So… Ive been on here for a few months now and its clearly a site with the most amazing people… You are so free and express yourselves to the limit (whatever that is). Absolutely love you all to bits and havent got a clue who you are… Guess thats the secret… I have created many topics and have loved the feed back… Its amazing and quite honestly liberating… The only negative thing is the trolling that goes on coz we all put so much effort into their questions… And this whole you cant do this and you cant do that thing… I even questioned it for no real reason at all and pissed off some major regulars to this site… and im so so sorry for doing that … I dont understand why one on one chat is not allowed… if someone else perks up then its 3 people talking… Does feel a bit like the Gestapo are controlling the people that make the site what it is … Put it in a nutshell… if we all close down our accounts tomorrow…where would they be…
The forum has been around for a long time, I think that the rules are there for good reasons, as silly as they might look to some.
The running theme is that the forum is a safe space to talk about these sensitive topics, without feeling like someone is going to cross that line and become suggestive or pervy. That line can so easily be crossed with these topics so I think the rules are in place to prevent the more pervy characters from making someone feel uncomfortable asking real questions and wanting sound advice.
Also, when you get one on one chats forming then it takes ages to go through a topic.
If you open up the forum in that way then I think you’ll loose the sensible “safe space” feel, and that’s why most of us are here and not on other sites.
Where as the situation you policed was not the same, there have been some individuals that have come on and it’s been one sided and unsolicited and have made someone uncomfortable so the blanket rule is there for them. Loopholes in rules or situation-basis rules would be a pain to police, and Brenna has enough on her plate as it is keeping us horn bags in check.
It is a shame the members you mentioned can’t pursue a closer friendship due to the rules in place, but this forum isn’t really for that.
The problem with one to one chats is that they discourage others to join in. And, sure the odd conversation getting taken over by a one to one isn’t the end of the world, but if it keeps happening then people are going to stop posting. Why would you spend time writing helpful advice when it gets swallowed up by 2 people just wanting a chat or a flirt? And how do you explain to new people that they have to achieve a certain standing within the community for it to be ok for them to do?
There will nearly always be a time when a rule might seem harsh in a specific situation but blanket rules are needed to keep the forum running and a safe space
on other groups I am part of one on one chats are forbidden without publicly posting “hey, can I shoot you a dm, [whoever]?” this is because you get a lot of creeps
Sometimes I can find the one one one chat rule a little frustrating, as sometimes I do like to ask a few more questions to a specific person on a topic. At the same time I am glad it is there as it does help protect members against pervs. The rules do work to protect all of us even when sometimes they are frustrating.
As soon as I saw the title of this thread I knew what it was going to be about
Some of us oldies had the pleasure of this forum having private messaging.
If you want one on one chats there is plenty of other forums out there. Yes it can be frustrating at times when you could need a bit of a one on one for me it was when I was going through a horrible breakup.
But in all this forum works well staying anonymous we can all ask difficult and maybe embarrassing questions. It’s about being safe and happy.
All of the above.
I don’t remember seeing anyone pissed off with you, so I think you might be projecting a bit there.
But yeah, the rules are for everyone to abide by, and there are plenty of other places if people want individual chats.
See @Davey123 you can start a chat and stay within the rules 
On the subject of one to one flirty chats, whilst some might get a voyeuristic pleasure out of reading two forum members getting each other hot and bothered, it is not really what the forum is about.
The forum is an inclusive safe space where individuals come together to discuss matters with like minded individuals even if they don’t always agree.
I have found it useful to broaden areas of my sex life which might never have been explored without the support of this forum or the experiences of its members.
Prefer the format of group discussions, there are other avenues available for flirty one on one chats.
I think the rules are a good thing, yes the one to one chats are good but overall thing are great, LH don’t get anything out of doing the forum really but it is a fantastic thing. Please please keep it up LH.
I would say this is far from a bit like the Gestapo trying to control people. Been on LHF for 6 months now and very rarely see people corrected, and when they are it’s more of a reminder and a please refrain from. Don’t blow this out of proportion.
Nothing wrong with the rules, if you don’t like them you can always go elsewhere. I’m sure there’s plenty of other places you can go to chat
I’ve been on this forum for a few years and have only had good experiences. You’ve been here 5 minutes and already told me to fuck off on another thread when I refused to give you the real name of an ex partner of mine who I have written about… Like what the HELL mate?? What do you want it for? Are you going to stalk her / me or something? Weirdo.
I think we all know who the trouble maker is…
I humbly suggest you get with it and engage with the forum in the way that everyone else seems to be able to, or perhaps take your own advice and absent yourself.
This forum depends on open, honest, like minded people who are able to open up to one another thanks to the anonymity it provides. There are plenty of threads which are just a bit of fun, but I have also seen numerous threads where people are genuinely helped. It’s a really positive community where people feel safe, but it wouldn’t take many negative nancys to spoil it with their moaning and personal attacks.
Those sort of people aren’t welcome here.
It
Sing along ‘Its me HI Im the problem its me!’ 
@Davey123 chill out bro!!!
I’ve been on the forum for a good few years and generally it’s a good place to be.
The one to one rule can be frustrating and yes I’ve fallen fowl whilst giving and receiving info.
Personally i found the flirtatious behaviour of the members youm referring to just a bit of light hearted fun and to be honest if a sexy recently single woman (ooops have i just given her away) started flirting with me i would probably have gotten carried away with it done the same as it would’ve made my year that someone found me interesting enough etc.
Hi, nooby noob here, I’ve no idea about past conduct, and I’m certainly not condoning the behaviour, but it all seemed a bit out of the blue like a personal crisis point had been reached. We don’t know what’s going on.
I’m not sure complaining about a personal attack before launching a personal attack in retaliation is in the spirit of the forum either. It certainly won’t make anything better or change what has been said.
Calm thy tits, flag it and wait patiently for a mod to sort it.
Why thank you, i think it’s okay for a 52yr ol… oh you mean that mug,well it makes it easier to put my lips to to receive its warm wet liquid…
You are certainly NOT the problem, at times there has been may be more like 1 to 1 chat but thats normally because of interest re Glasgow, Cardiff, Congratulations etc. Never has it been to get on personal terms with you. We all know that is forbidden. your contribution is fantastic on here @The_Little_Ladybird .