So i found the OH on Facebook (evil) and added him under my naughty name. (i pray he doesnt come on love honey)
anyway i wrote thanks for the add (as im slightly sus about his commitment as great as we are) and hes replied what fun I'm looking for.
Oh dear I shouldnt have done it!
oh.... not sure what to say. . . . doesn't sound great.
no it does not!!! lol.....
oh no :( thats never a good thing. are you ok? *hug* has you said anything to him about it? xxx
Awkward!
If it were me I'd continue playing along to see how far it goes, I'd be very curious to know... but I wouldn't actually recommend that for the sake of your relationship!!!
Probably best to confront him about it and have a chat about things.
Yeah. I mean we are not serious... (his words not mine) but he did say hes not misbehaved. (his past is messed up).
Im not sure whether to continue or mention to him someone on his friends list tried to add me on FB?!
Kitty_McPlunder wrote:
External Media Awkward!
If it were me I'd continue playing along to see how far it goes, I'd be very curious to know... but I wouldn't actually recommend that for the sake of your relationship!!!
Probably best to confront him about it and have a chat about things.
I would have to follow it through to see how far he would go! It might not be what wo you want to hear but i think you would always wonder! xxx Hugs xxxx
yeah thats the think ilove.
not sure what angle, as hes always at mine or working... where does he get the time!? lol maybe its just dirty online talk?
Maybe, i've had loads of weird men try to add me and sending messages, and then i see they are married!
i get the same thing, like people you have no connection with! xxx
yes.... well he is slightly addicted to porn! lol
(oh i really hope he never figures out the forum now)
Thing is... the email came through when he text me "in the pub...."
lol okkk.... a mate just told me any male would respond to a pretty photo (and it was good) and he has probably realised it was me playing me at my own game.
Maybe i shouldnt have left that honeytrap article in my bathroom....
ive taken the profile down for now.
we shall see.
occhiverdi wrote:
yes.... well he is slightly addicted to porn! lol
(oh i really hope he never figures out the forum now)
Thing is... the email came through when he text me "in the pub...."
Could still be "in the pub" what with phone technology these days.
Personally - I'd delete him from your kinky account and play it by ear. See how things go in the relationship - if it's "not serious" anyway then it's likely something else will lead it to the end anyway and you'll not be heartbroken if you already know to tread carefully.
Otherwise, delete him from your kinky account and confront him....tell him you've been interested in all the news about "sexting" and what does he think about that, does he think sexual chat is ok online if it doesn't go further?
Sounds to me like he's not physically cheating, only chatting online so finding the opportunity to set the boundaries and tell him that you don't think it's acceptable and if he's doing it he should stop for the sake of the relationship might solve the problem completely.
Adx
Hey Ad
I deleted the whole account, his phone is a retro phone no internet etc.. (photomessages are lucky to get there) so thats not a worry.
He knows my issues from a past relationship, so he picks up quick when I start to his panic. Well we're not serious but hes here 3 nights a week and permanently in contact.. (honestly men at times).. and i'm working on getting it to the serious phase!
Yeah well hes a bit addicted to online giggles so to speak.
I'm going to take it slow as I know his past relationship really burned him and I dont want to scare him by waving wedding magazines at him (hahaha..... )
I'm deleting it and we'll see if he brings it up....
occhiverdi wrote:
lol okkk.... a mate just told me any male would respond to a pretty photo (and it was good) and he has probably realised it was me playing me at my own game.
Maybe i shouldnt have left that honeytrap article in my bathroom....
ive taken the profile down for now.
we shall see.
Maybe you shouldn't read stuff that gives such bad advice.External Media
You don't need dishonesty to reveal dishonesty, it unsurprisingly makes things more dishonest! If it turns out a partner was not dishonest all it does is turn you into the liar. It's an unhealthy way to engage in a relationship.
WandA wrote:
occhiverdi wrote:
lol okkk.... a mate just told me any male would respond to a pretty photo (and it was good) and he has probably realised it was me playing me at my own game.
Maybe i shouldnt have left that honeytrap article in my bathroom....
ive taken the profile down for now.
we shall see.
Maybe you shouldn't read stuff that gives such bad advice.External Media
You don't need dishonesty to reveal dishonesty, it unsurprisingly makes things more dishonest! If it turns out a partner was not dishonest all it does is turn you into the liar. It's an unhealthy way to engage in a relationship.
yerp lesson learned.... he told me hes been good (we had a slight bump about a month after we met) and I think I have to believe him for now.
maybe asking my EX for advice wasnt so smart either :|
god im dumb!
As you say you have learnt a lesson. Honesty is crucial and one silly action can destroy or damage that. Ask the OA for advice not youe ex next time!
I agree with Alicia - If you feel that you cannot trust him then you need to talk to him (face to face) and stop the FB stuff. If you are not serious, then maybe it's time to set some boundaries, work out what you both want, what is acceptable, what is not. This doesn't have to be heavy - but you should both know where you stand.
Most people enjoy a bit of a flirt, but never want it to go anywhere, so it's always possible he was just flattered and was enjoying the bit of unsolicited attention without meaning to take it anywhere.
Unfortunately, much as it'd be nice to just delete the account and pretend nothing ever happened, you know it's going to bother you now not knowing if he was going to try anything with the mysterious FB girl, or indeed if he has in another case that you don't know about. You've let the demons in, and they're damn hard to shut up.
If you can take a deep breath and trust in him, then go for it, this kind of stuff will never end well. But if it stays on your mind, I think you're going to have to fess up that you know. At most, you could claim it was the fake profile of a friend and she tattled, but to be honest, if you're worried enough to have to ask him the awkward questions, then you're not going to believe him when he says he's behaving if he thinks he's getting away with anything he is or was doing (if anything). If you're having the conversation, lay it all out: you know he was messaging someone in a flirtateous way, and want to know what he's playing at.
But, end of the day, either he'll confess to a load of indiscretions and that'll be that, or he's say it was all innocent, no bad intentions, etc. and you'l have to choose to believe him or not. If you think you'll still doubt him even if he claims innocence when confronted with what you know, then it seems kind of doomed. But hanging around, doubting him and worrying and waiting for him to randomly feel guilty is not going to do either of ye any good, and could destroy a possibly perfectly fine relationship.
as others have said its not a good idea
yes you could find out if he was/is/intends to cheat. but what moral high ground do you then have if youve been the one sending messagages? and also how do you prove that he was the only one you sent flirty e mails to.
catching a lie out with a lie is not great ad could lead to more upset than is nescesary.
