My hubby had advanced prostate cancer about 3 years ago. A number of biopsies, operation and 60 radiotherapy sessions and 3 years on hormone therapy meant that his testerone is really low, which meant that his penis shrunk and now even with the blue pills can hardly get an erection.
So I thought I buy him a vibrating cock ring, but he does not like it. Says it feels funny. Also the ring is too large and I cannot find a smaller one. We have tried a number of natural herbs and potions but they also do not work. The mind is very willing but the parts are not, which is very frustrating for him as he always was a very sexual person.
Anyone got any ideas of what to use, which is not too mechanical or noisy as it would just put him off?
I don't know exactly how viable this is with his history, but would it be possible for him to discuss getting testosterone replacement with his doctor?
If the problem is low testosterone, then having additonal testosterone in his system may sort out his issues.
I'd just thought i'd mention that Rhino horn is a banned substance for international trade. It's illigally harvested from wild culling and is completely useless to humanity as it is basically nothing but toenails.
I'd just thought i'd mention that Rhino horn is a banned substance for international trade. It's illigally harvested from wild culling and is completely useless to humanity as it is basically nothing but toenails.
Glad somebody said it. I would stay clear of the natural remedie crap.
I wish I knew enough about these problems in order to say something helpful to get the thread back to its original purpose. The only thing I can suggest is having a chat with the doctor - I'd hope there would be something they can do.
Sadly there are an awful lot of men who experience prostate cancer, so your husband cannot be the first to experience these problems.
Whilst I can't advise you on any medical remedies and have no experience in how the problem may be "solved" I would recommend a couple of techniques to "dealing" with it should it persist unsolved (or even if not, these are good sexual practises anyway):
1) Sex is not just penetration - he can pleasure you orally, manually and using toys and you can do the same for him.
2) Soft blowjobs are (apparently) bloody wonderful! So make the most of his softness and give him lots of oral pleasure
3) I do believe men *can* orgasm without an erection too!
So really, I'd focus on him feeling more confident and comfortable gaining pleasure from your sex lives - spend time finding *new* ways to enjoy sex and hopefully you will both feel really fulfilled.
Penetration should (IMO) be something you focus on later down the line - focus on general pleasure, then look up how to restore his erection - definitely speak to your doctor or a sex therapist for tips! I'd not bother with herbal remedies - they often don't work - so see your doctor, if any herbal remedies *do* work - the doc will know about it and be able to advise you safely (some herbal remedies can be quite dangerous if taken in the wrong way).
I have managed penetrative sex only a handful of times in 2011 and I would still say I have a healthy, happy sex life and my OH would certainly agree - definitely work on a positive mindset and you can deal with anything! Don't give up on the erection front, but in the meantime, try and enjoy sex as things are :)
We would never go for the Rhino thing. Never ever.
The testesterone is the problem as it fuels the cancer cells.
The doctors only solution is viagra or cialis, which give him headaches and he would need a big dosage to get an erection, but thats no good if he has a migraine for the next couple of days after.
Or some sort of implant but that is no good either and highly risky.
I do oral and he likes to get down on me but I tend to get thrush quite easily so we tend not to do that too often...
There are supposedly cock rings about that stop the flow of blood back into the body and give harder erections.
My hubby is old school and took a while to get him to like or at least accept the sex toys. I think he does not like the fact that I can orgasm with them and not with him. Not good for the ego. For him penetration is key, or whats the point so to speak.... Its not easy for him to accept.
It is obviously completely adjustable which is good for getting the right amount of 'crimp' in the blood-flow out of the penis (which goes through three veins on the top of the penis - one very visible on the surface and two somewhat deeper). There are some very stretchy "one size fits all - (including horses!)" types of rings but they stretch too easily to be all that effective.
I think cock-rings are a greatly underrated toy. As soon as you start to get an erection the ring ensures that the resulting growth is greater and also seems to increase the sensation of the building erection which give a sort of psychological "oh, it's going to work this time" reassurance. All useful positive feedback because the big problem with ED is, if you think you won't get an erection then you won't get one.
There are vacuum plus ring type systems which use the vacuum to engorge the penis and the ring to 'trap' the blood in the penis which are obviously a stage greater assistance than the use of a ring on its own. I have no personal experience of the vacuum systems so can't comment but I think giving one of the lasso rings a try first can't hurt.
Shame about the headache with viagra and cialis. I use cialis now and then too. I take it an hour before bedtime and feel lousy and go to sleep. The next day though, the headache's gone and gentle stimulation brings on a good erection.
Alternatives include: a penis pump. see below
Papaverine injections. Before sex you inject papaverine into the penis. This works very well, but you have to be careful about not hitting the urethra etc.
Penis pump: This is a plastic sleeve you place over the penis. You first fit a tight cockring over the cock balls You pump the air out and the cock grows. The cockring prevents the blood flowing away too quickly. Best results are obtained with steel cockrings. However, the user must have experience, as you must not leave the penis inflated for too long.
There is the implant option as well. This used to be available on the NHS in certain cases.
Regular exercise, healthy diet and giving up smoking all help as well.
Testosterone is available in gel form and may be suitable for some people. There is a risk of unwanted side effects though and users should be monitored.
