So… ive had some health issues that involed the lady organs. Pretty serious and have ended up with nephrostomy bags (drains through my back into my kidneys) …
My partner doesnt want to touch me. He says he doesnt want to hurt me but i also think a mixture of being a bit unattracted to me right now.
But ya girl needs something.
What do you lot suggest so i can have my own fun, moneys tight, id have to hide the purchase some how.
Thanks!
I’m sorry to read the trouble you’ve been having with your health and your partner.
I would recommend a wand or a clit suction toy, going by your profile name, I’m guessing you want something quiet so that the kids don’t hear it. A lot of people enjoy the Rose. My personal favs for the clit suction would be this Mon Ami stimulator or the Pro40 it is a bit pricier though. For wands, this Mon Ami wand is a really good alternate to another fav of mine, the Mantric wand which is a wee bit more expensive. They’re fairly similar. I hope you show your partner what he’s missing out on when you get your toy 
Sorry to hear you have had a rough time .
How long has it been ? Your husband probably is worried about hurting you or knocking /pulling something if its still quite a new thing , but of course you are thinking he thinks it ugly he doesnt find me attractive anymore .
I am a fan of the rose for solo use but it works with help as well , so if he sees that you can and want to play he can join in and who knows where it could lead , they are hand size so a good size to hide , if money is an issue a simple bullet can work wonders and again small and discreet and a good price .
Of course there is the old advice of having a chat with him which is easier said than done .
Stay strong , look after (all of) yourself .
My mum has kidney issues and has had the bags for a good year now so know exactly what you must be going through, her doctors have basically said she’s not ill enough for a transplant. So it’s a weird case of hoping she can get worse to get better. NHS boggles my mind at time.
Might be worth using the filters and putting low to high and seeing what tickles your fancy, the basics rabbit is £10.99 at the minute.
I’m sorry to hear of the health issues @Notjustamum but you are still here with us!
I take issue with the post title ‘not sexy no more’…of course I don’t know you but you are still YOU. I’d bet that anyone who took the time to search this forum out, sign up for access and post here is most certainly SEXY in their own way.
I’m hopeful that his avoidance it is only because he doesn’t want to hurt you. he is still with you thru all of this, right? please take some time to communicate your wants and needs with him.
as far as solo toys go there are plenty to choose from. My OH cums very quickly with the Womanizer Pro40 clit sucker, there are many options of those to choose from. not knowing your preferences it would be tough to come up with a shopping list for you.
wishing you all the best in this and welcome back after so many years!
As a husband, if my wife went through something, in your own words was “pretty serious”. The last thing is be even contemplating is sex. Yes, I would also be afraid of hurting her.
So maybe it’s just that and nothing else.
I think I’d agree here, if my wife went through something like this then I’d be scared to hurt her, whether or not this is the right answer I don’t know, but it’s how I feel
I guess I would try to give my wife time and let her open up on what she wants, than trying to chance my luck as such so the only advice I can give is open up your feelings and what you want
Not sure this helps, I pride myself on being an idiot at times and doing the wrong thing……so apologies if this doesn’t help
So, if you have needs, so does he and how are those being satisfied? Now I’m not suggesting that should be your top priority at present, more assuming he is likely taking care of them himself. So if he is afraid of hurting you, get a toy and when it arrives, let him know you have it and have a talk about either being given time alone to use it or having mutual masturbation sessions.
Now he might be a bit sheepish about masturbating and nervous about doing it on front of you, but as you said a girl has needs and its important in your ongoing mental and physical health these are taken care of, make this a big part of your conversation.
My wifes favourite is a bullet, small and cheap, recent got a clit sucker and she is still getting use to it, she indicated it gave a more intense orgasm but wasn’t as easy to get it.
Totally agree with @WonderDownUnder
Ask him if he would like to join you for a mutual masturbation session - that way he doesn’t have to worry about hurting you, and I’m sure you can get a pretty good view going for him!
Also, with a good wand or bullet, it’s pretty easy for your partner to get involved in that action.
So sorry to hear about your health issues.
Be kind to yourself and hope you both have some good fun adventures in the bed coming up!