The OH and I are using the miracle of IVF to help us grow our family. As part of it and the stage we are at I have to go some days without any kind of release. I wouldn't have thought this too much of an issue as we are not the highest libido couple but when you can't have it etc etc.
Anyway, I have been given a stay of execution and our go dates have been pushed back so I can have some fun. Problem is I get so damn horny when I want it and my mind goes fairly filthy, my wife has quite simple tastes really.
How do you guys cope with extreme horniness and dirty thoughts when you're OH isn't quite on the same wavelength? I'm not looking for any kind of 'help me my wife won't let me do this and that to her' type of thing, more about how you cope when the avenues are firmly shut.
I think you should discuss a regular sex life in parallel to the IVF. If both you and the wife are relaxed, regular, and comfortable I think there is better chance for things to proceed naturally.
We did IVF for the 2nd child as background. During this process we heard that the natural way was still possible and that we should not stress too much abouth the IVF.
My OH is considerably more lewd than I. I am aware that he sates his interest with pornography; as long as it is in his own time and not instead of me, it doesn't interfere with our sex life.
At the end of the day sex gets you good sensations and intimate connection. A lot of kinky stuff is in the mind anway, so entertain it there on your own terms.