Fanny here! If you don't know me, I am a kitchen goddess (not like that Nigella woman... word of advice, Nigella dear- put the sausage down) and will be more than happy to help you with any advice or tips that you need!
Whether you want to make my signature Fanny batter (perfect for pancakes), cook the most succulent dumplings (great covered in Johnnie's special gravy) or just want some advice on how many nuts it is polite to put in one's mouth at a time, Fanny can help!
My first piece of advice to everyone comes in regards to the wonderfully naughty ejaculatingdildos.
Many people come to me and ask "Aunt Fanny, how do I create realistic semen to ejaculate from my squirting realistic dildo?" and to them I answer:
250ml Sweetened Condensed Milk 1 Egg White Sugar
Mix together the milk and egg white, adding the sugar gradually until you get the thickness and texture you desire! Full of protein, it's the best thing for a delicious and nutritious breakfast facial!
For those that want their pumping pecker to ejaculate internally, I recommend KY Jelly. This wonderful lubricant contains methylcellulose - the same stuff they use to create a look of monster ejaculations in the pornography photo-pictures!
And although not as tasty as Hartley's Jelly, KY Jelly looks and feels like real semen and has the added bonus of helping your delicate lady parts stay pH balanced!
That's all the advice for today but if there's anything you want to ask, please feel free!
I must go but I bid you all farewell for the time being, and may all your doughnuts turn out like Fanny's!
Thank you for all of the kind welcomes everyone! I will be sticking around for a while because it's my firm belief that everyone needs a little Fanny in their life!
Some healthy debate is always enjoyable so a question for you all:
