Its gone I have lost my hornyness i got a fleshlight and the wife was away for few days it was fun the fist few times but its a pain cleaning and drying etc.I can not be bothered with it anymore.
And the wife came home and wanted sex (thats a first)only trouble nothing happened for for me.
I am just not interested in fact not sure why I am here.
Whats going on
Hello I Wish. I am sorry to hear that you have lost interest in sex. Obviously not knowing you or your situation, I can't provide a solution. There may be lots of reasons why your libido has ceashed through the floor - this hot weather is making everyone tired; you probably have the same money worries as many of us; your work might be getting you down - whatever it is, do take some time to try and figure out what it is that's wrong. And please, please talk to your missus - there's nothing worse for any relationship when one half closes off and isn't communicating what's up. Do something nice together - if the weather holds out, have a picnic or a nice meal in the evening. Don't try to have sex - just lots of cuddles.
If things carry on, do consider seeking external advice - please don't let things fester.
As for your Fleshlight, hopefully some of the guys on here will have tips on easy maintenance. Or you could check out their website for advice. But maybe it's just not what you need right now - so put it away in your toybox til you feel better about stuff.
Sending you hugs and wishes for better times ahead honey - please stay on the forums and update on how you get on.
Very good advice from Jaygee there I Wish. So sorry to hear about your problems hun.
I think that everyone goes through stages where sex just doesn't really appeal. There's nothing wrong with that and it's likely that, given time and the right stimulus, you'll snap out of it. Try not to worry about it too much or you'll make it even harder for yourself to relax and get into the mood.
Good luck I Wish.
hey i wish
im going through a bit of a lack of sex drive to at the mo and i to am not 100% sure why. but im sure it will pick up soon.
your not the only one going through this :(
Dxx
redapple wroteI think that most people have their ''ups and downs'' - eeek ...with their libido's mine crashed for too many years and I ignored it, in fact I didn't want sex but was happy masturbatng - and I realised it was relationship concerns ...
see i have no intreast in masturbating eaither, my sex drive seems to just have gone from 100 to like 5. i just dont seem intreasted in eaither sex or masturbating at all, i might have one day in the week were i feel horny but even then i dont feel as horny as i used to. i can go months with out masturbating and have sex only one or two times at the weekend and not really be botherd bout having sex at all(when i see the bloke) but we used to have sex like a min of 3 times at the weekend.
i dont think my relationship is bad, true we have annoyed each other just lately but thats all be due to stress of him getting and moving into a flat and housework, but my lack of sex drive has been going on longer then this. so i wouldnt put mine done to realtionship problems. :S
sorry to butt in, but something u said redapple just made me want to reply.
Dxx
One episode of "not being in the mood" doesn't equal a problem, everyone can have days of not feeling like sex, I used to have weeks of them! It's only if it keeps happening that it could get into a pattern of rejection. If someone ever prefers masturbating to sex with a partner, then it's definitely a problem somewhere in the relationship. Maybe you'd gone a little too mad with your toy and depleted your sexual feelings?
Perhaps it was the shock of your wife wanting sex? I know my hubby found it extremely strange when I suddenly went from once or twice a month to wanting sex on a daily basis. I think that men maybe want sex far more when their partner isn't interested and then when it's there on tap for them , it throws them a bit - I've had to come to terms with the fact that my hubby doesn't want sex as often as I do at the moment, if he's had a bad day at work he just isn't interested, I was upset by this until he explained that he doesn't want to make love to me with a load of negative and unpleasant things in his head, he said he would feel like he was using me to make himself feel better when I asked him if sex wouldn't be a great de-stresser. If he's tired then all he wants is a cuddle too.
Perhaps you are just plan tired and are now trying to make a mountain out of a mole hill (probably the wrong expression). Just talk to her ...
As for Fleshlights and cleaning, get a Tenga Flip, lot more enjoyable and so easy to clean.
?
Ahhh, Thought I was being shouted at for a sec
:)
i whish
why not try having a break from masturbating?
personally i find after a good session i cant be bothered again for a while. also talking to your wufe will help a lot
and dont forget if it goes on for quite a while you can always go to the doctors
I've had a crappy sex drive too recently. For me it's the Pill, but don't worry you're not alone, we've all been here. best news is that it passes! Wait it out and don't get too worried!
Its been a few days now and we had a quicky but I needed more and its not sex.
I have figured out that I need Love and then the sex.I like the build up to it and beening close which has not been happening lately.I think I have just got fed up of doing all the work and making a fuss of her I would like this back.
Men need Love to and this makes the sex better.
Sex is so much hard work at times.
I Wish wrote:
Its been a few days now and we had a quicky but I needed more and its not sex.
I have figured out that I need Love and then the sex.I like the build up to it and beening close which has not been happening lately.I think I have just got fed up of doing all the work and making a fuss of her I would like this back.
Men need Love to and this makes the sex better.
Sex is so much hard work at times.
Heh, I think the sex part is easy! I think the hard part is relating to other human beings. And since the other human beings are the ones we're having sex with (including ourselves), I think that's what makes getting to the sex part difficult.
I wrote in another thread about the basic primal human need for affectionate touch from other human beings. I think this is an integral part of why we need sex and why we benefit from it. Of course, to get and give the affectionate touch, we need to feel comfortable exchanging affectionate touch with specific people. In my experience, emotional conflict (whether internal or external) can interfere with this.
So I think that getting comfortable with exchanging affectionate touch is a useful goal to have. Once that has been achieved, sex should follow naturally when it's appropriate.
I Wish, when you said "nothing happened for me", did you mean erectile dysfunction? In my experience, that happens to almost all men sometimes. If it persists, you might want to consult your GP about it.
I think that if it's more affection and love that you need, this is something I'm sure your OH will relate to if you talk to her about it. I really would just urge you to tell her gently that you feel a bit neglected or unloved (or whatever in your own words) in a non-accusatory way and ask for more affection and I really hope that she'll respond positively. I do think that as a society we can sometimes assume men don't need that and a gentle reminder and talking about it should encourage her to help give you what you need. Good luck.