You guys I have discovered this beautiful part of myself! I am bisexual! I haven’t told anyone except for one lovely friend who is actually discovering her own sexuality. I don’t know how to tell my husband. I am so worried he wont understand. I also am not sure I am ready to tell him or my family. A part of me also doesn’t want to tell my family at all.
Any advice or loving encouragement? I feel like this is all very new to me still and I could use some people to talk about it with. Especially people who will be understanding.
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im not sure i would consider myself bisexual exactly, but ive liked guys for a few years now despite being exclusively attracted to girls most of my life, so bi is an accurate term. my family doesn’t know, and i don’t plan to tell them, even though i know they’ll be accepting (two of my sisters are pan and my babysitter was trans)
queerness is a beautiful thing, and discovering yourself and what you like is very fun. you can come out to whoever you want to whenever you feel like it. don’t stress telling everyone in your life. you don’t owe them that and it’s not about them. this is all about you
i can’t say how you should come out to your husband. personally, i would test the waters by talking about queer things without including yourself in the topic, like talking about queer media, and see what he thinks about it all
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I wouldn’t feel that you have to tell anyone in particular. My family don’t know anything about my sex life or sexuality, predominantly because they are pretty nasty and would try to use it against me. (All narcissists you see).
Others will be able to help with how to tell your husband. We are both pan here, so it was a simple matter of fact conversation for us, with no real shock either way. That probably isn’t much help to you.
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I can’t help with your situation, but @Siamesecult very recently came out to his wife with very positive results. Hopefully he will see this and be able to give some good advice for you. I hope it all works out for you, we all deserve to be happy xx
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@drippingwet I realised I am bi earlier this year too. I told my husband and he wasn’t shocked. I also told my best friend (also bi) who said she already knew! I haven’t seen the need to tell anyone else, it’s my life and they have no need to know, so don’t feel pressured into opening up to everyone! 
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A very difficult question to answer but I agree with @KinkyMira its an issue with you and your husband not the family. I would not be telling the family. You may be surprised as although you have not made anyone aware your husband may have his suspicions. I wish you good luck and I hope he is understanding and open minded,
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I’m not sure I can give any advice but I do want to say congratulations.
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I agree with @KinkyMira. You shouldn’t feel any pressure to tell anybody unless you feel you really have to.
Your family only need to know if this would be something that you would want to go public with.
Only you really know your husband and will also know best how you think he may react but either way, unless the opportunity arises naturally, I’d work around it and start to drop a few subtle hints and clues to see how he reacts. Open, two way conversation is absolutely essential.
He may be supportive or you may get the impression that it’s not necessarily something he would be happy about in which case, back off.
People on here can only comment on their own personal experiences, feelings, fantasies, wishes is thoughts on the matter (me included) but ultimately, it’s you who has to decide on next steps.
Good luck whatever your decision.
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I’m very happy that you’ve discovered something that gives you more joy in life. A straight man can’t exactly give advice on this front other then to say that more happiness in your life is always a good thing and I can only applaude you for becoming a happier more fulfilled person
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I’m happy that you’ve discovered something new about yourself, how exciting!
It’s also really great that you were comfortable enough to share with all of us here 
How/when/if you tell your husband is entirely your personal decision, but I’d like to share a few little ‘tips’ (for lack of a better word) with you;
Deciding wether or not to tell your husband is something that only you can decide. Even if you never want to be with a woman and don’t think that telling him is necessary - you might find it liberating having your true self known - or perhaps you’d find having a little secret thrilling!
How you broach the subject with your husband will vary depending on how much further you would like to explore your sexuality in the future. For example, if you would like to explore with another woman, would you want to do this solo or as a couple in a threesome type situation?
If you’d like to add another woman to the bedroom as a couple, what would your boundaries be surrounding your husband and the woman. Would you be happy for him to join in with either of you or would you prefer if he just watched?
You could bring up adding another woman to the bedroom as pillow talk after an evening of fun with your husband. Mention that you find women attractive, you are bisexual, and you’d like to explore that further together. That will allow you to have an open and honest conversation together which can be brought back up the next day to follow up with one another.
If you would prefer to be with another woman solo, what type of relationship are you looking for? Would it be purely sexual no strings attached, or would you be looking for a more romantic relationship?
No strings attached sex allows you to satisfy your sexual needs and wants - the love you have build with your husband is kept completely separate. Where as a romantic relationship will demand a more emotional connection with your new female partner and in turn will change the dynamic you currently have with your husband. This change in dynamic doesn’t need to be a negative change as long as everybody involved is aware of the boundaries within each relationship and that each individual has and nobody crosses those bounds.
