Never thought I would say this but sex is boring right now. My partner isn’t boring in bed but he’s been in lock down with me and parents for a good 2 months now. He was staying with me when lock down was announced, so he stayed here. But we’ve got ourselves into a rut :( same old routine, same positions for multiple reasons: - me and parents bedrooms are only 5 foot apart - use same position that doesn’t make a lot of noise, like missionary or spooning - sticking to quiet toys - most importantly, we don’t want to get overheard. Other night we had to keep telling each other to be quiet lol Can sex still be spiced up while being sneaky about it? Lol
Of course it can... Get a ball gag =P
You could always try some sex games, Lovehoney sell plenty of different ones. You could try different types of toys that are silent, glass toys for example can introduce temperature play which some people really enjoy. A sleeve for your partner, can make a HJ or BJ a little bit different and more enjoyable. You could always try role play, make it a little fun and playful.
If you haven't spoke to your OH yet, ask them how they feel and come up with suggestions together =)
There are loads of ways to spice it up!
Quiet sex can be a big turn on because you know you shouldn't be doing it and you're always on edge that someone will hear you. Knowing you have to make your partner orgasm in total silence adds to the excitement! You can try having sex on the floor which may be less noisy than on a bed! I would try different positions, and different angles where you maybe go slow but deep instead of just going fast. Try focus on each other and the sensitive spots, take it slow and take time to discover each others body's.
Maybe add some accessories like a blindfold, restraints, which will highten all your other senses such as touch, taste. You can also play with ice cubes during oral, or simply on the body, try get tingly or hot lube for sex and any anal toys! A gag would also be great to avoid soft moans coming out.
You can also try new things like edging, masturbating next to each other, try stretching/fisting. Like I said being quiet adds to the excitement. Why not do it outside? Go for a walk and have a quicky in a bushed area or in a car park. Maybe give each other a sex break and wait a week until you have sex again, tease each other throughout the day, that will leave both of you desperate for sex! That way you will both be very horny and it will add passion and fire the next time!
Don't worry there are loads of ways to spice up your sex life when you have to be quiet!
We talked about role play last night after sex and looked online for role play ideas. The sub and dom roleplay seems to be most appealing to us, so gonna incorperate it into play time next time :D
We enjoy that one EmmaC. X. I'm naturally very sub in the bedroom anyway so was an easy role to fit into. We play slave on a lead and master is a good one. To wear a colour or form of colour gets you into the role. Another is sub secretary . Dress in office clothes seethrough blouse etc. Punter and Prostitute can be arousing also. Just use your imagination and get fully into the role. Good luck. 💋❤
Firstly, try doing doggy on the floor, this has saved us before when staying at other peoples houses 😅 doesn't make nearly as much noise. Secondly try some glass or metal toys, a metal butt plug is a winner for me. I've reviewed one on here we got a few weeks ago, its brilliant! Try getting some under matress restraints too (I've reviewed these also) they will keep one of you in place and the other can keep control of the noises that happen. You could really make this situation fun 😁
I might be on the wrong track here, so ignore me if that is the case. Others have made good suggestions which have given me some ideas too.
You have mentioned in the past that you have a disability - I'm wondering if you are 'shielded'? I am, and so is my 10 year old. Lockdown has killed my libido because of that underlying anxiety about getting too ill to manage and to look after him, or - at worst - losing him. I'm even more on edge now that lockdown seems to have been - in my opinion - eased too soon.
I think we might be living with various kinds of lockdown and social distancing for some time to come because covid-19 isn't going to go away - it will become 'the new normal', as the papers keep reporting. So, I've decided that if I can't make the threat go away, I need to manage my own anxiety about it all and reclaim some peace of mind and rekindle some sense of desire - not easy when my OH is here all the time, room hopping and swapping computers, losing that frisson of being apart for the working day.
I've bought some new lingerie / sleepwear and massage oil (thank you, Lovehoney). My aim is to spend time relaxing with my OH and enjoying each other, with no pressure for things to go further unless we both want to. A lot of us might need to adapt our sex lives to this new way of life!
Sorry if that is not remotely relevant to you. As I say, others have provided lots of ideas for spicing things up. Can you add a curtain on a rail above your bedroom door for extra privacy and to muffle any noise? I would find it really difficult being with wider family all the time - good luck.
MsR I completely relate to your post. I'm in similar situation I have underlying condition and so does my teenager. This has put a dampened on things for me as well. My husband also works on frontline as a medical professional so that's a big worry as well. Trying to be quiet and quick is not always great! We also have the problem that our teen is up later than we are!
MiddleAgedDirtbag wrote:
MsR I completely relate to your post. I'm in similar situation I have underlying condition and so does my teenager. This has put a dampened on things for me as well. My husband also works on frontline as a medical professional so that's a big worry as well. Trying to be quiet and quick is not always great! We also have the problem that our teen is up later than we are!
Thanks, and good luck to you both - I've just seen this after replying to your menopause thread. My OH is also NHS but not frontline at mo. Hope they know what stars they are!
@EmmaC - this has just occured to me for myself, scrolling through the lingerie section, and I wondered if it might help.
If the situation under lockdown is boring / stressful, have you tried role-play? I never have, but as the current situation is freaking me out I'm tempted to try a fantasy world where sex is concerned.
I've never quite been comfortable before with the outfits of women who are often under male authority (nurses, secretaries, schoolgirls, maids etc) being used in porn. Even at Lovehoney the authoritative poilce outfits seem to be for men, not women. But maybe in my own home with my own partner, it might just take us somewhere else for a couple of hours... what do you think?
Would that be helpful for you too?