*** Smile broadens and fingers slip apart - eyes peek though the hand covering face ***
As an aside... if you continue to shave below the perenium area (as male or female) to remove hairs at the very base of the testicles and towards to bottom-hole area, you may wish to consider the longevity of this situation.
If this is a short term 'mowing' and you intend to allow this lawn to regrow - beware. Irregular lawn care in this area can result in stubbly regrowth, immense itching as the skin rubs and insanity during the course of your daily life. This may result in emotional distress.
No amount of Witch Hazel Extract will cool this...................If you want a bowling green lawn.... use regular maintenence practices.......
Ha ha ha ha!
Written very professionally there I have to say! Actually sounds like a leaflet to advertise your garden landscaping business lol!
Ste wrote:
Gilette do a powered product that uses their proglide blades and has three attachments for various lengths, both me and the missus use it. It's called Fusion ProGlide Styler Razor, it's in a plastic container and costs £15-20. Here's the link: http://www.gillette.com/en/us/Products/Razors/proglide-styler-beard-trimmer.aspx
Highly recommend the King of Shaves gel, it's very very good and low foam so you can see exactly what you are doing, there's a green one for sensitive skin that works very well.
The razor and the gel are the very same we use, my god
Ste wrote:
Gilette do a powered product that uses their proglide blades and has three attachments for various lengths, both me and the missus use it. It's called Fusion ProGlide Styler Razor, it's in a plastic container and costs £15-20. Here's the link: http://www.gillette.com/en/us/Products/Razors/proglide-styler-beard-trimmer.aspx
Highly recommend the King of Shaves gel, it's very very good and low foam so you can see exactly what you are doing, there's a green one for sensitive skin that works very well.
The razor and the gel are the very same we use, my god
*** Hand removed from face, stands up and straightenes proudly.....***
Lawn aftercare is an important area to consider also, as inappropriate use of additives and fertilisers may cause discomfort. For example, shaving these areas immediately prior to an intimate massage or use of widespread lube application might also result in itching and irritating results...
It is far better to 'mow' these regions upto 1 day in advance of further fertilising, to prevent scorching of the lawn and long term discomfort. Materials such as silk lingerie and non-cotton underwear may also cause discomfort as they can sometimes 'cling' to the newly moisturised areas....
Mowing the lawn hurriedly before leaving the premises in tight fitting undergarments, should be avoided as this will prevent scorching of these areas of grass.
Further advice should be sought from qualified lawn care professionals......
OMG I am actually laughing my head off. Too funny for words!
Very well written WildThing, I should expect to see articles of yours in Gardeners World magazine in the near future :)
Sorry but pmsl!
*** Pulls on green fleece with "Lawn Maintenance - we Trim your Quim" emblazoned across the back. Smiles and gestures to tool kit ***
The storage and care of Lawn Maintenance tools should not be overlooked in this area. It should be noted that appropriate care over the type and serviceability of tools in the bathroom should be considered before using these to trim the grass.
Blades should be kept sharp and free from debris. Razors should be renewed when blunt and always be wary of nicks or variations in the blade line, as these will, in turn, cut the mowing surface inadvertently. You should only use the blades attached to the mower, do not try to cut costs by using imitation blades as these will compromise the cut quality. Mower heads are not interchangeable.
After use, you should always ensure that hairs are removed from the blades carefully, using fine tweezers if necessary. The razor should be stored upside down, especially varieties like Venus and the ultra glide variety as these will stick to other surfaces. Drying upside down also allows water to drain from and run off the blade, keeping them in better condition.
Try to avoid tapping the blade on the sink, shower or bath surfaces as this will dent and damage them. Instead shake the blade vigorously under flowing water to remove loose hairs. A garden water feature is not a suitable source of this flow.
Following these steps will ensure careful and trouble free maintenance of your lawn without the problems associated with inadequate blade care.
I am actually crying with laughter, what can I say to that!
Absolutely brilliant, well written and a proper giggle!
Nice one! :-)
Thanks Sarah 77 - you are too kind! :)
:) :) Loving the profile pic too....
Just wondering..... is there any more "topics of advice" that I could add to this.............. :/
Cheers! I spend a lot of time upside down lol
Erm, I don't know! Thinking cap on.....
Well.... I'm not sure I could do it..... but good one you.... Hi by the way.
Get thinking.... Everyone else.... any ideas on shaving questions?
I can confirm that it is thee hardest form of fitness to partake in, you use every single muscle that exists in your body to do it. Thanks dude and hi! :-)
Yes input people, we need more of WildThing's humorous adverts lol!
Lol I know right? I think I am now an expert after reading all that!
Anyway, bought a Wilkinson Sword Bikini thingy majiggy today with a razor at one end and a trimmer on the other. A two in one lol
*** Raises eyebrows at the sound of this discussion... "Two in one" you say ***
As with many lawn care activities and garden maintenance tasks, multitasking should be generally avoided, as many of the tools and devices yielded around the garden (& bathroom) could cause serious injury if misused.
The prospect of "Trimming" and "Mowing" simultaneously is not advised as adverse lawn patters may be created which are difficult to undo. In addition, borders surrounding the "Mowing" area might become disturbed if you are wielding two tools at the same time.
When using an electric strimmer device, ensure that the 'grass' to be trimmed is soft and unmatted. Preferably conduct this after a bath as the hair follicles will be softer and easier to manipulate. The trimmer should be used alone, without the "Mower" operating at the other end. This will prevent areas of the garden from becoming unnaturally mown while trimming commences!
When you have finished "strimming" - remove excess hair from the strimmer device. If allowed, you may be able to wash this under running water - check the garden tool maintenance manuals for this advice. Strimming hair to a short length will make for easier shaving of this as the razor will not become clogged so quickly.
LOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!
Very clever and very funny! 10/10!!!!
:) :) :) :) Glad you liked it.... informative and entertaining.....
Indeed it was! Entertainment value 100%!
Scorpius12 wrote:
Hi Sarah - I have tried everything over the years, veet, wax and wet shaving but have had issues with all of them. I then found a great little electric shaver and I have never looked back. I use it everywhere, bikini line, legs and underarms. It really does make things silky smooth - I wish I had found it years ago.
It is a 'Braun PocketGo M90 MobileShave Portable Shaver with Smart Foil'. I use rechargeable batteries and they last ages.
Hope this helps :)
This is an excellent shaver. Dust a little baby powder (not too much, just a dust, wife uses a make-up brush on us). Every day or another does it; five minutes and we're done.