For people new to the kink scene

What with 50 shades and Story of O being republished and one thing and another it seems that more and more people are becoming cool with kink.

There's nothing wrong with people coming from interest in these books but they are fantasys and aren't always grounded guides to an entry into kink, and it would be unrealistic to expect them to be.

So for new people to the kink scene I've put together some thoughts on the subject that I hope will be helpful to people.


that is a great idea, well done for sharing it. I think its really important to 'properly' educate people about the scene so they know what they are really getting into!

Thanks for the comments, I just hope it helps some people.

I think most of what I've put is just sense really but it seems the kind of sense that can get lost in the excitement of discovery. It's always a sad thing when someone's enthusiasm and possibly naivety is taken advantage of. Alternatively some people may even though well meaning step beyond what they should in an unfamiliar environment.

Sound advice, and common sense - which can get 'lost' somehow, in the newness and strangeness of it all.

I think people can get confused and overawed when the ideas of sub dom are around especially with someone who's only exposure is through fiction.

In any new circumstance people can be unsure how to behave and what is and isn't usual. Even more they can be unsure of their own place within an established group.

I was surprised at the amount of response these articles had when I posted them on kink sites. From people with experience saying they'd wished they'd seen things like this when they first found kink or from newcomers who found them useful.

I was surprised because to me, most of it is common sense, but my perspective is that of someone who's been around kink for 20 years, the perspective of someone who's whole experience is a book is different.