My wife is very reluctant to try anal, its been a long standing fantasy of mine to have anal sex with her, we have tried before but she is always in way too much pain before I even get the tip of my penis inside and the last thing I want to do is hurt her.
I was wondering if any one has any tips or tricks we could try to help her to relax and start enjoying anal ??
You should never go straight to anal, you should always ease into it. Firstly, you need to make sure you’re both prepared for it. You will definitely need some lube, and she may want to consider douching.
Once you are both prepared, you will either need to warm her up with a slim sex toy, or just use your fingers. Apply a generous amount of lube, and slowly start to play around, moving in and out, and loosen her up. Once she feels comfortable with this size, try sticking another finger in, and do the same thing.
After this, she should be ready to take your penis.
In addition to this, I recommend that she use some toys by herself, so she can practice taking your penis:
BASICS Slimeline Butt Plug - https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=16053
Lifelike Lover Classic Realistic Dildo 6 Inch - https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=22814
Personally I'd forget about 'your long standing fantasy' for the time being at least. If your wife is very reluctant she won't be relaxed enough to enjoy it and if you do try and hurt her it certainly won't help for any future anal antics. I'd opt for small toys 1st. How about a petite butt plug?
Without knowing her exact thoughts it's a bit hard to comment, but, you need to try and make this her fantasy as well. The fantasy doesn't need to be anal specifically, it could be about how much she's turning you on, or punishing her, or just being dirty. You need to find a way to make this about her.
She may be self conscious about having all your focus on a part of her body she isn't fond of, make sure you tell her how sexy you find it. Provide other stimulation at the same time, make sure you've really turned her on before even attempting anal, make sure either you or she is playing with her clit, try to wait until she is close so there is a chance you can orgasm together.
In terms of the pain maybe have a couple of wines first if she is a drinker. Definitely use a decent amount of lube. Don't use your fingers to start, even cut fingernails scratch and I guarantee she will be thinking about where you're going to be putting your hands next. Use a small butt plug to start, but try to find something that works to a similar girth to yourself. When you insert the plug make sure she's in a position where her legs are bent at the hip. Re apply lube when she's ready for anal. Maybe let her control things at first, going as fast or slow as she wants. Make sure even at this point you're keeping her fantasy alive.
You need to talk about it first, do some research together.
Thank you for your responses 😁 some great ideas to go by and some great advice too..... Greatly appreciated 👍
Couple looking to spice things up wrote:
Personally I'd forget about 'your long standing fantasy' for the time being at least. If your wife is very reluctant she won't be relaxed enough to enjoy it and if you do try and hurt her it certainly won't help for any future anal antics. I'd opt for small toys 1st. How about a petite butt plug?
Agree completely with this. Also, when you have your petite plug, try it on yourself or get your OH to insert it into you. For one thing, this will show you what it feels like and for another it might show her what is good for the gander could be good for the goose.
It's never something that can Be rushed into. The best times we have had have been with plenty of lube and preparation first.
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I love anal but shouldn’t just got straight in . I like to be turned on and my bum hole played with first with finger and just the tip and then little in and out and then use more fingers at a time Mske Shore she wet so can use her lady juice or lube and then why she playing with her clit you pop your penis in when she nice and relaxed and turned on nice and slow the more you do it the more you get use to it also introduce small toys I have small to medium toys now and I like to do anal on my own now so it’s a gradual thing . There is lots good tips to go on here but some woman just not in to it and mite be something you have to compromise with
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