We have been together years and are moving in together soon so don’t really have any secrets between us. One thing I haven’t told him before though is that I do watch porn. I started watching now and again when I was younger but for the last few years I have been watching regularly, and enjoy it.
I feel a little embarrassed about this however and that it is more normal or expected that a man would be watching porn rather than a female. I’m just wondering if I should tell him at some point and if partners generally know if their partners like to watch porn and vice versa?
My wife and I both watch porn separately. We’ve spoken about watching it together some day but haven’t done it yet.
I honestly wouldn’t stress over it. It’s totally normal and should be more normalised as you said.
I’m not really a porn watcher, used to be, but the ethics can get a little muddy, so I chose to stop consuming. Never really did too much for me anyway.
OH used to watch a lot of porn, and it was often hardcore. But they would get to a point where they were desensitised, and suddenly they needed something even more hardcore, and the cycle repeated. They started to get to a point where it all felt extremely fake, and nothing was enough.
Upon discussing our views early into our relationship, and their struggles, they chose to no longer engage with it either, we both give each other what we need, and are both willing to experiment (to an extent, we both have things that are hard nos in the bedroom). Only porn they watch now is what we’ve done and even then, they’re rarely on their own, so I’m always available
He would probably be thrilled to learn you watch! Maybe it could be something you do together from time to time.
I assume he watches it? And you’re ok with that?
My husband watches porn and the only rule i ever had was dont lie about it, if i ask just say you did/do. He knows i watch it too sometimes or well as previously mentioned listen as i like the audio.
Move in with everything on the table, i dont think you need to worry about him thinking its odd.
I used to watch more than I do now, more for research for things I might want to try or to see how something looks.
I would use our own videos for my own needs rather than porn, I’d spend more time finding something and I’d be bored but if I do find something fun, then I’d send it to him.
Tell him, its not a big deal and if you’re going to live together you don’t want to be having to hide anything. He probably watches it too.
We watch together, have even made many videos of ourselves. when I would travel for work she requested I make solo videos of myself for her to use while I’m away. We, or I, use it now to introduce new ideas. I likely watch more on my own than she does now. I will preview some with specific content on what I find highly erotic, we will watch together and I can get her feedback on that topic after our viewing together. It may feel a tad awkward at first, like masturbating in front of your partner for the first time, but in the end it’s almost always a great idea to share this experience. Be open and honest, you’ll be living together soon, no reason to hide it our limit your pleasures at all.
My partner knows i watch T-girl porn.She says she isn’t really into porn but i know she enjoys watching now and then especially if the guys have huge cocks.She is always frisky after watching a woman getting a real good pounding off half a dozen guys so i suspect she enjoys it a little more than she makes out
Newly weds here , 37 years . My wife is very guarded talking about sex in general and due to her disabilities we have zero joint sex . We do discuss sex and just more recently we have discussed watching porn and masturbation . She has always been camera shy . Myself not so much . I have made made mini porn clips staring myself and many toys . I send her clips that she might enjoy watching while pleasing herself . I myself enjoy shorter clips of specific acts that get me aroused . I am guessing only about 98% of men would be thrilled to find out their sexual partners watch porn . Mild warning about getting addicted . Similar to adult beverage and recreational pharmaceuticals , if you must have more and more and wickeder porn . You might want to quit altogether .
We both watch porn. Separately and together. We also tell each other when we do it. Porn and masturbation also go together and we discovered a liking for pegging when watching a couple doing it.
My advice is to be open and discuss your liking of porn and maybe suggest watching it together. It may open up discussions about what you like or would like to try together.
Yeah, we are very open with it now but we weren’t always - it was actually a really difficult topic for us in the early days. I felt like it was cheating, and it was a habit he’d had for 14 years so he found it difficult to break, placing us in a toxic circle of failure and disappointment.
But now I think after some work on myself and recognising how I have no right to dictate what he does in his private time, I’ve become more open to it, he’s actually watched it less and has been a lot less secretive about it. I watched some for myself to try and figure out how it felt, and realised it didn’t feel like cheating or that I was more attracted to the actors than my OH at all, which was my fear. As a result he’s also recognised how toxic it can be and as such has greatly reduced his intake so we have very naturally met in the middle.
Now we watch it together too sometimes, especially if we want some fresh ideas.
We are the same as above poster, in early days I struggled with his porn watching, as I felt I wasn’t good enough. It would make a terrible guilt trap.
Now I watch porn but not too much, we try and watch it together, he watches a lot more than me, I have accepted that and am ok with it, so he doesn’t feel guilty about it anymore.
Yes she knows. For me it was a process to accept it, I mean, to get out of the porn closet.
I explained her about what I like and that is not only violent porn what is out there. There is porn like Erika Lust, Bellesa, Kink.com that is sex positive porn.
And now I’m not hiding it anymore. I have erotic art in my studio, several books about sexuality and erotic art and photography, I even have a “Porn for Women” book, by Erika Lust signed by her.
I’m really happy about being hones with her and with myself about it. Porn is art, and like in any art, there is “commercial low quality” and really good high quality stuff as well. Let’s Normalize Porn!
)
and even then, they’re rarely on their own, so I’m always available 
