I am creating this thread because I want to talk about what kind of partners women prefer in general. Does age matter? If not, what does matter for a date, a partner or just having a "friend" with benifitsWhat do you specifically think about men of this sort I was reading about http://blog.sugardaters.co.uk/2014/08/favourite-sugar-daddies/
Does it ring bells in your ears when you hear the word sugar daddies. I am more interested in discussing about relationships and sex encounters where age gaps were/are big.
Age is a big deal for me. I've never dated someone younger than me, I just think men don't mature as quickly as women, so I've always gone for men that are the same age as me of slightly older. I wouldn't date someone who was more than 5 years older than me. My husband is only slightly older than me, and I find we have so much more in common because we're close in age.
I think sugar daddies aren't just about age, they're about a well established indipendant man, and this aspect is really appealing to me. I've got a very fine successful gentleman as a husband so I suppose I already have that aspect. But age really is a huge deal for me. Some people don't understand it and say age is just a number, and it's great people can have that additude, but it just doesn't work for me.
If it makes the individual happy then whats wrong with it?
theres a lot of things I read about and think "hell no!" or "thats disgusting" but this forum has taught me that there are many different types of people that enjoy lots of different things.
we are all different. if we were all the same we would be very boring.
what one person may like, another will not.
(this was a very mature response from me, doesn't happen often lol!)
This is definitely a topic that is going to show a very diverse response!
Age: Personally I prefer men who are older than me ( I'm 21 and I am still attracted to men in there 50's and even older... it depends on the guy ) and women who are around my age or only a few years older than me ( max of 5 years older ). Even though I like older guys that doesn't disqualify men my age and a bit younger!
On a Date / Spoiling : I'm one of those girls who gets bashful if somebody spends to much money on me. If I had my way I would either pay for my own dinner/movie/ect. Or even paying for one of the events. That being said, the money isn't what matters to me. It all matters how they treat me, the people around us, and if they know how to laugh.
My first boyfriend was 2 years older, never thought i'd consider same age, never mind younger, but i'm a month and a half off my 25th birthday, my current partner whom i started dating a week after my 22nd birthday will be 20 in 3 weeks, and it's never bothered me in the slightest. It made me realise pretty quick age really is just a number and its who they are that matters.
Do i agree with either sex dating someone of any age solely for their money though, absolutely not.
The term "sugar-daddy" has very negative connotations for me as it implies an imbalance in the relationship; I think of Bernie Ecclestone or Peter Stringfellow and their string of glamourous younger girlfriends, ugh. Not an equal partnership, though hard to decide who is using who.
In terms of age gaps, my husband is 8 years older than I am. Had we met when I was in my teens that might have been a gap too far, but we married when I was in my late 20s. As you age the relative gap gets smaller though it sometimes feels odd to be married to an OAP!
My boyfriend of almost 6 years is 7 months younger than me (so we were in the same class at school). He is less mature in some ways, but I like that! He's very funny, isn't afraid of making a fool of himself, and is very relaxed. But he is also independant and motivated and quite traditional in thinking the man should financially look after his woman :) I think its more important to be with someone you love and that makes you laugh!
I think that relationships of the sugar daddy nature may or may not be related to the age gap. Sometimes you can get a wealthy guy in his late 20s (usually someone with rich parents, or someone with somewhat shady business doings, or a successfull athlete or someone like that) who is obviously "buying" affections of attractive girls only slightly younger than themselves who are not really in love with those chaps but who love to be spoilt with gifts and expensive vacations, such girls often don't do much else than care about their dresses,make-up and slim bodies which are essential to their success - should they look just a little less "representative", those guys would go elsewhere... Feels like a sugar daddy relationships to me, even though such people are roughly the same age.
On the other hand, I know a lady historian in her mid 30s who was always too mature and too smart for her peers (she hadn't manage to find anyone as a student, nor as a young academic) - she is married to a 70 year old professor and has a little daughter with him. While the age gap does indeed feel odd and while I would not think it is entirely responsible to have kids at that age (Will he live enough to see the girl grow up? Obviously, even a young father can die, accidents and illnesses can take care of that, but in this case, this question pops in one's mind very easily indeed...), I would not say their relationship is of the sugar daddy variety, they are well-matched intellectually, the lady is wise for her age and they are both successfull in their careers. Another example would be another couple of historians (my mum's a historian and knows both couples from seminars.) - ages ago, he was a bit over forty when he married a girl twenty years his junior. That was quite a shock to various unmarried 30-someting year old clerks who had been after him. These days, the old fellow is 94 and his wife of fifty years is in her mid 70s and all the people claim they are the loveliest old couple ever. Again, they were well-matched and their relationship was an actual partnership.
