Circumsision HELP!!

Sex Tips & Talk
1

My boyfriend was circumsised 2days ago due to infections when he was a baby that made his foreskin tight. He was in pain during sex sometimes and I alwaysfelt like he was holding back. So it was all done for the right reasons.

The thing is I've spent this evenin lookin for info about how long to wait before we have sex, and I ended up stumbling across loads of sites saying that sex isn't as good for guys after the op. I'm now really worried (for his sake) that he'll hate sex and be desensitised. I guess I need some reasurance that thats not always the case and if it is have i ruined things for him by reasuring him to get it done?

Also are there anytips for when we start having sex again? so as to not hurt him or damage him in anyway

Thanks

2

I don't know anything special about how long to wait after a circumcision before having sex, except to wait until everything is fully healed. This should be pretty quick because of the large blood supply to the penis.

About circumcised vs uncircumcised - I've been with men who had foreskins and who didn't. The ones with foreskins loved their cocks, and the circumcised ones loved their cocks too. As far as I know, your boyfriend will enjoy sex every bit as much now as he ever did. More in fact, because he won't be in any pain now like he used to be.

Men have been circumcised for thousands of years, and are still being circumcised today. If it really had that much of an impact on sensation, men would have stopped it aeons ago. They haven't, because it's really ok.

Your boyfriend will know what hurts him and what doesn't. If you're worried about hurting him, I suggest that you be attentive to his responses when you're together, just as I'm sure you always are.

Try to keep in mind that the sites which publish material about circumcision ruining sex, are mostly uninformed and are usually presenting incomplete and inaccurate facts. My experience is that both you and your boyfriend have nothing to worry about. :)

Good luck,

Lubyanka. :)

3

I was circumcised as a baby due to foreskin being to tight so wouldn't know what it was like with. However I can safely say that I am not desensitised, in fact depending what mood I'm in, the total opposite. Plus I have had nothing but compliments about how much better it looks to be circumcised. I wouldn't have it any other way tbh!

Anyways different people have different preferences try looking at this forum...

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/orgasm-army/sexual-health/12629-circumicised-or-not/

4

http://www.norm.org/lost.html

I was circumcised at about age 12, and while i hadn't had sex at that stage, masturbation was infinitley better before i was cut. It's a shame that your boyfriend was cut for what would appear to be a simple case of phimosis that can be treated homeopathically and without a knife, but money hungry doctors would never admit there was an alternative, no!

The hard truth about it is that he will have lost everything in that list above, and for a lot of people sex is worse after being cut. One guy who was like me but was cut later (so he had been shagging before it was done) rated sex with a natural foreskin as a 10, without as a 3 and after restoring a 7.

Circumcision is a pointless operation that serves no purpose in the majority of cases; in the US Doctors spout fallacy after fallacy about being better protected from aids and it being cleaner, but we're in the 21st century, we have showers, there is no reason why cleanliness should be a problem. These Doctors consequentally make a lot of money from both the operation and the resulting foreskin.

@Geordie Paul, without meaning so sound argumentative, you admit you dont know what it was like before so you can't possibly tell if you're desensitised or not.

A lot of what i have read suggests that circumcision was the norm in the UK up to a point where all the false reasons for doing the procedure were proved to be so. In the US this didnt happen, so over there its a cultural thing that is proving hard to kill. So many American women prefer the look of the circumcised penis and would choose to do it to their sons - they believe it is no big deal, but when anti-circumcision groups then pose the question to them 'would you mind having your clitoral hood removed' they pass it off as not equivalent and a ridiculous notion. Ultimately this is not the case, the clitoral hood and the foreskin are the same before the split in the womb takes place.

I don't mean to depress you here, Moomin, but i felt that you should at least have access to one side of the coin here. The fact of the matter is that a lot of circumcised adults will defend aggressivly that their penis's are better and not at all diminished in anyway, but the truth is that a large percentage of natural erogenous tissue is removed in the operation - to me that is really bad and unnacceptable in the grand scheme of things, all in the persuit of a quick fix (typical western medicine) or in the name of some medical fallacy that has been proved time and time again to be so.

However, your boyfriend may have no trouble at all, and if that is so then great. If sex was painful before then i can imagine that he shall be very happy. If it helps, after my operation i healed fully within a few weeks. If, however, he finds that feeling is diminished or begins to have a problem with premature ejaculation (many restored men reported that premature ejaculatory problems were solved by restoring) then you may want to point him in the direction of a few restoration networks. I shall post a few links at the end of this message.

I Can only hope that the surgeon cut him loose and retained the frenulum. If this is not the case then i would be seriously cross with them as the knolwedge that the frenulum is a very erogenous area is known to the entire medical profession.

I wish you both all the best.

http://www.restoreforeskin.org/

http://www.foreskin-restoration.net/forum/

5

apparrantly my previous message was deleted, although i have no idea why...

actually took a lot of time and effort to write that out, and i cant really be bothered to write it again to have it removed within minutes of it being posted. Obviously a mod deemed it neccesary for freedom of speech to be revoked.

either way i'll still post the links.

http://www.norm.org/lost.html

if your boyfriend chooses to restore:

http://www.restoreforeskin.org/

http://www.foreskin-restoration.net/forum/

6

Firestarter maybe the mods thought you were spamming - they get an awful lot of that. You're original message may still be in the system so you could email them. They don't normally restrict anything on here.

7

moomin, I've not been circumcised but I did snap my banjo string & that put the khybosh on things for a while. Make sure his hygeine is A1, it really does speed up the healing!

You just have to pratice other things until he feels comfortable to touch & move it, sit on his face, toy shows, bulding up to very gentle stroking of his shaft (staying away from the head). Don't chance anything further until he's comfortable withn the above contact.

