Also apologies if I came accross a bit harsh. Sometimes we all need a rocket up our bums to get us to take action otherwise we would settle for the easy way out ie doing nothing . It just brought back memories when my dad had to do the same to me to get me to end an engagement that wasn't going any where. I was doing nothing and delaying the enevitable.Different cicumstances to yours I know.
God luck
Thank you for being there all you guys, I haven't had anyone to talk to about it so I thought I'd post on here and I'm glad I did.
Thank you and I'll let you know how we get on Friday
I do hope you work it out. It is so sad when excessive work commitments get in the way of relationships.
Boogaloo wrote:
Hey Dan, I'm so sorry this has happened to you :(
It doesn't sound to me like you've done anything wrong, although without being there it's impossible to know. From an outsiders POV it sounds like a fairly trivial fight, so perhaps there's something else going on that she doesn't feel ready to talk about. Has she shown any signs of depression etc? Sorry if that sounds judgemental, but when I've had bouts of depression I've always pushed people away when they've tried to help.
Really it's hard to advise, if she's asking for space then do your best to give it to her, it might do you both some good. I appreciate how hard it must be for you at the moment, I've been in a similar situation with an ex partner before and it's horrible sitting at home worrying about everything. In the mean time perhaps try some meditation or yoga to calm you down. You could even look in to some essential oils like Lavender, or try taking a herbal extract like Valerian Root to soothe you.
Hope things work out for you both x
+1 I agree with this...
It's hard and hun it sounds like you have put so much effort into the relationship and saying sorry but i think she needs space to get her head around it. If she is still talking to you though like you said she said i love you back? Then i think you will find that means she still wants to know you and everything.
I know how it feels to hurt and feel alone. But worrying will maker it worse and your more likley to do something you regret like rin round to her house begging which would only push her away more. Boo has some great tips here to help you calm xx
Are you sure she's working 85 hrs?
What do you mean stuburns??
If things aren't right in a relationship and my missus was always 'working' first thing I would do is check she was actually working those hours.
My mate is manager at a bookies. Never would he work 85 hrs a week on salary. That's 17 hours a day 5 days a week. Seems a little too much work that.
I know she is defo working because I used to drop her off and pick her up and a few family friends use the shop and they always say she's there and my local pub is opposite and I sometimes go in there after work and I see her in there
👍🏼
In that case then she is working far to many hours and it can't possibly be good for her. When she comes home is she having to do all the extra housework too?
No she lives with her parents, I used to drop her off at her house we used to text for an hour or so after and then she went to sleep.
Personally I think this over working situation is only temporary until vacancies can be found but until then she is the manager and its her responsibility in ensuring the shop is run . So she is the one making the sacrifices as often hands on managers do .
However as part of your chat on Friday I would make enquiries on how long this is likely to continue as I am sure it breeches EEC regulations on excess hours. so it can't carry on indefinately .
If everything goes well and i anticipate that happening why not start the ball rolling of getting shacked up together . I think living with your parents in a long term relationship can do damage to that relationship looking at the longer term .Living together will give you more closeness and more challenges then you can decide for sure that you are both compatible before making that next very big step.You can't beat an argument of who pays the elctricity bill !
Sounds to me you were doing your best to look out for her and wanted her time which is natural.. I say you've done absolutely nothing wrong, although id say shes shattered emotionally, physical n we all know we can take it out on our closes..
I hope your Friday meeting does well, tread carefully along the subject of work.. I wouldnt b inclined to go all guns blazing I.e you working is pulling us apart etc
This may just piss her off she sounds like shes under a lot of pressure in her difficult position.ask her how she feels etc n prehaps plan a mini break in a nutural place just 4 the two of u
Good luck.. x
The time has come, only an hour left and I'm absolutely sh*ting myself.
Good luck and chill x
You'll be fine mate . Just keep yourself calm and listen to what she has to say. I am pretty sure she will want to apologise and make things right between you .
This is normal. We have been together 6 years we argue like cat and dog almost to the point we cannot stand the sight of eachother during times when one or the other os working too much. Its normal. She will be tired and stressed. And who do we all take it out on the most? The personrson closest to us. i think we do this without realising how much we are affecting the mood of the poor partner that has to sit there and deal with your stress second hand.
Good luck friday..
Talk talk talk xxxxxx
Im pretty sure anything more than a 12 hour shift is against the law and she should just tell them no, or as someone else has said are you sure shes there and not playing around my advice move on plenty more fish in the sea as they say