At least, I hope there are some "senior" people here, and you're not all twenty and thirty-somethings...
I've started this thread in response to a comment by MrSarcastic. He said that he'd read that as women get older and into middle-age their sex drive increases whereas men's decreases.
That is certainly the case with me and my hubby ( I'm 55 and he's 53 ) but I'd like to know of others' experiences.
What i read which was a while ago now is that men and womens sex drives are kinda in reverse while a man wants loads of sex in the teens a woman wants less and as they get older it swaps around where the woman wants more and the guy less.
Of cause this all depends on the person in general and there current/old sex drives im guessing some people never really change i know im still as hornay as i was 10years ago but then im only 28.
well until very recently mine had increased, husband used to say I had no sex drive current OH reckons its really high.
At the moment it has gone downhill but thats because of ill health, hoping when im better it will be back with a vengence.
Oh and im early 40s
xGGx
I'm in my mid-forties, and I don't think my sex drive has ever been higher. I think the main difference is that now I don't have the same energy and ability to cope with sleep deprivation as in my early twenties (although I didn't get any action back then, so it's difficult to compare).
My wife is a fair bit younger than me, and I'd say that her drive is still about the same as when we were first married, although she enjoys sex a great deal more now.
Hope that helps.
It's interesting as I read an article about how many relationships are breaking down in middle life as men find it hard to cope with their partners' going through the menopause. It paints a depressing picture of menopausal women's personalities changing ( for the worse) and their not wanting sex any more so the men feel rejected.
i wanted to speak up as it's not like that with me at all. I don't think I've changed except that I crave physical love and closeness more than ever before, even if it's only a cuddle. I never reject my hubby's advances. I can't believe I'm unique in this!
I agree with you Sally 54 i'm in my forties and my sex drive has never been higher. It may be that we play a lot more nowadays with toys since lovehoney has come into our lives and i honestly can't get enough!
Hi one and all
Mac here and was reading the views about us senior lot. Well I am coming up to my 50's and enjoy sex as much as I did when I was in my 20's. To be honest my drive is much higher. Through healthy eating and keeping fit, I am able to look younger and perform in the bedroom with passion,fantasy and naughty, using the books on position etc from this site. We all go through different stages in life... I think the hardiest is the menopause for woman, my friend is going through it at the moment, and not coping to well. So as both single, we get together from time to time to take her away from it and enjoy the wonders of fantasy, stops her thinking about it, and throws in excitement. I have not suffered with any penis disfunction(ie not getting the healthy erection in the morning or when turned on), but have discovered , that the main cause to this is over weight, fatty deposits in the heart, blocking the main channels of blood supply to the penis... get healthy chap and show the ladies what is all about. Great to see a forum put out by us, look forward to hearing from you all. Shame there is not a chat room where we can all get together. Hope you are all well
hugs
Mac :)
Hi, I'm early 40s and reckon I've mellowed slightly but my drive is still pretty good. Most teenagers suffer dreadful hormonal stuff, I remember having priapism (long, unwanted, painfully stiff erections which won't go away!) and feeling utterly tormented with unsatiated cravings and desires. Actual sexual encounters tended to be frantically stressful, sometimes ending in very disappointing premature ejaculation.
Nowadays I enjoy a very satisfying and diverse sex life, I'm more measured and relaxed in attitude, and I think women of my age are also more open-minded, adventurous and self-aware. We know what we enjoy, feel comfortable in ourselves, and knwo hwo to savour those pleasures. Perhaps we've met eachother halfway!
I think the biggest barrier to sexual drive throughout my life has been stress/anxiety/depression type psychological preoccupations. As long as these sort of worries are under control, I usually don't have any problems :)
We're both mid-50's, and have noticed over the last year or so a bit of a decline. We put this down to changing work patterns leading to less time together and generally being too knackered at the end of the day. There's also been a fair bit of family stuff to deal with on her side of things (elderly parents, house moves and so forth), which has been taking up a lot of time.
I'm hoping it's only a temporary hiccup though!
I guess we, being in our late 50s are amongst the oldest here and I have to say that our sex life is as good now as it has ever been - possibly better. So anyone thinking their sex life will be over by they time they are old a wrinkly can rest easy that it isn't necessarily so.
I think it's hard to disentangle all the influences to decide if our sex drives have changed much. I know my sex drive is knocked if I'm worried about anything. I used to work late into the evening quite regularly and I found it difficult to switch off and I'm sure that detracted from our sex lives quite frequently so now we are both taking things a bit easier (not exactly retired but more a 40 hour week than a 60+ hour week) and the children are fledged and doing well we can concentrate more on all forms of dissipation 8-)=. We certainly have a lot of very satisfying sex.
As for the ED thing I have no physical issues but I have had stress related ED in the past. I guess as you get older you start to worry that it might start to have a problem (the stats pumped out by the blue pill manufacturers don't help) and of course nothing guarantees the droop more than thinking you might get it - the perfect vicious circle.
Cuddly Hubby wrote:
I'm in my mid-forties, and I don't think my sex drive has ever been higher. I think the main difference is that now I don't have the same energy and ability to cope with sleep deprivation as in my early twenties (although I didn't get any action back then, so it's difficult to compare).
My wife is a fair bit younger than me, and I'd say that her drive is still about the same as when we were first married, although she enjoys sex a great deal more now.
Hope that helps.
Cuddly Hubby, I've taken a liking to you! You don't mind saying that you "didn't get any action" when in your twenties, and elsewhere you don't mind saying that your wife is the only person you've slept with. I find such candour so refreshing! You could easily come on here and lie through your teeth about your sexual advertures, but you don't.
I didn't get any action until I was 25, when I met my husband, but unlike you I have a huge hang-up about it and don't like telling people ( only anonymously!). I should follow your example and not mind!
I wish you and your wife a long and happy life together.
Im in my late 50's now and it's never been so good she only 55 and hot to trot like never before,wev'e been together for 32 years now and i can't beleive my luck she's so horny its unbeleivable and never ever say's no !!!!
sally 54 wrote:
Cuddly Hubby, I've taken a liking to you! You don't mind saying that you "didn't get any action" when in your twenties, and elsewhere you don't mind saying that your wife is the only person you've slept with. I find such candour so refreshing! You could easily come on here and lie through your teeth about your sexual advertures, but you don't.
I didn't get any action until I was 25, when I met my husband, but unlike you I have a huge hang-up about it and don't like telling people ( only anonymously!). I should follow your example and not mind!
I wish you and your wife a long and happy life together.
Thank you! I wish the same to you and your husband. External Media
I don't generally make a point of telling people in general about my lengthy period of virginity! It's not something that I'm proud of, but nor is it something that I feel ashamed about. It was just the way that things worked out for me, given that I was shy about sex at that time.
I suppose I could have invented a spectacular sexual history for myself, but that would have been pointless. I joined this forum so that I could swap ideas and tips for my sex life with my wife and, inevitably, I'm having to ask some naive questions as we both have no experience beyond each other. I think it helps for people to understand my real context!
Thanks for all your thoughts and comments. We're all different, but it seems that getting older doesn't necessarily mean a loss of sex drive, neither for men nor women.
I hope I've struck a blow against the negative stereotype of the middle-aged woman going off sex!
i hope so too Sally
i must say that when i'm reading the posts i don't think of you "senior" members as been old and you dont look old looking at your profile pics!
I like you ^^^
and i dont think of myself as senior until i forget what ................
I was saying
xGGx
ghostgirl wrote:
I like you ^^^
and i dont think of myself as senior until i forget what ................
I was saying
xGGx
I never forget what
My sex drive has always been very high
