I've been thinking about this and i was just curious of any others would like to comment!
The main point i would like to make is that as a bloke i find that orgasms are a bit...overated? I find sex itself a very pleasureable experience and enjoy making the experience last but i always find that the primary feeling i have is that my body is working towards ejaculation! OK so this sounds obvious as that would be the aim and all but i find that when it comes to a climax i find it all a bit of a let down (no pun intended lol)!
I find it a very common sensation to feel very very different the second it happens! obvious side effects are feeling sleepy etc but i find that i hate the sudden loss of interest in sex and the discomfort of being touched etc! I find the conflict between my brain and my body extremely annoying and i almost resent my body for it lol!
do any other guys ever wish they could just choose to turn off their in-built biological hardware and enjoy sex without worrying about the chemical aftermath? or am i on my own on this one? lol
i hear what you're saying - i can be really into it, super excited and aroused by anything and everything and finding every little thing amazingly sensual - then just after it's kind of - pffffff - what was all the fuss about!
especially if it has made the place into a big mess or whatnot, before its not a problem, but afterwards the reality of clearing up or all the mundane side of things comes into sharp focus.
so in summary yeah i know exactly what you mean, maybe there's a way around it?
i hear what you're saying - i can be really into it, super excited and aroused by anything and everything and finding every little thing amazingly sensual - then just after it's kind of - pffffff - what was all the fuss about!
especially if it has made the place into a big mess or whatnot, before its not a problem, but afterwards the reality of clearing up or all the mundane side of things comes into sharp focus.
so in summary yeah i know exactly what you mean, maybe there's a way around it?
lol i'm glad i'm not alone! i've heard of all the "learn to have an orgasm without ejaculation" techniques but the idea of trying not to ejaculate seems just as annoying to me lol!
Some good points here, that I will tackle after shopping and writing a shopping list!
As for the main point, I'd say it depends were I'm cumming! A quick morning shuffle is just a nice wake up and generally a bit rubbish... An expert blowjob on the other hand... Ooof!
Some good points here, that I will tackle after shopping and writing a shopping list!
As for the main point, I'd say it depends were I'm cumming! A quick morning shuffle is just a nice wake up and generally a bit rubbish... An expert blowjob on the other hand... Ooof!
that is true! whenever it's hands on it tends to be just to get rid of the annoying tension and in my case alwys leaves me wishing i could get rid of the feeling without the act itself lol!
lol i'm glad i'm not alone! i've heard of all the "learn to have an orgasm without ejaculation" techniques but the idea of trying not to ejaculate seems just as annoying to me lol!
Its just frustrating! You orgasm but don't get the release.... I find it rubbish!
lol i'm glad i'm not alone! i've heard of all the "learn to have an orgasm without ejaculation" techniques but the idea of trying not to ejaculate seems just as annoying to me lol!
Its just frustrating! You orgasm but don't get the release.... I find it rubbish!
all the mundane side of things comes into sharp focus.
i also meant to mention: do you find that your mind reaches a sudden state of clarity?
i wish someone could make that an optional feature! howmany times have you wanted to work but your mind just feels to hazey?
that would be awesome lol
yes, everything seems very clear. I'd not thought of making use of this. Maybe it's the brain chemistry in which case there is probably a way to synthesise it! I'm pretty sure that when I am raging with testosterone it causes some fuzzy thinking and extra grumpiness and chest beating - afterwards this feeling is gone.
I know I'm not a man however I can relate to this!
I get sick of magazines that tell me that the big "O" is everything a girl would dream of and she MUST get it every single time she has sex....I don't really like coming. Sometimes it is AMAZING and I really need it. Other times it's a bit of let down and painful/achey (due to the sheer strength of my muscles - contraction during orgasm can be really uncomfortable).
I find it a very common sensation to feel very very different the second it happens! obvious side effects are feeling sleepy etc but i find that i hate the sudden loss of interest in sex and the discomfort of being touched etc! I find the conflict between my brain and my body extremely annoying and i almost resent my body for it lol!
With this - do you mean you feel different mentally or physically?
After WandA has come, I quite like to hold his cock in my mouth and make my mouth really soft (rather than the various tensing I do when sucking him) so it kind of feels all warm and enveloping (not sure if he likes it but I like when he does the same on my clit after coming so I just kind of assumed it was nice). After maybe a minute or so, his sensitivity passes and I can start to suck softly and within 5 minutes he's usually ready for action again.
That seems to work with us for the physical side of the "after come".
When it comes to mess - we keep a towel (the "come towel") by our bed so that it's always there for ejaculation/after sex clear up and if we've decided he's not coming in my pussy then I will usually swallow partly because I love it, and partly because I can't be arsed cleaning up after External Media
I'm a woman and I completely understand what you mean! I can often have multiple orgasms and keep going for ages when I'm on my own with my toys, but when my partner stimulates me, it's one orgasm and that's it. I'm always completely shattered after (while the OH doesnt seem to get that sleepy) and I hate how much I'm turned off after sex that stimulation almost becomes painful. Luckily, orgasms can be a while in coming so I'm happy to orgasm by the time they come, but sometimes I feel they come too soon if I'm really enjoying it, and I just wish I couldnt orgasm yet. Being a woman gives me the added problem that there's alot of mental in my orgasms, and thinking I wish I didnt orgasm yet means I dont orgasm at all, but I still get the tiredness and everything else that goes with it. Grr...
AdnaW doesn't always want to cum when we have sex, I initially just found that strange! How can you not! Its good and frustrating if you don't! I still don't fully understand how she isn't frustrated by not cumming... It can be annoying having the the 'need' to cum but with AdnaW being satisfied without cumming it means there isn't a pressure to preform afterwards, she'll usually just cum before me.
