Porn addiction

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Hi all
I am desperatly trying to kick the porn habbit .
I am finding that I am spending too much time looking at it .
Worse still ,it seems to have been killing my sex drive ( among a few other things ) and it's not fair on my wife .
I have blocked it , and haven't viewed any for about a week , my sex drive is slowly returning (about 20 mph , instead of 10 mph . )

I am wondering if any other members have this problem and what have they done about it ?

BTW , if my sex drive doesn't increase much more soon ,I won't have a clue what to do :-(

I just want to be "normal " again
Thanks , in advance , everyone

2

Any addiction isnt good for you no matter what it is. To help with your problem are there not any aspects of porn or soft porn that you could watch together ? Perhaps get some 18 cert films on DVd such as the new FSOG fiilm and make a night of it with your Mrs . Perhaps watch it in conjunction with a romantic meal at home or in a restaraunt.

I also think you and your Mrs need to talk as I may be wrong but your enjoyment of sex seems to me coming from watching porn rather than your Mrs. Perhaps you both need to spice hings up a bit in the bedroom but you can only do that through talking .

3

Having any addiction can be unhealthy but you can like all things have a small taste and it's actually good for you. Porn is a great release and excellent way to enjoy seeing others while staying loyal but a lot of people can get addicted and it does take a toll on not only yourself but others around you. I was similar to yourself in my early twenties and I had a vast amount of the stuff but one day I literally went cold turkey. I limited myself to one day a week and after a while it just became habit, I found a new love for my partner at the time and we had a lot more fun and laughs.

The worst thing is to stay negative and worry that things aren't "normal". Like everyone you will get urges and maybe your not fulfilled in certain aspects of your sex life, just talk to your partner and ask her if she would want to try some new things, get a few costumes and see how she feels and try and focus on all the things that turn you on about her. Unfortunately with most addictions you may fall off the wagon but don't see this as a failure just a stepping stone in the right direction. And remember you are normal and at least you know it's become a problem In your relationship for you to now fix and resolve.

4

No addiction is good, but thats what it is an addiction. There are professionals who can help. I think cold turkey is the only way forward, and perhaps do something else like go to gym in the times you would be looking.

5

Is it an additiction or do you simply get greater satisfaction from watching porn / masturbating than sex with your partner?

The difference I guess is that do you pass up the opportunity for sex for self release? Do you actively search out porn and prioritise it ahead of other things (work, socialising etc)?

You have at least taken the first step, recognising that there may be a problem.

I'd say that the next step, is a frank and honest discussion with your O.H. It may not be easy, and her reaction may be strong initially but she will most likely appreciate the openness rather than being shut out with lack of intimacy.

After a rather drunken night of passion with my OH, we had an open(ish) conversation about sex and desires, we have now started being more open about what we want, our fantasies and doing things to please the other, I have phrased it elsewhere on the boards here, releasing my "inner pervert".

I think part of my issue was my love for Mrs Sen, I saw how the women were treated in porn, and whilst I know thats not normal sex by any stretch of the imagination, I didn't want to see her in the same light, too much love / respect for her for that, but at that stage, it was an A or B scenario. There are lots more options along the scale from Angel to Harlott, don't be afraid of your OH showing you where she is on the scale. It has been my biggest turn on yet with our play time and her letting go of herself.

I was probably close to being addicted myself, I tend to get very narrow focussed on one thing and stick with it until the next thing comes along, whether thats Porn or spending money on something I "need" like a new TV etc, my mind flips from one thing to the next (case in point, I have spend about $450NZ pesos here on LH in the last month as we delve into sex toys).

I guess, ultimately, communication with her is key. If you can tell her what you want, and find out what she wants, then take it from there.

Sen

6

Porn addiction is a tricky one to kick. Many believe there is no such thing and others say it's more difficult to kick a porn habit than it is to come off of Meth. You have realised you have a problem which is the first step to recovery.

Google Terry Crewes, he admitted to porn addiction that was destroying his relationship.

7

Senator wrote:

Is it an additiction or do you simply get greater satisfaction from watching porn / masturbating than sex with your partner?

The difference I guess is that do you pass up the opportunity for sex for self release? Do you actively search out porn and prioritise it ahead of other things (work, socialising etc)?

You have at least taken the first step, recognising that there may be a problem.

I'd say that the next step, is a frank and honest discussion with your O.H. It may not be easy, and her reaction may be strong initially but she will most likely appreciate the openness rather than being shut out with lack of intimacy.

After a rather drunken night of passion with my OH, we had an open(ish) conversation about sex and desires, we have now started being more open about what we want, our fantasies and doing things to please the other, I have phrased it elsewhere on the boards here, releasing my "inner pervert".

I think part of my issue was my love for Mrs Sen, I saw how the women were treated in porn, and whilst I know thats not normal sex by any stretch of the imagination, I didn't want to see her in the same light, too much love / respect for her for that, but at that stage, it was an A or B scenario. There are lots more options along the scale from Angel to Harlott, don't be afraid of your OH showing you where she is on the scale. It has been my biggest turn on yet with our play time and her letting go of herself.

I was probably close to being addicted myself, I tend to get very narrow focussed on one thing and stick with it until the next thing comes along, whether thats Porn or spending money on something I "need" like a new TV etc, my mind flips from one thing to the next (case in point, I have spend about $450NZ pesos here on LH in the last month as we delve into sex toys).

I guess, ultimately, communication with her is key. If you can tell her what you want, and find out what she wants, then take it from there.

Sen

This is a great response 👍
8

Have a look at yourbrainonporn.com. This has some great advice around deciding whether you have a problem or not and also has lots of stories from people who've been through what they call the "reboot" which is basically going completely cold turkey on porn use.

If you've become dependent on porn - ie find it hard to get aroused without it, then one of the things that may happen when you stop is something they call "flatlining" where you appear to completely lose your sex drive for a while. The stories from other people who've been through this can really help you get through this.

I think the site takes a bit of a hard-line on porn, but you don't have to agree with that to benefit from the information around breaking a porn addiction.