I'm a reformed "not interested" and I honestly don't know what to say. If you'd have tried anything with me I'd have felt pressured into sex and I'd have shut down further. All the romantic gestures, whilst well-meaning, just made me feel more pressured.
The change has to come from her. I just woke up one day not that long ago and thought life, and sex in particular, were passing me by. I loved my husband, I just didn't love myself. So I decided to make sex fun for myself, I bought toys (we'd never used them before), I became bolder, i got over my insecurities and rather than rejecting me, as I'd feared, my OH loves it. We have so much fun now, whereas sex used to be a chore.
My advice would be talk to her, reassure her that you love her, sex or not, but that you miss the closeness and the fun. Try and have fun with her without the sex, laugh together, do fun things and if she does want to try, get out of your bedroom, which maybe reminds her of her hang-ups, and take her to a hotel. Have a bubble bath, buy her some sexy but classy underwear, get some of the fun toys, maybe some massage oil.
i hope you and she can reconnect because she's missing out. Maybe read my reply to her so she can understand she's not that unusual.