important for me as a man to both get it and see my wife have it, at least that's what she is saying (and I believe her).
I do orgasm most time but I wouldn't say it's essential. On the odd occasion I dont orgasm I don't feel disappointed or like I've failed as long as I have still had a good time and enjoyed it.
There re was one time with my fiancé bless him and he was giving me oral and I just wasn't feeling it, I don't know why but my mind just wasn't in it so I said stop and we just cuddled and chatted and it was lovely.
So so I guess what I'm trying to say is as along as you are enjoying what ever bonding you are doing then orgasm or no orgasm I'm fine with.
To answer your question from my perspective, I'm quite about the orgasms, but I think that's a lot because I've built up the expectation that I'll orgasm, so it feels kind of incomplete if I don't. There are some times during sex when I don't, and I still enjoy those times for the most part, and sometimes sex can be fantastic without having to achieve orgasm, but equally sometimes it can be frustrating not to have an end point to the session and it feels... anti-climactic. I definitely find that the times when I don't it's because I'm numb or over-stimulated, as you described, and that can be quite frustrating knowing that you're not going to be able to orgasm because of it, regardless of whatever you're doing. I used to find this a massive problem, but through experimenting with different toys and finding different things that I like, I find that this happens to me a lot less now.
With masturbating, it's kind of similar but I don't enjoy the build up so much as with sex, so I feel like orgasm is more important. I don't like to put a lot of effort in and do see it more as about orgasm, so my toy collection is pretty much designed to take me there quickly with as little hassle as possible.
I do orgasm most time but I wouldn't say it's essential. On the odd occasion I dont orgasm I don't feel disappointed or like I've failed as long as I have still had a good time and enjoyed it.
There re was one time with my fiancé bless him and he was giving me oral and I just wasn't feeling it, I don't know why but my mind just wasn't in it so I said stop and we just cuddled and chatted and it was lovely.
So so I guess what I'm trying to say is as along as you are enjoying what ever bonding you are doing then orgasm or no orgasm I'm fine with.
Exactly what I was tryna say...
For instance me n bf was having a session was going good he was almost there the we both got distracted the film that was on behind us featured a boy committinb sucide that was it ... we were done so be both cuddled but to us it didnt matter we had bonded before hand x
when i fist started being able to it was with my OH, quite frustrating when ony person knows how to get you there adn that person isnt you! it would happen every time and when it didnt it wouldnt bother me at all, a year down the line its rare that i dont, but sometimes i like sex without an orgams, its nice and i certainly feel satisfied without it. there is a point though when i need it, like if OH is performing oral after a while he has to keep going until i have or i feel really frustrated, and the more i think about it and the longer it takes the harder it is. its like riding a bike, when you start you dont always get there but once youve been doing it a few years its rare you ever fall off lol