When you tell your husband depends on when you are most confident and comfortable talking about your sexuality openly. You will have an idea about how your husband will react, but until you actually tell him you won’t know for sure.
Maybe he will say “yeah, I thought so” and you’ll both have a big laugh and a warm embrace. However, be prepared for him to have questions, you might not have all of the answers at the moment but be honest with your responses. It might take a few hours or even days before he asks you some of what’s on his mind, a question could come at a totally random moment, just try not to laugh if it’s a totally inappropriate time 
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The previous response from @chelsea29 offers some great advice, as do others of course.
I’m basing mine on one question linked to the lines from your post I quoted. How did you make this discovery? Is it just a realisation that you’re mentally or physically attracted to both men and women, or is it something you’ve actually experienced physically, either previously in life or recently - as that will impact how you base any discussion with your husband (I agree that nobody else needs, or has any rights to know.)
I ask this due to my own circumstances. I had the occasional same sex ‘dabble’ prior to meeting my wife through swinging. She knew this (it was in my online profile) and she’d also had similar experiences herself so there was no ‘shock’ to either of us and it was an easy subject to talk about. But prior to this I’d been married before, considered myself 100% straight and had never thought anything otherwise until I started to experiment with others once single again. It was initially (like many I suspect) something triggered by a combination of fantasies, things I’d seen in porn and eventually things I’d seen at parties and in clubs but once I embraced the notion that I wasn’t 100% straight I didn’t feel the need to tell anyone - I was single after all. Even now I’ve never told family or friends and don’t think I’ll ever feel the need to, the same way I don’t feel the need to share my swinging history, casual sex antics or any other aspect of my private life with them.
Back to my question though.
If it’s the case that you’ve come to your realisation based purely on feelings and emotions then it will most likely be an easier thing to broach with your husband than if there’s been any (new) physical activity that’s led you to the decision you’ve made. From your husband’s perspective it will probably be much easier for him to hear that you feel you’re bisexual, rather than that you’ve discovered this through physical contact with another woman, which much like if it was another man he would likely consider to be an act of infidelity.
He may naturally be worried about your next steps? Do you plan to act on this new discovery, as obviously he can’t provide himself the experience of being with another woman? Only you will know what you want to happen moving on, but the news itself may cause a similar reaction to simply saying you’re attracted to another man.
Take some time to think how best to broach the subject and prepare some answers to what may be expected questions from him, so he knows where things stand and that this isn’t just a whim and that you’ve thought this through seriously.
The most important message to give him is that it doesn’t change how you feel about him and that you don’t want anything to change between you. If he senses in any way that you do it’ll create barriers to having a full and open discussion.
Good luck. 
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I would just be open and honest with him. If you want it to be only between you and him then that’s all of the people that need to know.
It is a stressful topic to bring up for sure, but just reassure him of your feelings for him while you explain your feelings.
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I just had sex for 1st with a girl Wow wow and wow amazing
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Sounds like you had lots of fun. Keep enjoying. 
I will
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I knew I like girls aswell since young but also like men
Never been open to any partner b4 I met my boyfriend
We was just talking in bed 1 night and he just said that he can tell I like girls aswell cos he’s caught me checking them out and that I like lesbian porn but so does a lot of hetro girls
Told him I’ve never tried it with a woman so the man he is totally trusting and open said go and explore it otherwise it will eat away at me
Without he’s blessing I wouldn’t have had the guts to try it but im so glad I did and love my boyfriend even more now as he understood me and gets me in every way
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Have you noticed how he reacts when two women are passionate on tv? Maybe watch something together like naked attraction and comment on the women or a film with a lesbian scene in it to test the waters. This may give you more confidence to bring the discussion up. He may want to know if it is just sexual or romantic with some form of commitment or fwb, I think you need to think what you want.
As far as family are concerned, she could just as easily be a close friend. Anyway good luck and enjoy this extra side you have discovered.
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This ky thing to explore for now
My boyfriend been amazing over this and understood I love him for that
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Thank you so much @blue
I did start off like that as well noticing that I had a bit of an attraction to women but didn’t think much about it or putting a label on it till recently.
I think I am going to wait to tell my husband just till I think we are in a place he’d be accepting of it. I honestly don’t know how he would take it.
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Thank you for sharing. I don’t think I will ever really come out to all of my family knowing that a lot of them wouldn’t accept it. But I feel comfortable with myself and hope my husband can too.
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