Seriously!
I have smiled, flirted, touched, listened, and I just don't think he gets it that I like him! His body language says he like me
We have met up / had a date three times, and he hasn't made a move, even when in his flat. We chat via text and email, cos he works really odd hours, like when we are all asleep , and meet up on days off.
Short of getting the puppies out and jumping on him!!
tbh i would make the first move in that situation. or just out and out say! but then again im not subtle at all.
Definitely best move is the direct one: say it. I'm not great at that myself because I'm always worried the feelings aren't reciprocated, but it is what you should do. It might be that he's trying to be respectful, or is scared if he moves too fast he'll make you think he's only after sex, so letting him know you're happy for things to take a step forward without it meaning anything negative will make him a bit more relaxed. After all, there's every chance he's sitting there going "she's indicating that she likes me, too, and I'm sending all the right signals, but she hasn't made a move!".
BashfulBabe wrote:
Definitely best move is the direct one: say it. I'm not great at that myself because I'm always worried the feelings aren't reciprocated, but it is what you should do. It might be that he's trying to be respectful, or is scared if he moves too fast he'll make you think he's only after sex, so letting him know you're happy for things to take a step forward without it meaning anything negative will make him a bit more relaxed. After all, there's every chance he's sitting there going "she's indicating that she likes me, too, and I'm sending all the right signals, but she hasn't made a move!".
I'm like this!
And the making him more relaxed bit rings a bell too, I did say after our last date that he seems rather nervous, he replied that he wasn't and that everything was ok.
Thanks BB, thats a real help and rather insightful too :)
I'm the same, so it's a miracle myself and BB got together ;)
We must have spent over a month getting flirtier and flirtier and hoping the other person twigged.
We really just assumed the signals were wishful thinking and the other person being polite.
So go say something or start something! :)
Rejection sucks, but you need to know either way.
Say something like, you gonna kiss me then? When I got with my OH I called him over pulled him in by the hair and kissed him. He didn't pull away lol.
With my ex I sat on his knee and said I'm staying with you tonight, his answer? ok you can have the bed I'll have the setee. bless him. I said no I'm sleeping with you. He got the message finally when I was feeling him up in bed.
I am a fairly direct person though.
I tried getting a date with him for today earlier on in the week, but he has organised to see his mam, so we left it.
Anyway, I sent him a text tonight along the lines of "How far in advance do I have to book up for a date with you? And what do I have to do for added extra's, like a kiss!"
Obvious enough??
Well we are organising the date, so he can't be put off!!
wettongues wrote:
I tried getting a date with him for today earlier on in the week, but he has organised to see his mam, so we left it.
Anyway, I sent him a text tonight along the lines of "How far in advance do I have to book up for a date with you? And what do I have to do for added extra's, like a kiss!"
Obvious enough??
Well we are organising the date, so he can't be put off!!
If he doesn't get that then I will lose all faith in mankind!
Peachy keen wrote:
wettongues wrote:
I tried getting a date with him for today earlier on in the week, but he has organised to see his mam, so we left it.
Anyway, I sent him a text tonight along the lines of "How far in advance do I have to book up for a date with you? And what do I have to do for added extra's, like a kiss!"
Obvious enough??
Well we are organising the date, so he can't be put off!!If he doesn't get that then I will lose all faith in mankind!
I tend to be naive and can sometimes miss obvious things, but I think even I'd get the hint with that!
Well hinting wasn't getting me anywhere, and I am not likely to initiate either, although left long enough I would.
Anyway off for a meal and the cinema, just have to remember the mints ;)
wettongues wrote:
Well hinting wasn't getting me anywhere, and I am not likely to initiate either, although left long enough I would.
Anyway off for a meal and the cinema, just have to remember the mints ;)
Back row, crap film, short skirt, job done! External Media External Media
Seriously, I hope you find that elusive spark. Whispering naughty things during the trailers might not go amiss either... Good luck!
you should see a scary film, then u have an excuse to cuddle up to him and get close.
Is it wrong that when I saw the title I said out loud "show him your tits" and proceeded to feel more upset at how little faith I have in men at the moment?
Anyhow, maybe he's just a little shy, and is worried that you're just messing around with him and he'll take it the wrong way? That's how I normally think about it when a guy appears to be "flirting" with me....
If he doesn't get that, I might be a little worried though.
I hope its not an elusive spark and he is just keeping it covered for a bit out of politeness and respect. There would be no sense in dating him if it was elusive :S and I have been on plenty of them, although quite good second time round with online dating, I seem to week out the plnkers before meeting them.
I do think BB has hit the nail on the head
BashfulBabe wrote:
It might be that he's trying to be respectful, or is scared if he moves too fast he'll make you think he's only after sex, so letting him know you're happy for things to take a step forward without it meaning anything negative will make him a bit more relaxed.
my experiance of being a shy guy around girls i like is usaly to resort to texting or just to bluntly say i like you and hope for the best. Or in the latest case when talking about meeting up for a second time i cheakly said "i hope i dont have to sleep on the sofa this time" to which the reply was "i didn't want you to last time"
Argh replying is frustating, 3 time lucky.
Mr M you obviously havn't seen me in a skirt Although I did do short shorts to a nice response however shorts just don't have the access skirts do. Pleased I ordered some new togs now!
Doug I don't like scary films, but Its not the film I want him in a dark room for.
Well his next day off is mine although nothing was said about kissing
wettongues wrote:
Argh replying is frustating, 3 time lucky.
Doug I don't like scary films, but Its not the film I want him in a dark room for.
thats kinda the whole point, U spend more time cuddling up to him than you do watching the film. If u have lots of contact like that then he might let his guard down a bit and open up more
wettongues wrote:
Anyway, I sent him a text tonight along the lines of "How far in advance do I have to book up for a date with you? And what do I have to do for added extra's, like a kiss!"
Loving this, thats perfect. You have to remember that a lot of us guys are just as shy and nervous as you girls are, and we just don't pick up on subtle stuff.
If this guy still wants to see you when you have mentioned kisses, he's in to you. Sounds like he's shy or lacks self confidence, so you may have to make a bit of a move. If you aren't up for just giving him a kiss straight off, try putting your arm around his waist while you walk together.
Hope it works out for you!
Any luck?
Spelunker wrote:
Any luck?
Our next day off together is not until Thursday.