Extreme cases, sure, but I hope this illustrates that the "sugar daddy" issue is about more than just about the age. Age may play its part, definitely, and it often actually does. Personally, I feel a bit nervous about guys more than 8 years or so older than myself, fearing I simply don't have enough of a life experience to be an actual partner for them. I suppose it's because I have never had any relationship (sniff, sniff) and am therefore scared I would be terribly nervy about voicing my opinions on anything (should I be afraid that these might clash with those of any potential partner), because of the fear that I (because of my inexperience) may quickly and "stupidly" destroy something I had been longing for for ages - a relationship with someone who would care for me. In other words, my inexperience means that I am afraid I wouldn't know when should I wish for a compromise, when should I try to make my point and when would it be wiser to accept my partner's opinion. I think that this is the crucial thing that distinguishes actual partnership from simpl-ish relationships of the sugar daddy variety, the understanding of the necessity of thinking both as an individual and as a couple, particularly when it comes to difficult decisions. If people can do that, if they can withstand troubles, the age is not the most important thing around. If they split because of every silly bit or if they run away after trivial disagreements, well, then the age gap usually adds to the level of silliness of their not-quite-relationships...
I've always been attracted to older guys. I haven't been with someone my own age since high school. I always found it difficult to relate to guys my own age and it's kind of stuck I suppose.
My first love was 12 years older than me, I was 19 and he was 31 when we met. Everyone said it wouldn't work because of the age gap but we were together for 7 years. We would still be together if he had managed to quit the drink. My last boyfriend was only 5 years older so it didn't even seem like we had an age gap tbh. Since our split in April I've had a little dalliance with an older guy. Just a bit of no-strings fun before he went abroad and he's 48 (btw I'm 34) but ex-marine and very, very fit! :) But we just clicked and found loads to talk about and we enjoyed being in each other's company. I agree it would be a bit icky if I'd been 16 and he was 30 but at the end of the day if it's legal and consensual then it's not really the business of anybody else is it?
It's only recently that the term 'cougar' has become widely used as the female equivalent of 'sugar daddy' so it would be interesting to hear from some of the guys about their views on that....
I have recently come out of a 'relationship' with a sugar daddy and to me its not about age my previous SD was only 37 while I am 26 so not too much older. I had short SD relationships before and its all about attractions just like any other relationship. There are people who are in it only for the monetary gain and don't like the company of the guy but I couldn't do that.
My OH is 41, he's a business and property owner, very hard working and very successful. I'm a 19 year old student. He pays for everything as I don't have any money. But I cook and clean and do whatever I can. I don't consider him my sugar daddy, I don't love him for his money. I love him.
To be completely honest, i think it's the judgemental people that try to label everyone elses relationships and try to squeeze them in to some pre determined mold are the ones with the issues.
To be honest, I have also dated men twice my age, where I was older, and where the age was equal. they all seemed right at the time. I guess yes, it is the matter of attraction, personal choice and opinion. I am loving the feedback. But, there is something I don't understand...What's so negative about the word "Sugar Daddy"? When I was in UK I had a lot of friends who had sugar daddies, and a lot of my friends had "boytoys" also. Yes, I do agree that this sounds a bit disrespectful calling ppl boytoys or SD or cougars...but it does happen in the world and even though a lot of ppl fantacise about it, it's still something that you are not supposed to openly talk about...isn't it? Please correct me if I am wrong. And now, another challenge that we face in the world is online dating 
Met my first partner online on FB, first 3 months he was the perfect guy, then he turned evil and emotionally abusive, with threatened sexual abuse. All the years of bullying i had suffered growing up i felt i'd be laughed at and told i derserved it, that i was stupid to think the ugly awkward fat girl deserved a boyfriend who was nice to her.
Flipside, met my current partner online too, on Omegle, and he's the most amazing guy ever, so it's hit and miss just like any kind of dating.
As for why sugar daddy is seen as a negative term, the stereo type is of an older letchy kind of guy who has some young overly sexual girlfriend where he's in it for the sexual stuff and her obvious trophy status looks, and she's in it for his money, a real seedy kind of relationship. It's not really a term thats to describe a functional loving relationship bwtween an older guy and a younger woman.
From my own experience the men I have had 'relationships' with or arrangements as most people describe them as the men are more than happy to be known as your boyfriend or will introduce you as their girlfriend when at an event. They treat you like a girlfriend in public I have never been made to feel inferior to them while out at a bar or restaurant or shopping. They like for you to feel comfortable and enjoy the time with them. I have never met a guy who found the term sugar daddy a bad thing most just see it as a judgemental statement to a girl like she is a leach. So they tend to not use the phrase but I suppose everyone is different.
As for why sugar daddy is seen as a negative term, the stereo type is of an older letchy kind of guy who has some young overly sexual girlfriend where he's in it for the sexual stuff and her obvious trophy status looks, and she's in it for his money, a real seedy kind of relationship. It's not really a term thats to describe a functional loving relationship bwtween an older guy and a younger woman.
Perfectly put. The only problem I had with dating my OH was that people would think that's what it was. My bestfriend actually did! She is no longer my bestfriend. A lot of my family think he's only in it for the sex, which is upsetting. But we know what it is so who cares!