Hello again, another query! I've searched the forums but I can't find anything that quite fits this question. Basically it takes my OH forever to come from oral. He loves it, I love giving it to him (and really really love when he comes in my mouth), but we've kinda given up on it a bit for the moment as it can take so long - half an hour to forty five minutes by which point my jaw is really stiff.
I've been reading around all the advice on the forums and tried a lot of it, but it doesn't help. So I don't drive you all away saying "tried it", here's the gen...he really hates masturbating and never does. As my sex drive is epic, this suits me fine, but it means he doesn't know what hand movements he likes especially as his exes hated going down on him. He's really really quiet normally during sex - a gasp is rare, words rarer so I can't gauge what he likes, and when I ask he says everything.
I've tried kissing, licking, sucking, taking it deep (although he's a bit big so I can't do that much), different rhythms, playing with his balls (although I think I'm doing it wrong - he says it's uncomfortable), using my hands to stroke his shaft, different pressures, vibrators on my cheek, perineum pressure, humming, sucking it after he's been in me (this would work better but we always get caught up and forget), teasing him with striptease, playing, photos and videos (of me...we're both not so hot on porn). I haven't tried P spot massage - anal floats my boat but not his.
I'm out of ideas!!! And so are the forums I've found. I enjoy giving him head and if it takes so long, oh well, it's definitely worth it in the scheme of things - he goes down on me a lot, so I like to return the favour. But I'd quite like not to have such an aching jaw...any thoughts? Lxx
I cant think of anything that yoiu havent already tried except for maybe something like this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=7478 It will save your jaw and you can use it together,teasing his mouth and body as he uses it.
@ Phoenix - that's actually a good idea. We use a lot of toys anyway, so maybe I could persuade him to think about one of these. I could at least use it to start him off!
@WandA - We've had a lot of chats about it and he just really hates masturbating - says he can't get anything from it. It doesn't bother me at all - I have a higher sex drive than him as it is and I love playing. There are things I don't like and he is fine with that so I don't see why I should make an issue of it. It could be the relaxing perhaps - he says he's very scared of hurting me or making me gag which I guess makes him tense. I've chatted to him gently about it to ask what he would like so I guess he may also feel under pressure. I just want to make him feel good.
Are there any particular positions that you like it in? We tend to go with lying on our sides with me shuffled down the bed. I did try kneeling with him sitting / standing but my legs went to sleep! He's quite big so something like him on top might not work so well. Also, do you think trying it a few times after massages / wine / hot bath or something might work better? I think it's in his head, so maybe relaxing him so he can fully enjoy it a few times might help in future. What do you think? Thanks Lxx