Most embarrassing sex session was probably after a particularly steamy session on our trampoline being ridden hard by the wife after a drunken session. Only problem was we woke my mother-in-law up and she caught us out the window. It was a quiet morning the next day when she hinted what we got up to, much to my wife’s amusement.
Also caught mid shag by my wife’s sister. We were shagging hard in the pub toilets only for my wife’s sister to recognise her shoes in the toilets. Still managed to cum and tick another public place off the list. It felt very sleazy but great! 😜
After me and an ex broke up we would often meet up and fuck still. One night every one was out at my house he came over... My mum came home and she usually shouts or knocks but she walked in on us naked just getting dressed.
Every summer we realise the windows are open after the event!! Last summer we were using belts,floggers, vibrators god knows what the neighbours heard!! Whoops.
A couple of years ago we bought a new mattress and the delivery included taking the old mattress away. It was only when they picked the old mattress up that I remembered that we just tuck wrist and ankle restraints under the mattress and they were now on full view.
They helpfully tucked the straps away after they'd finished and didn't say a word. Not entirely sure that they knew what they were, but I suspect they've seen everything in that job.
In my early twenties, I was seeing a girl and we had gone to London for a day trip. On the train Home she kept being really flirty and asked me to come to the toilets after she had been there for a few minutes, the Carriage was empty so I took the chance and we were both inside the toilet kissing and touching eachother. One thing led to another and she got on her knees, I decided to put my foot on the toilet seat to get a bit more room and in all the excitement my foot slipped down the toilet. It had an auto flush so as I moved my shoe went almost blue and we were both absolutely dying. I remember walking with one squelchy foot and the Noise made us both laugh hard all the way home.
Omg ok...it wasn't long ago either! I noticed this has happened to.someone else on this thread too...I can totally sympathise!
My Hubby went down on me and it was really, really good. I think I relaxed a bit too much coz I farted. I was absolutely mortified! It seemed to come from nowhere with no warning and it was terrible. It's not like he was a one night stand I'd never see again- I'm bloody married to him! 😂😂
I laughed and laughed for at least an hour, tears rolling down my face 😂. Luckily he saw the funny side too.
You shouldnt be embarrassed about queefs, its just air getting trapped. I am dissapointed when they editi it out of porn films, plus that makes it seem less normal. I actually find it quite satisfying, like that sillyputty in a tub that makes sounds when you press it :).
Being given head in my bedroom. Dad walks in and just starts talking. I asked him to leave as GF was still here. He argued that he had seen her go home for about 5 mins, she ended up coming up for air, popped her head out from under the duvet and said “ hi, sorry I couldn’t breathe down there”...
Second time, went to the bottom of the garden ( big garden ) in the dark to put the chickens to bed with the GF, we get a bit frisky and start standing doggy, 5 minutes in we hear barking, next minute dad flashes a 5, 000, 000 candle handheld spotlight down the garden, dogs run over and start barking. Caught balls deep....
3rd time, middle of January, bloody freezing, again get frisky walking the GF home, were walking down a little unlit pathway miles away from any houses I think it was about 11pm, place is dead. We stop and she kindly declothes her upper body so I can fondle her boobs with my mouth, I pop my jacket over her shoulders to keep her warm. Next minute Barbera and Alfred are barging past, with Alfred being scorned for appreciating my GF’s awesome boobs. They must have been in their 80s but their stealthy Ninja skills were amazing because neither of us heard them...
Mine would be telling my fiancée about any of my fetishes. Particularly when I admitted I have a glove fetish, followed a close second by my then desire (now fetish) for using motorcycle gear. Fortunately she has accepted all of them.
We had a weekend break in a small country hotel a few years ago. We awoke late and were enjoying some lovely sex when the door suddenly opened and the chambermaid came in, obviously thinking we were at breakfast. We were facing the door, doggy style and all of us just froze, her staring at us, us and staring at her. It seemed to last quite a while! Then she said "sorry, sorry" and left.
At breakfast she came up to us and said "sorry, sorry I not know" and we said it was fine, don't worry. We joked afterwards we should have invited her to join us, but that only happens in porn!
Ours in similar to this. We had put the "Do Not Disturb" notice on the door, but she still barged in. My OH was piling my ass at the time, and to his credit, he didn't stop or lose his rhythm. She stared for what seemed like ages, before I yelled "At least close the fucking door." It woke her from her daze and she fled muttering.
About an hour later, we had a grovelly note from the manager pushed under the door. We got our stay refunded (5 days), all the meals we wanted, and we got a personal apology the next day from a very embarrassed maid. I think they were very keen to stop us contacting head office about it :-D
Recently I was giving a blowjob whilst he was on the phone, the call went on so I took a breather and had a few sips of pepsi. I then went back to it and managed to let a massive burp out on his penis.
I was about 18 and my then girlfriend came round to my folks house on a Friday when my Dad had gone to the pub, we got frisky and her knickers were round her ankles and my head buried between her legs when Dad decided to come home early from the pub....the chair the gf was in directly faced the door and there she was, making eye contact as my Dad walked in.....
another embarrasing event was when I was working as a Navy Diver, we used to spend about three months of the year up in Scotland doing deep dives and were based in a little fishing town on Loch Fyne. The main hotel was run by a very 'accommodating' lady who had an equally 'accomodating' daughter...now, these ladies were 'well known' by most of the divers and one night the daughter decided that she'd taken a shine to me and that I was coming home with her...I walked her back to her house and we go busy, she then got a phone call from her bf who was away and proceeded to have a conversation with him whilst giving me a hand job...not conducive to setting the mood. Phone call finished and we went to bed only to be continually disturbed by her baby crying..this completely killed the mood and I made my excuses and left. Unfortunately, in the time it took me to walk from her house to the pub, she'd phoned her Mother and given her every detail of my less than stellar performance, which was then duly related to the assembled bunch of divers in the bar! I walked in, oblivious to this, to a barrage of catcalls and jeers......