Hi all in the Lovehoney community. A while back I posted a thread about feelings that I was going through about my ever evolving sexuality and had some lovely and helpful replies.
Having wrestled with my sexuality for years, I have just recenlty come to the realisation that I may have been repressing my homosexuality. Recently I realised that women weren't arousing me any more and I thought I would test myself with a virtual therapist video by looking at both straight and gay porn, and the gay porn gave me the stronger erection.
I've had gay fantasies in the back of my mind for a while, and for me, now is the right time to open the door to it and see where it takes me. To show my honesty and commitment to this, I have not hidden my sexual preference from Lovehoney members, and now intend to act on my desires.
I would like to come out and say that I do like looking at men's hard cocks, and that I also want to perform oral sex on a guy, swallow cum, and have someone penetrating me deeply.
I want to say to someone one day that I have a boyfriend, but most of all, I want to come out and say that I am gay, and very proud of the fact.
All I have to do now is come out to friends and family, which may take a little more time than this post, but here goes!
Well done Lacegurl, it's a huge step discovering your sexual preferences, and an even bigger one accepting them, so you have cone a really long way to get to this point and you should be proud of yourself. I think Lovehoney is a very safe place to express your sexual preferences and you know that there is a huge network of support for you here should you need it.
My only piece of advice is to look before you leap. (I know I sound like an old woman now) It's very easy to run headlong into a newly accepted desire, but please be sensible and safe, there are always those people who will pray upon your excitement and naivety.
I hope you find your new found confidence liberating and that your desires are forfuilled and enjoyable. If you need us we are here.
That's fantastic, it feels amazing to learn anything new about yourself and I can certainly understand the excitement.
I would echo what Fun Loiuse has said but also add to be cautious in your declarations at this stage. You absolutely have the right to be out and proud of who you are but in the past I have felt the need for huge announcements about who I am, only to find a little later it's not quite as clear cut as I felt before. It's fluid and not everything about you, doesn't always need to be a big deal, so treat letting people know carefully, although no-one was ever unpleasant to me about such things once said it can't be taken back. I guess what I mean is it's easy to get caught up in the excitement. From my experience I would suggest telling those important to you, keeping it as casual as possible, and outside of that let thing evolve naturally. I found I had hit the right balance and truly knew who I was once I felt mosyly a strong sense of peace along with the excitement.
Congratulations on finding who you really are! It's always new when you have realisations and start to become comfortable with who you are.
It took me a while to announce to my parents that I was pansexual, I'd once made a joke to my mum about bringing a girl home because guys were going so wrong and it did not end well! Now it's fine but it's sometimes a shock to people who have their own expectations of you - do not give a hoot about what they expect or want, at the end of the day you should be surrounded by people who love and support you and who only want to see you happy and loved.
AmyA & FL are totally on the money with their comments. Take your time to discover more about yourself before you decide who gets to know what, ease yourself into the world and make good friends with the right people. Most gays I'm friends with are the most loving and wonderful people so hopefully you'll find yourself in good company!
Thank you so much for your supportive comments. Because of your encouragement in a previous post, I was able to let go of all the years I held myself back. I now crossdress on a regular basis and act out my fantasies behind closed doors with my ever trusty realistic dildo, while acting the part as the girl I've always wanted to be!
While I'm waiting for my first real 'experience', I am happy to experiment behind closed doors.
Telling everyone in the community I was gay and sticking to it was a difficult thing to do, so thanks for helping me come out.