Single or long-distance, which is worse?

I find myself in a long-distance relationship (250 miles) which is going OK, but I am finding when we're apart I am incredibly horny (more than my usual level which is fairly high). In short, it's driving me absolutely fucking nuts.

I can't decide which is worse - being single and horny, or having a sexy OH so far away you can't do anything about it.

Before you say it - phone/web/IM sex is not a great option with lodgers in the house.

Long distance relationships are definitely worse! At least you know you have somebody special, albeit many many miles away!

In terms of horniness I reckon its worse being single, at least in a relationship (even LDR's) you know where the next shag is coming from! And even though the waiting is annoying, i find it makes it even better when you do finally get to see one another.

Agree with Nexas - single is much worse than long distance. At least if you're long-distance you've got someone who loves you, who you can share your thoughts,feelings & hopes with.

There are alternatives to sex when you can't be together that can keep you ticking over as it were.

Personal experiance here, tried to make a long distance relationship work, from uk to australia. Didn't work to start with but after 6 months it kinda came back, but in a good way. I think that this would only work with someone who is very speical to you though.

Being single has its plus side though, it means you can go out to a club and not have any worries about what you get up to.

Try 2 and a half years without seeing them at all

Nexas wrote:

Doug wrote:

Try 2 and a half years without seeing them at all External Media

I don't know how you managed...other countries...I could only do if I was shortly planning on moving there/they were planning on moving here.

to be honest its complicated, but in the simplest way we are both ok for the other to have differnet partners, as long as it doesn't get serious

but hopefuly going out there in my gap year

I think the problem with long distance is that it highlights all of the issues in your relationship.

At least it's a sure fire way of working out if it's worth it though.

Worse to be single and miserable. But not if you are single and happy.

I think it depends on your frame of mind, personally I love being single and i think a long distance relationship would be harder both emotionally and physically.

XghX

Well I'm in a strange LDR, far too complicated to explain, and whilst it has it's great moments for sure, it equally has it's very low moments... I struggle some times not seeing him for 3 or 4 weeks cos then my low self-esteem kicks in and I make loads of shit up in my head, which is just not true but I can't seem to help myself...

Sometimes I think it may be better being single cos I wouldn't have the huge highs and lows and I would be emotionally quite level, but as I absolutely love the highs, and he's god damn amazing in bed, I'll put up with the lows cos the LDR bit isn't going to change so I have to find a work around....

Not really a good answer is it? LOL

MissTerryCleavage wrote:

Well I'm in a strange LDR, far too complicated to explain, and whilst it has it's great moments for sure, it equally has it's very low moments... I struggle some times not seeing him for 3 or 4 weeks cos then my low self-esteem kicks in and I make loads of shit up in my head, which is just not true but I can't seem to help myself...

Sometimes I think it may be better being single cos I wouldn't have the huge highs and lows and I would be emotionally quite level, but as I absolutely love the highs, and he's god damn amazing in bed, I'll put up with the lows cos the LDR bit isn't going to change so I have to find a work around....

Not really a good answer is it? LOL

its honest which is the best

Andserkiel wrote:

Doug wrote:

to be honest its complicated, but in the simplest way we are both ok for the other to have differnet partners, as long as it doesn't get serious

Ahh see I couldn't do this which is why that type of long distance relationship wouldn't work for me. Not seeing someone for over 2 years... to be blunt and without meaning to cause offence, I personally couldn't call that a "relationship". But that's just my opinion.

its fair enough, and to be frank, its more of a close friendship. And no offence taken dont worry

Oh good Lord, being single and enjoying the pleasures of many far out weighs most relationships for me. Takes a lot to persuade me into monogamy but then I always know it's worth the sacrafice when I do.

Nexas wrote:

See, I don't like the whole single thing...the freedom was welcome when I broke from my last big relationship but...I hate it!

I know what you mean, it really can suck big time

Mmmm if I was in the situation (so to speak) I'd prefer to be single.

I could always masterbate and not worry about when I'd next see it again as it would be in my drawer the whole time.

Time apart makes the heart grow fonder yes, but how much time?

I know a few friends and family who have been in long distance and in the end have ended it due to it not working and sexual frustration. Fair play to them I suppose but I say single from seeing how people feel and felt close to me over LD.

I find that everyone at some point has felt just as lonely with a boyfriend or girlfiend as they have when they're alone.

I think this is why I'm powerfully attracted to men and women who don't *need* to be with someone. Then when commitment comes to town, I really feel like they're really choosing to be with me, again and again. When they could find equal fulfillment with the friends and lovers passing more briefly through their lives.

Chin up, singletons. Singlehood is fabulous and you can play awful music at any volume you like. Win Win.

I think having low self esteme I just couldnt do a LDR =S....... to me I would always think there are better ppl out there than me and they would have the opportunity to do what they like...... oh god can anyone tell im having a bad day today =(

the worst thing about being single is the lonlyness

Doug wrote:

the worst thing about being single is the lonlyness

I can be lonly though and i'm with an amazing guy. I think it depends on what you are like in yourself and what uve been though in your life. Part of me would love to spend ALL my time with my OH but i'd or we'd go out of our minds and everyone needs space and do do their own things. Missing your OH is a great thing =)