Start off penetration slowly & try with a condom to sheid the delicate area, make sure you are wet/lubed to remove the friction. Take things REAL SLOW, it may help if you loosen yourself with a toy so you aren't tight on his member. Normally it would be a crap shag but after 4 weeks of frustration you'll both remember it forever!

Good luck, hope it works out for you two! Just don't rush

8

hehe thanks guys

I've spoken to him and he really doesnt care if he's less sensitive, he just wants to not have the difficulty and pain.

Thanks for the suggestions and reasurance. I'm sure I can still keep him satisfied :P

9

I think that's the most important point moomin that you're guy medically needs the op. Although there is obviously a strong group against circumcision I know, I think you need to look at individual circumstances and that in your guy's case, it may be something he needs. I've had a few friends of friends who I heard needed the op for similar reasons so it's pretty common. I don't know the outcome obviously though!

10

Hi Moomin,

What can l tell you, surgeon recently stuck three stitches in my leg, healed perfectly in 12 days. Having said that l hadto keep it dry, but presumably your other half is doing that already.

The only other pointer l have was re the insertion o a Prince Albert

11

eek....

where the instructions were not to stimulate sexually for between 4 and 6 weeks l think it was, this wasn't on me sadly, although l think l would have struggled with the no sex agreement.

Tallboy

12

I read a paper stating that phimosis is a condition that should never need medical intervention, and have read similar studies since. So there is a chance that the operation wasn't neccesary, although i cant say for sure, especially as i'm only making the inference that phimosis was the problem.

Again, moomin, i wish you the best - but if either of you find things are uncomfortable then you might want to check those links out.

13

As i've previously posted my hubby was circumcised about 10 years ago for a similar reason. The surgeon said it was the tightest he had ever seen. He was in incredible pain for about the first two or three weeks, I wasnt even allowed to undress in front of him as the slightest stirrings of an erection and i do mean the slightest was enough to have him crying in agony. Has he had the dressings removed yet? The stitches look really scarry. They start to drop out after about a week. Sex was possible for us after about 6 weeks. My hubby has become desensitised but that has become a slow process, So yours might not even notice. Each man is different. We were pleased That he was healed properly in time for our wedding 6 months later. That was embarresing asking the surgeon if he would be able to perform on the night. Not that he did but thats a different story.

Good Luck

14

I was done in April last year and was told 6 weeks before I should think about sex again. For the first 2 weeks it was the last thing on my mind anyway, would wake with the beginnings of an erection for the first few weeks that was very painful cos of the stitches.

Think it was probably 5 weeks after that I eventually felt OK enough, although the new sensation took a little while to get used to.

In the end, best thing I ever did...although wasn't exactly done by choice.

15

tallboy247 wrote:

Hi Moomin,

What can l tell you, surgeon recently stuck three stitches in my leg, healed perfectly in 12 days. Having said that l hadto keep it dry, but presumably your other half is doing that already.

Which leg TB... left right or middle?

16

Hey Moomin,

Hope this hasn't been causing you or your man too much concern. My boyfriend was circumsized as a boy (around five so I can't help on the healing times though his doctor or GP might) but he was a little bit conscious of it when we got together. I would recommend doing your best nurse act on him and just keep positive. Keep up with the compliments; tell him how healthy and hot he's looking since the op and make sure that he knows that when he's back in full working order (whenever that may be) you can't wait to try him out. As was wisely mentioned above, I would guess that he's probably glad to get shot of the darn thing and will hopefully, after the initial discomfort, be a lot happier now. As for my man, we haven't really found sensitivitiy (or lack thereof) a problem at all. The head of his penis does seem to be a little too sensitive sometimes (without the protection of a foreskin, I'm guessing) so I'm gentle with bj's, etc but it's never been a major issue.

Really hope all the comments help you both! x

17

I was circumcised a couple of years ago. It was about a couple of days before I could walk 'normally' I was just SO sensitive. Showers were unbelievably painful - its still a bit painful now.

Supporting underwear helped a lot - boxer shorts have now been completely thrown out (rubbing).

Sex - er - you're going to have to take it real slow after a couple of weeks, perhaps - let all the wounds heal first. Lots of lube with your hands at first - if he leaps through the ceiling then its time to slow down.

In the end he will be fine - he may require a bit more stimulation or a bit longer to cum.

18

I was circumcised as a baby due to infection/tightness, but I can certainly say that I have no problems with desensitivity, although I never experienced sex with a foreskin.

I don't think he'll have any problems. He could also find that in terms of keeping his penis clean etc, it's much easier that trying to clean underneath the foreskin.

Hope you both have a great time once he's recovered.

Russ x

19

Circumcised at a relative young age (4 or 5 I guess), totally happy with it, certainly seems the better option for me. Very glad I was done at that point and not later on when erections would have been an issue, can't imagine how much it must suck having to get done in later life and how much worse the healing process would be.

As for being desensitised, haven't got anything to compare to but seems sensitive enough, but maybe that's something that progresses as you get older.

20

I am circumcised from birth and though I obviously can't compare it to anything, I do not feel as if my penis isn't sensitive. I am very happy with the feelings and sensations I have.

Also, I genuinely believe it looks better and there is an argument that a circumcised penis is more hygienic.

As for sex after he heals...Surely he's going to enjoy it more even if it is less pleasurable (which may not be the case), as there will be no pain along with the pleasure. So if it's only pleasure now, surely he's gonna be loving it!

One last thing, I have heard that with a uncircumcised penis, lube is less essential for handjobs, however, I know that with a circumcised penis, a handjob without lube would be very painful...so when spanking his monkey in future....definately use lube...baby oil is good! x