No I don’t think I would ever cheat on her. After so long I may have to move on.
No I’d never go to extremes to get my “fix” I’d just take a longer shower. So I guess, I’m just very horny pervert 
I’m just a frustrated guy for the most part.
So by that I’d say your maybe feeling more deprived at the moment rather than having an addiction perhaps?
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After chatting with you fine folks, I’m leaning more towards that too.
Yes I guess so and can’t understand why she is like this.
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That’s a good answer and shows you defo don’t have an addiction but just a slight above average sex drive, which necessarily isn’t a bad thing 
It sometimes feels like a bad thing, especially with the way I feel about my OH, even seeing her bending over to pick something up is enough to get me going. 
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You sound just like me.
It can be terribly frustrating at times can’t it?
Sadly when some women go through menopause it literally does drain them of all sexual needs and hormone which could be why she isn’t interested anymore but still it’s no help to you as you’ve not changed and have them same urges…
Has she ever considered about having any hormone replacement creams or things from the doctor to see if it helps regain her sex drive?
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Yes very. Will your wife do anything at all to help you out? Mine want.
She uses a cream but it seemed to help when first started. But it does or she is not using it.
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She will to be fair, but sometimes she will find any excuse she can not too.
It’s too late
I’m too tired
I’ve got to be up early
We are in the frozen isle in Tesco
You know, the usual kinda stuff
I guess just wait and see what happens.
As usual, my go to is communication.
There maybe be a lot going on with you wife especially if she is also going through menopause. If you can have an open honest conversation about how you are BOTH feeling maybe you can take a step forward some how. Or at least feel a bit better about where you are now.
(Mrs)
No worries.
It is frustrating, there’s definitely an emotional load on the high desire partner in terms of rejection and feeling burdensome, just as there is one on the low desire partner who may feel pressure to consent and even inadequacy.
Mental health comes first, but consider asking if there are other medications she could try that lack the libido suppression. Even if not, the effects can lessen over time, so there may be light at the end of the tunnel.
Worth looking at supplements too. Do your own research but Ashwaganda has been great for my partner, helps with sleep, reduces cortisol (stress) and is mildly aphrodisiac for women.
You are not alone, 
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Maybe ask if she still uses it?
Really tricky situation for you as I can imagine she’s got no motivation for sexual stuff which only makes it harder to encourage
I know I’m piping in way late here. But I can empathize. I’ve always had the highest sex drive of anyone I’ve ever known.
I’m not a sex addict though, because there are lines I will not cross, like cheating, or anything else that I personally consider unethical behavior, even in Open-Poly relationships. From what I’ve read you say, this seems to be true of you as well.
Therefore, if I were you, I wouldn’t worry as much about being a sex addict. I would worry more about being able to use that sexual hyper-drive to get what you want more from your partner. But without making it about you, or making her feel pressured and uncomfortable.
A word of advice that’s helped me since way before I can comment due to age starting at 18 on LoveHoney? Take that sexual hyper-drive and make it all about pleasing the partner in your life rather than about her pleasing you, or you pleasuring yourself while internally begrudgingly wishing she was pleasuring you instead. (There’s no condemnation in that statement so please don’t read it that way, it’s just logically understandable that it could be felt that way , and may or may not be true of you.)
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The absolute easiest way to get something from someone you want. Is to give them what they want first. That old adage, want to turn a woman on? The sexiest thing you can do for a woman is clean. Is true for a reason.
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There are many ways to turn women on that focus more on the emotional and or appreciative gesture side. That there are when focusing purely on the sexual alone. Especially if the sexual expectation is for the benefit of a male at a woman’s expense.
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Find these initially (non-sexual) ways to alleviate her burden load to give her time to relax. Or to have less stress due to anxieties and “expectations,” and watch what happens to her sex drive when she sees you’re trying to help her as much as yourself. It shows you’re thinking about her, and trying to help her as much as yourself. That goes along way in showing that someone is considered and cared for. There’s almost no woman would not appreciate that in any circumstance in a relationship. Whether it’s true of your relationship or not, I’m sure you can understand where I’m going with what I’ve said (or will say) in some ways that may resonate. Then see if as a byproduct the sexual climate changes. I can almost guarantee it will unless there are other issues in the relationship that are complicating things further.
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Think about it from her perspective. She probably cooks, cleans, does or has taken care of the kids, does the grocery shopping, does the laundry…and at the end of all that. After most likely getting home from work? Feels like the next expectation is that they are supposed to be turned on 24/7 and always DTF, regardless of how exhausted they are.
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Then try thinking about what she may be dealing with, especially with hormonal changes and the never ending insecurities as a result. The realization she probably knows she isn’t satisfying you like you would like because she’s depressed about it which is a vicious cycle. That she’s not going to ever be able to have another kid again before long. The possible fear that since that’s true her partner may look to find another younger woman and on and on and on.
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Sex for me has literally never been about me. It’s always been about the woman enjoying herself infinitely more than I do. (That’s my kink) -Pleasing past a woman’s perception of possibility for her. Proving that’s actually untrue for her about her limitations. Either that she’s imposed upon herself due to a belief as a result of someone honestly just not taking the time to understand, be supportive, and simply try. Or because of any other reason including trauma, medication, mental illness, or hormonal fluctuations.
To clarify intent, I’m speaking about my experiences with post (or pre), menopausal women, and it’s not a statement or reflection on your situation. If you find there is some truth to it for you and your situation though?
- Maybe this could help you with a re-channeling of that hyper sexuality that I have, which has paid off so well for me, but as a by product rather than the focus.
Specifically by channeling that energy to provide pleasure rather than focus on the fact I’m not pleasured. That’s the very reason I’m never (not) pleasured. Either I do it myself by pleasuring them, or they are simply almost never willing to say no because they know the expectation is more about pleasing them than myself.
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Mate, your reply is awesome thank you.
Cheating is a massive no from me… I have had it done to me in the past, and I would subject my other half to that ever. All I ask for in return, is the same loyalty.
I share the burden of the daily grind with my Mrs, without question. I do my part with all the chores. And sometimes even more than that. I’ll bend over backwards for my family. Often times at a sacrifice of my own mental health.
You made a lot of valid points though, which I will take into consideration from now on.
Thanks again for your wonderfully insightful comment
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