Yeah I agree that a good honest talk is important but you must remember that sexual pleasure isn't a "tit-for-tat" game.
Ideally, you shouldn't give your partner pleasure because you want it back - you should give it because you want to, freely and without expectations. To have an expectation that if you pleasure her you're going to get something back really begins testing the line of consent and majorly pressurises sex for the other person.
I had an ex who also would feel hurt when there wasn't an almost immediate gratification after I'd "received mine" and for me. it was one of the biggest turn offs ever. It made me feel really stressed about sex and stopped me being able to enjoy any pleasure he gave me towards the end because it felt like he was only pleasuring me to "get his". It kind of snuffed out the magic for me.
Not to mention, if you've done the sterling job you describe of getting her off, then it's no surprise she's not horny later, because you've fully satisfied her (hooray!) I wouldn't be horny later that day either as my horn would have been blown for the day. This is a perfect opportunity, if you need some satisfaction, to enjoy some solo play.
Do you really want her to make a move on you for the sake of "levelling the playing field" even though she isn't horny, or would you rather her jump you because she just HAS to?! (I know which I'd prefer.)
I would ask yourself the following:
Why does it hurt you so much when you don't get "it" back?
What would change if you agreed that you would receive pleasure back quickly after giving?
Why is it so important that your returned pleasure happens that same day?
Does she ever give you selfish pleasure? Across a year, would you say it evens out?
Does she do other things for you that aren't sex that you don't return the favour on? (Cooking / cleaning / child/petcare for example.)
Other thoughts...
Maybe quickies just don't work for you guys? Perhaps in those one hour sessions you can explore something else like mutual masturbation, or a 69? Something where there is a little more equal participation at the time.
Why not agree that if one of you receives selfish pleasure, the favour will be returned, but leave it more open to when it happens. Maybe, you can agree that the "payback" happens within that month, for example? Or you can make it more tongue in cheek and write IOU cheques!
I don't usually advocate this, but sometimes there is the time and the place: Skip foreplay all together! When you have an hour, have a quick warm up and go straight to sex. Know you have an hour free later that day? Your OH can wear a love egg or similar to warm up ready for a quick sesh later.
Plan selfish sex nights. Ok so this won't help with the spontaneous sex balance, but if you know that on the 21st of the month, you've booked in a selfish night, when you pleasure her on the 12th of the month and don't get it back, it's cool coz you know that you have a fun night coming in a couple of weeks. It may help soften the blow (so to speak!!)
Anyway - I thought I'd give my 2 cents as I've been in a very similar situation but from the other side of the coin.
Definitely talk openly about why this hurts you / and why she doesn't think about it as much as you. I'm sure you can come to a compromise.