I too sometimes don't want to do anything sexual after cumming, not because its a let down but because I'm just so satisfied. I find it quite easy to get back into it if I continue to be 'active' straight after cumming. I'm sure there's more to say... but I've forgot!
I'm a woman and I completely understand what you mean! I can often have multiple orgasms and keep going for ages when I'm on my own with my toys, but when my partner stimulates me, it's one orgasm and that's it. I'm always completely shattered after (while the OH doesnt seem to get that sleepy) and I hate how much I'm turned off after sex that stimulation almost becomes painful. Luckily, orgasms can be a while in coming so I'm happy to orgasm by the time they come, but sometimes I feel they come too soon if I'm really enjoying it, and I just wish I couldnt orgasm yet. Being a woman gives me the added problem that there's alot of mental in my orgasms, and thinking I wish I didnt orgasm yet means I dont orgasm at all, but I still get the tiredness and everything else that goes with it. Grr...
Is it the physical or mental side that stops you wanting stimulation after?
Every tried getting your OH to very gently, wrap his lips around your clit hood and clit and rest his tongue softly on it. Then just stay there? It's really nice - like a little cuddle for a clit! It tends to get me back in to mood for stimulation fairly quickly too.
Not sure it'll help but might be worth a try :)
I do get the tiredness after coming too - possibly more so than WandA but sometimes there's nothing better than fully asleep together all tangled up :)
I'm a woman and I completely understand what you mean! I can often have multiple orgasms and keep going for ages when I'm on my own with my toys, but when my partner stimulates me, it's one orgasm and that's it. I'm always completely shattered after (while the OH doesnt seem to get that sleepy) and I hate how much I'm turned off after sex that stimulation almost becomes painful. Luckily, orgasms can be a while in coming so I'm happy to orgasm by the time they come, but sometimes I feel they come too soon if I'm really enjoying it, and I just wish I couldnt orgasm yet. Being a woman gives me the added problem that there's alot of mental in my orgasms, and thinking I wish I didnt orgasm yet means I dont orgasm at all, but I still get the tiredness and everything else that goes with it. Grr...
Is it the physical or mental side that stops you wanting stimulation after?
Every tried getting your OH to very gently, wrap his lips around your clit hood and clit and rest his tongue softly on it. Then just stay there? It's really nice - like a little cuddle for a clit! It tends to get me back in to mood for stimulation fairly quickly too.
Not sure it'll help but might be worth a try :)
I do get the tiredness after coming too - possibly more so than WandA but sometimes there's nothing better than fully asleep together all tangled up :)
Ax
That's a tough question, because it's certainly a physical thing that makes it hurt after I orgasm, whereas with my toys I'm usually in a mindset of "Shall I go for another?" Having said that though, the orgasms the OH gives me with my toys are usually many times more intense than the orgasms I give myself so I'm coming back to thinking it's a physical thing. After I orgasm by myself, it does feel a bit weird, but it goes away within 30-60 seconds and goes back to being good, but with the OH I have to ask him to stop if he doesnt automatically, since it's just too uncomfortable. I tend not to get the tiredness as much when I'm by myself either, again because I think it's the intensity of the orgasm.
I've not tried that before, but I'll tell the OH and get him to give it a try!
I often begin sex thinking 'We'll go for 2 today!' but after I've come once any thoughts of an immediate repeat performance usually go out of the window. I'm simply not interested any more. Isn't that a shame?
Give me an hour or two and I can be mentally 'there' again and the body follows.
But are orgasms overrated - not for me. I think it's the best feeling in the world - nothng comes close (forgive the pun).
I agree sometimes a let down. The sensations can be amazing and you feel like your sperm is going to blast a crater in the wall when it comes out and then .... oh no it doesn't its gone just as far as usual.
Coming as a man can feel like a bain. Such a bloody mess and if its on me I'd rather not bother at all. Love it on my OH though!
I think it's tricky/impossible to compare orgasms in terms of whose feels better men or women or even differences within the same gender! Other people describe thier orgasms as wonderful, amazing etc. and I would describe mine in much the same way but the experience itself might be totally different. Even if the sensations were identical the way they were interpreted and described by different people would probably vary too!
I have noticed that not all my orgasms feel the same...the ones I give myself are never anywhere near as intense as those during sex. Masturbation orgasms are lovely but basically just take the edge off the urge to cum. The orgasms I experience with my partner are deep, throbing releases that reverberate throughout my body rather than being confined to the area around my clit!
I think it's tricky/impossible to compare orgasms in terms of whose feels better men or women or even differences within the same gender! Other people describe thier orgasms as wonderful, amazing etc. and I would describe mine in much the same way but the experience itself might be totally different. Even if the sensations were identical the way they were interpreted and described by different people would probably vary too!
Got to agree with this, several of my female friends have described how they experiance orgasms and you can pick up on the common traists but I've always thought the same thing, that ireally doesn't sound like what I have experianced. For all were all supposed to be working towards the same things we also seem to be having rather different experiances.
I've found it really annoying when I've had a less then satisfying masturbation session and after it my body just says no but I really want to get back into it and do a better job of it, not feeling horny per se but still desiring satisfaction.
Just today it happened to me and I said to myself sod that and tried some rubbing and pumping on my shaft to try and get back into it, though all it took was one brush against my overly sensitive head to ruin the feeling and I never got anywere anyway.
Seems like what men have is really inefficent for long term satisfying experiances. It's a case of our bodies saying "Must cum ASAP," Satisfaction for ourselves or our partners be damned. ¬¬
Kinda makes you want to have a decent dildo with you during sex for you partners sake if you finish too soon. XD
