Hey guys, just wondering if anyone has a sex schedule? A day or days which you and your partner have sex dates to make sure you don’t lose the spark etc?. I was reading an article which states this is one of the best things for partners with super busy lives and Jobs even though it does kill the romance a little.
We don't have a sex schedule but it has been something we talked about doing though due to both having jobs and two children.
I just feel that if we had a schedule, say Thursdays at 8pm.. would I always feel like urgh got to have sex tonight? My sex drive is pretty up there and Mr L does a good job to keep up but I love the thrill of in the moment, running my hands down there knowing that I am thinking I want/need it right now... does he? That for me is exciting and as you said above, a schedule probably does kill the romace a little!!
I guess rather than making a schedule, a good idea would be to (and we do this) text one another like I am really feeling it tonight, can't wait to get home... that way you know what is going down and you can anticipate and look forward to a good night together!
Wednesdays and Saturdays. 🙂 It's not set in stone but it helps us keep track of if either of us is getting neglected.
Was Monday nights when our daughter was still a baby. I didn’t really feel like having sex at all but I felt like I needed to make the effort for my husband’s sake, so I suggested it, otherwise we would have just got used to not having sex at all.
Since getting my libido back, don’t need to book an appointment anymore, only limiting factor is husband’s energy levels, poor wee lamb just looks shattered. I do warn him now as others have said, he gets texts during the day, so he knows he’s got husbandly duties to attend to when the little one is asleep (literally as soon as her door is shut at the moment!).
Gosig wrote:
I didn’t really feel like having sex at all but I felt like I needed to make the effort for my husband’s sake, so I suggested it, otherwise we would have just got used to not having sex at all.
Seem to have reverted back to this phase unfortunately, some background reasons why she might be in this zone, hopefully working towards addressing them.
Gosig wrote:
Since getting my libido back, don’t need to book an appointment anymore, only limiting factor is husband’s energy levels, poor wee lamb just looks shattered. I do warn him now as others have said, he gets texts during the day, so he knows he’s got husbandly duties to attend to when the little one is asleep (literally as soon as her door is shut at the moment!).
Posts like this give me hope If you have any tips on where you put your missing libido feel free to pass them on please.
A lot of pros and cons, and I can defiantly see how it would seem more of a chore and become a bit of task if you had a time set in stone. We just go for it when the moment comes but I will admit if a dry spell hits we can go a while without intimacy which can make us both snappy and awkward. But it’s nice to see all the different ways people handle sex in a relationship and how it works out on both ends. I would never want my partner to feel she doesn’t have a choice if we had a day set in stone as I feel the sex would be forced and awful, but I do like the idea of maybe setting a toy day or costume day to keep the fires burning.
Thursday, Saturday and Sunday Mornings.
These are the days when we don't have to get up to look after the grandchildren.
We're both in our late 60's so we're usually to tired to have sex at night but we do have lie-in's with benefits on Thursday, Saturday and Sunday.
NibbleNob wrote:
Posts like this give me hope If you have any tips on where you put your missing libido feel free to pass them on please.
Ha! Like I was just careless with my libido, left it unattended at a petrol station or something. Had to put up pictures of it on telephone poles ‘reward offered for information on possible sightings’ etc.
Any tips? Hmm. I find being a mum really hard work, I find it quite draining, this and medication really dampened not only my libido but just my general enjoyment of pretty much anything. Change of meds and a bit more time to myself now, and I feel like a different person, more like ‘me’ again. Not really any tips I’m afraid, just my experience. You say background issues are being dealt with, I really do hope things do improve for you and Mrs N.
Well Gosig, I didn’t marry Mrs N for her tidiness, if anyone could happen to misplace a libido she’s the one. Comments on kids are spot on, ours are a bit older and perhaps more mentally challenging for her now than physically. I’m trying to patiently wait it out (and help with any issues of course) and not add to her problems, perceived or otherwise. Couldn’t half do with some regular action though 😕 Appreciate your best wishes though, some good supportive people on here. Thank you.
Justthe2: that all sounds pretty hardcore. Glad you are happy and having a good time.
Justthe2ofus2007 wrote:
So up until this year, I spent every evening hiding out in the bath until I knew hubby had fallen asleep.this year, my sex drive came back literally out of no where and I'm pretty demanding at times, think the hubby enjoys going to work for a break 😂😂
our schedule now is Monday play night, so anything except sex, tire nights sex, Wednesday play night, Thursday sex, Friday night play & sex, Saturday sex in the morning and Saturday nights we put the kids a bed, crack a bottle of wine or 2 and we have crazy sex, and finish with anal. Sunday night is rest night 😂
we don't see it as a chore our marriage has improved forfold since we're regularly intimate.
How much sex and bedroom antics?! And I thought we were pretty full on haha! You go girl!
JT2OU: no chance of you two losing your spark, that fire ain’t out for long enough to need re-lighting! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Justthe2ofus2007 wrote:
now it feels like we’re at the start where we can’t keep our hands of each other.
Ah man, that is just wonderful, with all the shit you’ve been through, I’m really happy for you both. 😘
God I seem very boring compared to you lot. We dont have a schedule. I dont think I would like it. It would seem to planned for my liking. I am more of a spontaneous kind of girl. Plus it just wouldnt work with our kids who are 11 and 16.
Would hate a schedule. Don’t need one anyway. Hubby knows that if he’s home then we’re having sex that night! Currently he’s on three nights 😭 so once he’s home Saturday morning we’ll have a quicky while the kids are downstairs and then sat night after the panto it’ll be more playtime 😈 Unfortunately I work from home during the day so no chance of us seeing any action during daytime hours. Our children are 14, 10 and 1! They exhaust me but I always find time for my hubby 😉
I see my fella Saturday - Wednesday every week unless he has his daughter one weekend, so it's 2 maybe 3 times a day while he's here and as long as mother nature isn't visiting 😂 xx
Just Tease Me wrote:
God I seem very boring compared to you lot. We dont have a schedule. I dont think I would like it. It would seem to planned for my liking. I am more of a spontaneous kind of girl. Plus it just wouldnt work with our kids who are 11 and 16.
You seeming ‘very boring’? Boring? With your bondage strap body harness and pegging? Noooooooooooo way man!
We only had a schedule because everything had gone wrong with our sex life and it was all I could think of to try and kick-start things again. I am very happy that we have the spontaneity back.
Well when you put it like that 😂 but the pegging and bondage harness is not a daily thing believe me, just a little treat when we get the chance.Gosig wrote:
Just Tease Me wrote:
God I seem very boring compared to you lot. We dont have a schedule. I dont think I would like it. It would seem to planned for my liking. I am more of a spontaneous kind of girl. Plus it just wouldnt work with our kids who are 11 and 16.
You seeming ‘very boring’? Boring? With your bondage strap body harness and pegging? Noooooooooooo way man!
We only had a schedule because everything had gone wrong with our sex life and it was all I could think of to try and kick-start things again. I am very happy that we have the spontaneity back.
With my ex it was always every Ssturday and Sunday morning with unplanned evenings now and again. We both had busy jobs so made sure we had time to play regulary. It did get a bit routine! Now re-married and retired, we don't have a schedule as such, but make sure we play every few days.
Sadly we haven’t had sex for years.